To think there is nothing "weird and disgusting" about being naked around a baby

[MissPennySweet]

A twat friend was telling me about two women (lesbians) she knows who have just had a baby and saying that they like to spend time lying in bed topless with the baby (one mum breastfeeding). She said she thinks it's "weird and disgusting" that the other mum would "expose" herself to the baby when she's not using her boobs to feed. I pointed out since the baby is very new they probably want to establish skin to skin contact with both parents and that it's no different to a baby lying on a mans chest.

AIBU to think this is fine and my friend is a raving nutjob?

You are so NBU.

Think your friend has many issues.

She's a nutjob who would hated me as I regularly took mine into the bath with me

I'm sure the baby is properly offended.

Or is absolutely loving the skin-to-skin closeness and the developing bond with his/her parents.

Definitely one of the two.

It sounds like your friends is not a parent!

Raving nutjob. Most people I know are regularly naked around their DC to quite an age. It's just practicalities of life, kids follow you everywhere, or you get in the bath with them, or you take them swimming and share a changing room...

However, the age at which it stops being appropriate to be naked around your child tends to get a little heated

yanbu.

Although I don't get why the Mother not feeding would want to take her top off .... I'd get chilly!

I think your friend has issues about lesbians being allowed to have children.

It's actually really annoyed me what she's said. Friend tried to justify it by saying she (the non birth mum) is not the parent though - erm since they are in a CP and she's named on the birth certificate I'm pretty sure she is the parent

Your friend is probably, deep down, feeling that two women being naked together is what is "weird and disgusting". She can probably convince herself normally that what two adults do in the privacy of their own home is up to them, but once you add a child into the mix, "traditional values" pop up and all sorts of things are suddenly viewed as "wrong" for no real reason.

I agree with you, there's nothing disgusting about nudity around a baby, whether or not you are breastfeeding, and whether or not you are one of the biological parents.

Just wait until the conversations that they're turning the child gay/lesbian - then the will really start!!

The friend is ridiculous!

But talk about nipple confusion!

Yeah I think maybe she's a closet homophobe and thus about to be defriended because she went on and on about lesbians being "allowed" to have children and how lenient it was of the government. I pointed out that lesbians were never not allowed to have children, just now they were allowed to both have parental responsibility

Aren't both parents supposed to try skin to skin regardless of gender? DH was certainly told to do it. YANBU, your drones has issues..
at nipple confusion, a bit like an all you can eat buffet!

Your friend sounds very odd.

And also homophobic.

Drones? Friend.
Skynet has taken over my phone..

part of me wonders if they use the non birth mothers nipples as a dummy

Homophobic nutcase.

Yep, sounds like she has to work pretty hard to sound even vaguely 'okay' about lesbians at all, and her feelings of disgust about the whole situation are prompting her reactions.

I'd imagine through a lot of history, plenty of lesbians have had children. The only differences that 'modern' society make would be legal recognition as a parent, and access to medical help with conception.

part of me wonders if they use the non-birth mother's nipple as a dummy

I doubt it, it is painful enough with the milk. Without ... would be like sticking a peg on it!

I'm now wincing at the thought of having a peg on a nipple..
This friend will get worse as the child gets older you know, every milestone will be examined for evidence of something being wrong because the child has gay parents, behaviour looked at for signs that the child's sexuality is being influenced etc.
She'll basically get boring and more offensive as time goes on.

sezamcregor the op's friend is homophobic, whether she is a parent or not this is still the issue.

Honestly? I don't feel comfortable with DH being naked around our baby, never have.

Maybe she feels the same and isn't actually homophobic?

It's simple homophobia.

DH stopped doing skin to skin after having his chest hair ripped out and a few unforgettable latching on incidents

Yanbu.

When our DDs were born, on both occasions my DH was actively encouraged to take his shirt off and have skin to skin contact with the baby while I was otherwise engaged. This is no different. We also bath/shower with the DDs.

I do wince at the thought of having a baby try to latch on when you're not actually breastfeeding though!

Am I the only one wondering how she knows that they are sitting around half dressed in their own bedroom?