Am I being unreasonable to want my doctor to apologise to me?

[tennor]

To cut a long story short my life is falling apart at the moment, I need to sort out work (retrain) and somewhere to live among other things. I’ve been suffering depression and went to the doctor A who referred me to my borough’s psychological services. I spoke to them on the phone and they have made an appointment for me, however they said they were worried about my mental state and asked me to make another appointment at the doctors (I guess for anti depressants). The morning of my appointment I found out that a friend of mine had died. Another Doctor, Doctor B, looked at my letter from Psychological therapies and said “well I don’t know what they expect me to do” she asked me about my mental state too, I replied that I feel stressed and angry. She told me “I know what you’re doing you’re putting this on to bump your way up the housing ladder” – however I am not even on the “housing ladder”. Taken aback by this comment I said I’m stressed out, my friend has died and asked if she could prescribe me some Valium. No she replied, I asked if she would prescribe just 1 pill, she said “I don’t give people like you valium”. I said I think that she is not a nice person and she showed me the door.

I walked out on to the street totally stressed out, muscles cramping. I tried to go home yet found myself walking up and down the road. After about 30 minutes I went back to see Dr B, I knocked on her door, she opened it and said she was busy, I said ok i will wait. She then walked past me and around the corner and that was the last time a saw her. Two minutes later the receptionist came around and asked me to leave, I told her I just want to see Dr B to get some Valium, she told me the doctor doesn’t want to see you and this surgery doesn’t prescribe Valium. She said If I had a problem, write a complaint.

I went back outside pacing up and down and decided I would write a complaint letter, I went home and wrote the letter which included the facebook address of my dead friend and my post to him which I had left that morning before going to the doctors. I went back to the doctors with my letter, I wanted her to go on line and look at it so she could see that I was not making this up.

I was asked to wait in reception and she would see me, 20 minutes later the police walked in and told me that she has made a complaint about me being aggressive and that she is not going to see me. The police had the new video and audio cameras recording everything that went on, I have to say they were the nicest police I have ever met, If they didn’t have the video cameras I would have certainly have been arrested. I told them im not leaving so arrest me but they defused the situation and I left peacefully with an appointment to see a different doctor.
However I am still angry at the way Dr B treated me, and her outright lie to the police about me being aggressive. I asked the receptionist if she had ever seen me be aggressive and she replied no.
i want to add that I have never had valium prescribed to me before or any other drug for that matter from my doctors and that I hardly ever visit the doctor. i want to book an appointment with her so she can read my compliant letter and visit my dead friends facebook page and apologise to me. Am I being unreasonable to the cow?

Of course she can ask the practice for her medical notes.

Really think the abuse macdoodle has had on this thread has been unacceptable, he/she has been called vile, unprofessional and inhumane! From a stranger on an internet forum with no knowledge of his or her practice in RL. Is this really allowed on MN?

If the notes have been sent away then they won't be there. For notes about mental health you sometimes have to check with the person who wrote the letter first. As the psychologist will still have her notes and they sent the email it seems sensible to ask them for a copy of it as they are the ones that have to decide if she can see it or not.
Access to medical records is different when psychiatric problems are concerned.

friend said that that surgery does prescribe Valium

Forgive me if I am wrong, but isn't up to the doctor what medication you get? And in this instance they didn't think Valium was appropriate?

I have to say I think that YABBVVVU, and this comes from someone who is currently paralysed through a procedure going wrong.

As others have said it is up to the DR as to what to prescribe you. AD medication is not a 'quick fix' and I would be suprised if the next dr prescribed it for you either.

There doesn't seem to be anything suggesting that if OP were to request the letter the GP was reading as part of her online notes (I'm
Guessing this was the report) the surgery would be unable to provide the letter for her. So it's perfectly reasonable for her to ask her (ex) GP in the first instance.

This thread has made me reach a whole new level of appreciation for my GP practice. What an utter shambles it all sounds.

Valium is a very short term fix. It, if it works, aimply makes you dopey and drowsy. It won't alleviate the anxiety altogether.

Speaking from experience as well it does not suit everyone. The only time I took 2mg for anxiety I ended up being awake 48 hours and had to have urgent psych care. I've since found out I'm highly intolerant to both it and anything like it. Triggers mild psychotic episodes, and I have to have injections of reversal medicactions. Seemingly quite a lot of people are liable to the same effect.

In your state of mind the precscription of a controlled drug would not have helped at all. I can imagine it would have caused far, far nor eproblems.

If for example you took it, it did nothing, you did something drastic, your doctor would have to be able to justify it's prescription.

I hope things improve at your new surgery.

I know what it's like to have doctors who don't understand by the way, I had one laugh when I told her I self harmed. She asked if I enjoyed it.

But for everyone's safety you can't name these people online. It isn't worth the possible repercussions.

I for one am grateful that GPs post on MN and don't want them to be put off by posters like Brian and canthis because GPs posting will provide far more value than those two ever will. Combined.

If you say so Mrsmerton. And what value have you brought to the table? I haven't been rude to Macdoodle at all, just questioned her judgement. Or don't you think HCPs should have their judgement questioned at times?

"name these people online" what like a witch hunt?
Because they cant defend themselves or tell their side of the story, because patient confidentiality trumps all, even lies and libel.
I have had my name smeared on FB by a disgruntled (and very unreasonable patient) to the degree of threatening to come and kick me and my daughters in the stomach, lovely. I live where I work and my children go to the local schools, I had parents coming up to me asking what was going on, I had to grit my teeth and laugh it off, absurd. I was terrified someone would say something to my 12 and 6 yr old DD's, nice.
And all because she didnt get what she wanted (which was very unreasonable and not medically indicated). And yes I reported her to FB and the police, rightly so. But I guess its ok because I am just "one of these people".
Bowing out now ladies.

Just came back to this thread and realised OP plastered details

Oops posted too soon, wouldn't have posted previous message if I had known, it completely changes my opinion.

No, no, I don't mean it like that all. I'm in full support of you. I'm saying she shouldn't name her GP online at all. It's not OK at all what's happened to you, and I hope it was sorted out. I hope I haven't offended you in any way as
I really wasnt intending to.

She posted a thread last night with the full details of her GP and surgery, that's why I said what I did.

ah ok sorry I understand thanks and no offense
Just a touchy subject for me.

I'm not surprised the OP has been removed from the practice list. I also think some of the comments that macdoodle "has had levelled st her are unacceptable.

We don't know what happened as we only have the OP's account but I doubt the police would have been called for a trivial incident.

Perhaps the OP needs crisis intervention but I doubt any GP would have prescribed as she wanted. Her behaviour on this thread is not that of someone capable of reasoned negotiation.

It's impossible to know what exactly went on in that consultation room, we should shy away from making 'the GP is clearly clueless' etc. statements as they are patently unhelpful. I'm not surprised the practice have removed you from their list.

What is clear to me is that the GP was asked to see someone who the psychology team felt was a danger to themselves or others. This is not the remit of the average GP -antidepressants take time to work, and many increase the risk of self hard and suicidal ideation during that time. How is the GP supposed to make a call in ten minutes as to whether OP is going to be one of those who are affected by this?

In this situation the psychology team should surely have involved the crisis team and arranged for admission or at the least a full assessment as to safety in the community - before sending her to an unknown GP for drugs that could do more harm than good at that stage.

OP, your OP and your update are different .

You have to understand that regardless of your intentions your actions would have come across as potentially aggressive. I can't see what other action the surgery and doctor could have taken.

Well said, macdoodle. Some people seems to think that the time and money available in the NHS is limitless and that their GP is there to sort out every problem.

SpamTroll, the other action they should have taken was to call the crisis team when she left to get her emergency help.

First, the GP had no right to make any derogatory comments about your life. It's not her job to offer an opinion on anything other than your health. As you are already a patient with a known referral for specialist treatment who has been called in for urgent follow up in the meantime, I would expect a constructive attitude from the GP concerned. You could raise this quite legitimately.

However, naming a drug seldom yields results and valium is one that GPs are reluctant to hand out because, aside from the abuse potential, there are generally better options.

Really appalled at some of the comments to Macdoodle. Would you rather actual doctors didn't comment or something? I hardly think violence by patience towards medics is unknown, its a growing problem and of course its not unreasonable to expect to do your job without being made to feel threatened or harassed!

I think there are certain internet trolls out there who attack any woman professional.

Shocked re comments to macdoodle. I work within the nhs and remember during my induction once a police man came in to give us lessons on personal safety. He said he was shocked re how many of us have been attacked by the patients we help. I don't know anyone who hasn't in my job but it shouldn't be like that. We should be safe in our place of work. I try 100% for my patients and 99.9% are amazing and I'm so lucky yo spend time with them. But the 0.1% of which I had one today shouldn't be seen in the community but within a unit which can offer support to both the patient and the member of staff. The op acting strangely and her comments following her original post is worryingly. I really hope she gets the help she needs. I can understand why the police were called and completely understand why she has been removed from the practice. Hopefully a new relationship with a new practice will help. Mental illness is hidden and hArd for most people to understand. A hidden problem. X

I think yabu and i do understand why the gp called the police. They aren't going to just prescribe drugs because you ask. That being said i really hope you get the help you need, as it sounds like you've had an awful time.

OP please stop going to that surgery, they cannot help you.

You do however need quite urgent help as you are very angry and upset, and feeling alone and rejected.

Please put your efforts into finding a GP and do listen for advice rather than ask for specific drugs. Just tell them how you are feeling and try to take the advice.