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AIBU?

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Original poster

To feel like everyone has stolen my news

102 replies

Aylish1993 · 15/05/2014 20:49

Just that really as soon as I found I was pregnant I got to tell my mum and pils and that was it because family told family as they do, now my so called 'friend' has just announced it on fb when I was waiting 3 weeks till our baby was born so I could put a picture on. Probably being over dramatic but is it so much to ask that I want to tell people MY news?

OP posts:
AmberLeaf · 16/05/2014 11:39

What's with the shitty posts about the OPs spelling? Hmm

YANBU, it is your news to share.

Some people seem to have missed that the OP is living away from her home town, so perfectly feasible that many people she knows from there would not be aware of her pregnancy.

It's funny, younger people are often criticised for over sharing on facebook, here is a young woman trying to do the opposite, but even then she is in the wrong! Amazing.

Aylish, it's done now so try not to let it bother you too much, soon you will have your baby and all that facebook stuff will just not be important.

Relax and enjoy the next few weeks of peace Grin

CoteDAzur · 16/05/2014 11:39

Suspending her FB account going to stop anyone from posting "Hey Aylish is about to pop! Is there anyone left in the world who doesn't know she is PREGGERS?!?" in their status updates, for all their friends in common to see.

grocklebox · 16/05/2014 11:40

I dont think I will, no. Its not news when you are full term, its public knowledge. Get over it.

TheWomanTheyCallJayne · 16/05/2014 11:41

Have to admit if a friend of mine was due very soon I would make the assumption that the people she has on facebook, called friends for a reason, would also know.

I mean I didn't shout about my last pregnancy on there and had several friends say 'I didn't know you were pregnant' after I gave birth but if someone had chosen to talk to me about prior I would have been fine with it. What with them being my 'friend' and all.

It all seems very attention seeking.

Sparklingbrook · 16/05/2014 11:43

grockle you just sound like you are having a bad day or something now.

I don't have FB because I don't really see the point but from reading threads on here I don't think you should assume anything. Maybe that if the person who's FB it is hasn't mentioned something on there then you don't either?

CoteDAzur · 16/05/2014 11:44

I bet OP can spell "know". She is deliberately substituting the world "no" for the word "know" to save a few letters.

Why make people read phrases like "didn't feel the need of letting people that I don't really talk to no " three times to understand what she means?

grocklebox · 16/05/2014 11:47

yeah, i am I'm in the middle of another m/c, so have little sympathy for such juvenile and pointless facebook "news stealing". I'd have the same opinion on any other day though. OP is about to have a baby, she needs to grow up and focus on things that matter.

MostWicked · 16/05/2014 11:47

So a friend, who you don't like, has told a bunch of FB friends, who you don't like, some news about you that wasn't a secret.

I think you need to change the way you use FB. That is the nature of it.

Had this been announced by someone you had told and sworn to secrecy at 6 weeks, I would see that as unreasonable, but not when you've only got a few weeks to go and it is not a secret.

You don't actually get to control all the information about you, not when it is already known or available.

AmberLeaf · 16/05/2014 11:48

It all seems very attention seeking

It's the very opposite of attention seeking.

Cote if you really need to read that 3 times to get it, it is you with the problem.

AmberLeaf · 16/05/2014 11:52

Sorry that you are going through a mc grockle, that's really crappy.

Your harshness to the OP is somewhat understandable, but still unfair, so maybe you should hide this one.

TheWomanTheyCallJayne · 16/05/2014 12:00

Amberleaf. I think it's attention seeking because it means the op can go tahdah look at me I had a baby and every will gush wow you had a baby and told no one look at you. I have an acquaintance like this. Wants to be quirky and 'different' and told how wonderful she's soo relaxed. I say acquaintance because I wouldn't have her on my fb.

Just casually mentioning it but not bringing it up every second is less attention seeking.

eurochick · 16/05/2014 12:01

grockle I'm sorry you are mcing. It is sh1t. Mine made me very angry at the world. So understand why you are being harsh on the OP, but you are being harsh. There is no reason why a pg woman cannot focus on the trivial as well as the big stuff.

TillyTellTale · 16/05/2014 12:13

YANBU OP, if someone actually announced it.

It's perfectly reasonable to not want to make a big announcement of pregnancy, and the person who is pregnant gets 'announcement rights' if she declines to announce, the rights don't pass to someone else!

If it was just a post on your wall, asking how you were, then YANBU to think the div could have noticed that you hadn't mentioned it on fb yet. But she was exactly unreasonable to assume everyone would know, just thoughtless and presumably a sharer herself.

TillyTellTale · 16/05/2014 12:14

*wasn't

Coumarin · 16/05/2014 12:21

Thanks Grockle Hide this thread. I'm going to.

Theodorous · 16/05/2014 12:59

You don't own information, only a five year old would think that. Lucky you to have news to be "stolen" (that is shared by people who are happy for you) lot's of people would just be happy to have the news in the first place.
Grow up and fast.

grocklebox · 16/05/2014 13:07

I don;t think Im being harsh. She is being ridiculous. Its not news, its plain for the world to see. You cant have news stolen from you that anyone with eyes can see. She's being unbearably precious.
There are no such thing as announcement rights. Is that how self absorbed and self important people actually feel? Its pfb to the extreme.

Theodorous · 16/05/2014 13:15

Take care grockle I am so sorry. But I agree that this is a normal opinion in any day of the week. School gate mum crap.

LangenFlugelHappleHoff · 16/05/2014 13:24

Is it really that bigger of a deal? I mean really??

grockle Flowers

Sparklingbrook · 16/05/2014 13:25
brokenhearted55a · 16/05/2014 13:27

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

TillyTellTale · 16/05/2014 13:32

grockle I'm sorry for your week.

I wouldn't make a birth announcement in the local paper for someone without asking, so I wouldn't make a birth announcement on FB for someone, either.

I wouldn't broadcast anyone's health information on FB without their permission, whether it's gallstones, pregnancy, or a new glasses prescription.

DrankSangriaInThePark · 16/05/2014 13:34

I'm sorry about your miscarriage Grockle, and you are a poster I had always liked.

You are being a fucking mean girl to the OP though, and maybe ought to check your own punctuation before you start ripping other people's to pieces.

Flowers OP. Enjoy the rest of your pregnancy.

wannaBe · 16/05/2014 13:41

at 37 weeks it isn't news though.

And it is worth bearing in mind that if you had actually kept this to yourself and announced a baby when born it would likely have backfired spectacularly, because instead of "oh congratulations," comments you would most likely get "oh, had no idea you were pregnant," ones.

Withholding news of a pregnancy and then waiting to do a big announcement on the birth of a baby is just odd. And attention seeking. I would probably unfriend someone for that.

BolshierAyraStark · 16/05/2014 13:44

YABU, the secrecy is just plain odd.

Top tip-if you don't like someone don't be friends with them-on FB or in real life.

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