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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To expect work to cover my child care costs?

219 replies

CatThiefKeith · 20/05/2014 14:55

Background is I work as a receptionist at weekends, but the weekday receptionist is having some health problems following a routine operation and I got a phone call this morning asking If I can cover her job for the next fortnight.

Dh works full time, plus 3/4 evenings in a different job, so the only way I could do so would be to employ a childminder or increase her days at preschool and use a childminder for the rest of the day ( it is only open mornings)

It is a minimum wage job, so I would effectively be working 14 days without a day off for less than £3 p/h.

Would I be massively unreasonable to say I will do it if they cover the childcare costs?

OP posts:
Original poster
CatThiefKeith · 20/05/2014 15:43

Whoops. Left out dh's Saturday nights there. Always Saturday nights.

He is a DJ

OP posts:
badtime · 20/05/2014 15:46

The reason places like that behave like that is because people let them. They are taking the piss.

badtime · 20/05/2014 15:49

Sort of cross post with Betty (didn't see the second page)

Original poster
CatThiefKeith · 20/05/2014 15:57

Just tried to call, boss and his 2nd in command both out for the rest of the day so am sending an email. Is this ok do you think?

Dear Boss,

I have looked into childcare costs for the coming weeks, and have discovered that even if I am able to find a childminder at this short notice, the going rate is £4 per hour.

As this is equivalent to 2/3 of my hourly rate, and I will need to employ a childminder for longer than my actual working day I will be unable to take on the extra shifts while xxxx recovers.

Kind regards

Keith

OP posts:
badtime · 20/05/2014 16:08

I think it is better to explain less.

I would just say that due to childcare costs I would not do the extra hours.

(Actually, that is not true - I would say 'no' and leave it at that. You don't need to give a reason.)

badtime · 20/05/2014 16:12

When I worked in a guilt-trippy place, I found that if you make excuses or apologise, they just try to talk you round. You have to be unapologetic and just present them with a statement of how things are going to be.

Original poster
CatThiefKeith · 20/05/2014 16:17

Ok, have sent

Dear Boss

I will be unable to cover as I have no childcare available except on my regular days

Best wishes

Keith

OP posts:
HauntedNoddyCar · 20/05/2014 16:18

I'd just say that the cost of temporary childcare makes it uneconomical at your standard rate and therefore you cannot provide cover.

slithytove · 20/05/2014 16:19

Yes, agree with the email you have sent.

They can hardly come back and say use XYZ childcare as they have no right to force you to leave your child with a stranger.

Hopefully that's the end of it.

Are you going to job hunt now Grin

whatever5 · 20/05/2014 16:23

It wouldn't be at all unreasonable to tell them that you will do it as a one off if they cover childcare costs. I'd be surprised if they don't agree.

LIZS · 20/05/2014 16:24

If you would make a loss your options are :-

  • politely decline as not financially viable
  • work out what level of pay would make it financially viable and make a proposal
  • work out what hours you could cover without incurring additional childcare costs and make a proposal
  • consider whether making a short term loss is worthwhile longer term, ie. might it improve your career/pay prospects
Original poster
CatThiefKeith · 20/05/2014 16:36

Reply!

Can't your Mother / Mother in law do it?

OP posts:
Original poster
CatThiefKeith · 20/05/2014 16:36

That's it. Nothing else. How rude!Shock

OP posts:
BikeRunSki · 20/05/2014 16:40

Say you can't do it due to childcare costs/availability?

Can't they get a temp in?

cosysocks · 20/05/2014 16:40

Wow

BettySwollocksandaCrustyRack · 20/05/2014 16:41

OMG - what a dreadful company.

Reply back "No but maybe you could ask yours"

Bloody hell.

Lilaclily · 20/05/2014 16:42

If you can do it I would because they'll owe you a favour & it'll look good if you want to up your hours in the future

whatever5 · 20/05/2014 16:43

They have got a real cheek! Just say that they your family are not available and let them know how much the childcare will cost. If they are that desperate they will offer to pay it as an expense (if you show proof that you have paid it).

BettySwollocksandaCrustyRack · 20/05/2014 16:47

To be honest that reply shows just how much respect they have for you and your family situation - ie none.

I wouldn't go out of my way at all to accommodate them now, just do your hours and that's it. They obviously don't appreciate it when people help them out and I can't imagine they would think they owe you a favour.

BettySwollocksandaCrustyRack · 20/05/2014 16:48

Lily - what even after that message you think she should still try and help out. She may as well just put a sign on her back saying "kick me" .

OnlyLovers · 20/05/2014 16:49

Can't your Mother / Mother in law do it?

Fuck's sake.

I'd respond:
As I said earlier, unfortunately I will be unable to cover as I have no childcare available except on my regular days.

fuck off you sexist pig Best wishes

Keith

hellsbellsmelons · 20/05/2014 16:49

I am Shock at that response.
It's a definite 'no' now!
How dare they?

slithytove · 20/05/2014 16:49

A good time to remember that no is a complete sentence.

I would honestly just reply "no".

slithytove · 20/05/2014 16:51

Incidentally, I have literally no family childcare where I am, so how do they know OP isn't in the same boat. Very disrespectful and you should not explain your reasons to them OP. They don't need to know your family situation.

LIZS · 20/05/2014 16:51

Don't honour it with a response.

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