To be furious at swimming pool regulars who think they own the bloody pool. To the point of kicking a disabled child?

[Sneezecakesmum]

Dont know who I am angrier with. Myself or the middle aged woman swimming in the local pool apparently doing her daily 50 lengths of breast stroke, when we (the interlopers) dared to be in her way and which gave her the right to kick a 5 year old disabled boy in the chest!

FFS she came up behind us so definitely saw us. I was holding a child festooned in buoyancy aids, (so both arms needed) and facing away from her so I didnt see her. The first thing I knew she kicked/or hit me lightly then with the next stroke kicked out strongly and I felt the childs body rock against me. Luckily he is a tough nut and just looked a bit shocked.

AIBU to want to rip her fucking head off? No apology, no acknowledgement despite being fully aware she hit us!

I just stood there like a wimp feeling it was my fault for being in 'her' pool

You know that thing where you do/say nothing at the time, but rage and vent afterwards? Well I am venting!

It could have been 'accidentally on purpose' or it could have been because her goggles were steamed up. I would suspect the former or I think she would have apologised.

On the one hand, she is being unreasonable to expect to swim lengths as unimpeded as if she was in lanes. I would have apologised if I'd kicked someone in those circumstances (although I might have been less polite if someone had been ambling about in a lane).

On the other hand, I think you were also a bit unreasonable to get in the pool and then simply wander into her trajectory without a second thought. No rules against standing where you like in a public pool with no lanes but it would have been considerate not to stop just where you could see she was swimming. If there were other people bobbing about that she was already avoiding, could you not have aligned with them?

So really you're angry with yourself for handling this badly? Perhaps you should have suggested to the lifeguard that they rope off a lane for adult swimming. YABU and OTT.

Chelsy. thank you for pointing out that breaststroke is a 'forceful stroke'. Thats precisely why the kick was forceful and uncomfortable.

Owl. please dont continue with the 'you have implied references.

You have implied throughout that it is right to kick other people in a swimming pool who are unaware of your presence and not even acknowledge or apologise their actions.

Yes it probably as she was passing you that she kicked, which means that her hands passed you without touching, so surely you were aware she was there and taken a step back?

furk. I was concentrating all my efforts to hold DGS who had umpteen swimming aids on and is awkward to hold, I was not gazing serenely around me looking out for regular swimmers.

Coffee. I couldnt have taken a step back as I felt her touch me (arm I guess) then followed immediately by a kick into DGSs chest. Literally a second or two to react.

the pool is relatively small and the laned pool being used for swimming lessons, so I guess the regular swimmers were in this pool. Too small I think to rope anything off.

I certainly was unaware of this woman swimming, or i would have avoided her as I did for the other swimmers, and parents with toddlers and babies.

Owl. please dont continue with the 'you have implied references.

Why? Will you rip my fucking head off? I said that the deliberate nature was implied by the way it was phrased. Which it was. I'm free to voice my opinions thanks.

You have implied throughout that it is right to kick other people in a swimming pool who are unaware of your presence and not even acknowledge or apologise their actions.

No, I have implied that accidents happen.

So yes YABU for getting annoyed at people swimming in swimming pools.

And for not looking out for your disabled child with vigorously kicking swimmers out. What with that woman swimming in a swimming pool and everything. And for your lack of awareness of other people's rights to use said swimming pool without making them aware of your exclusion zone and disabled child first.

Owl In my opinion it isn't particularly thoughtful to use words like sane and bonkers as you did in that comment. It just isn't nice in RL or written in a forum, so I hope you'll think before you use them next time.

The world's gone mad.

Were you stood by the side?
Maybe she thought that she had kicked the side instead, to give her the benefit of the doubt.

biscuiteer what should I have used instead then? Please do enlighten me.
Sane means rational and sensible.
Bonkers means crazy. Ie ridiculous and stupid.

Both perfectly reasonable.

no we were standing in the middle of the pool. Its a pool all one level so no deep end or shallow end.

Of course she should have apologised for kicking you. I cannot believe the lengths some posters go to just to argue the toss with an OP.

Yanbu this is why I completely avoid swimming pools. If it's not arsey "Swimmers" it's "Fun" dads who think it's ok to splash massively in their quest to be the best parent.

Biscuiteer. Owlcapone is just someone who enjoys being confrontational and offensive. Dont take it personally or pay it any attention.

I'm most certainly not.

Any reasonable person holding a child in a public pool, without lanes, and facing away from a strong swimmer who kicks out forcefully into a childs chest (disabled or otherwise) probably accidentally, and who then proceeds to carry on swimming without apology, would be upset and hurt by this persons actions.

Not if 'I say so' it's you whose story doesn't make any practical sense.

And I stand by my comment, that of course if she kicked you she should have apologised.

But she didn't, which is unfortunate. You are making somewhat of a mountain out of a molehill. I'm assuming your DC is ok? Didnt require hospitalisation?

Biscuiteer. Owlcapone is just someone who enjoys being confrontational and offensive. Dont take it personally or pay it any attention.

Grow up.

It is your responsibility to assess the situation before your child enters the water. You need to be aware of other water users at all times, to ensure your own safety. You were clearly not doing this, neither was the other swimmer. You were both at fault, you possibly more than her as you have a supervisory responsibility to another person, who you placed in a dangerous situation. What might have happened if the other swimmer had got tangled in your child's buoyancy equipment and had pulled him away from you or pulled him under?

Exactly what have I said that is confrontational and offensive anyway?

Any reasonable person holding a child in a public pool, without lanes, and facing away from a strong swimmer who kicks out forcefully into a childs chest (disabled or otherwise) probably accidentally, and who then proceeds to carry on swimming without apology, would be upset and hurt by this persons actions.

Any reasonable person would be upset and hurt, yes. They would not, however, be furious and wanting to "rip her fucking head off."

Sneeze I'm on your side, a public pool is for everyone but that doesn't mean she has more right to the pool than you just because she is swimming up and down! she would have known if she had made contact with a person and therefore should have apologised - it 's called manners. She should, as would most polite swimmers, go around people who are 'in her way'. And if she really wants to swim up and down without being impeded then she should look at the pool timetable and go at a time when lane swimming is available. And I actually think the 'disabled child' part is relevant because your concentration would be on supporting this child and reassuring them that they are safe and it wouldn't be as easy to move this child quickly out of the way even if you had seen that woman. So all in all I definitely don't think you were BU and in fact I think you were pretty restrained because I would have told her off (just like I did with the stupid arse who kicked my baby bump at 9 months pregnant and didn't apologise!)

So I was responsible before entering the water in ensuring suitable buoyancy aids were worn.

I was facing away from a strong swimmer who was aware of us and who must have been aware we couldnt see her as i was looking in the opposite direction.

Its a public pool with no lanes for swimming and there were several other people and swimmers around I managed to avoid.

I was placing a child in danger by taking him into the local pool?

And the responsibility is on me to have eyes in the back of my head? Not quite understanding that argument either.

Also cant ever remember any incident where a swimmer has got entangled in a rubber ring, arm bands or a puddle jumper.