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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Maternity Leave

94 replies

Mmolly2013 · 14/05/2014 22:22

I am going on Maternity leave soon. Currently working 35 hours per week earning about £1100 per month. Dh is on about the same.

When my maternity pay starts can i applying for working tax credits or anything else to help us out, as maternity pay means i will only get around £550 per month. So worried about how im going to live on that as rent is £300 each.

how does everyone do it

OP posts:
WooWooOwl · 14/05/2014 23:04

For good reason!

Otherwise you could have families with a husband earning £80k a year and a SAHM claiming full tax credits and all the other benefits.

Why do you think you should be able to keep your finances separate when you're having a baby together?

Original poster
Mmolly2013 · 14/05/2014 23:09

Juat because we are having a baby does not mean that my dh has to start paying my debts etc as that would be unfair. And if thats your attitude I feel sorry that you would assume your dh should do exactly that. I respect my partner a bit more than thzt he works just as hard to get his money as I currently do.

Before anyone insists on jumping down my throat if you could go back and read as I said money which does not include the baby.

OP posts:
Cookiepants · 14/05/2014 23:11

But OP just because you are having a baby you want wider society to pay your debts instead? Confused

allisgood1 · 14/05/2014 23:13

Woah there's a lot of misinterpretation and putting words in OP's mouth tonight! Just because she chose to post in AIBU for traffic does not authorize other posters to be so vile Confused

WooWooOwl · 14/05/2014 23:13

So you think the state has more responsibility to pay for the drop in your income than your husband who created the reason for that drop in income with you?

You're right that your DH doesn't have to start paying your debts, but it's bloody cheeky to think that benefits should should paying them for you just because you've chosen to have a baby.

If you're so against your DH paying your expenses, then don't take full maternity leave and go back to work after your six week check.

freezation · 14/05/2014 23:13

But you would be able to pay your debts if you were working. You're not working because you're having a child together. If he took on child caring responsibilities and earned £550 would you not support him? You are a partnership. Things should be shared, debts included. But it sounds like you'd prefer the tax payer to pay your debts rather than your husband.

jeanlucpicard · 14/05/2014 23:14

But you have entered into a partnership, biologically as well as financially when you married yes? Your debts are no longer your own you have a partner...Why are you still trying to be an island?

Original poster
Mmolly2013 · 14/05/2014 23:14

If its something that I qualify for then why would I turn it down if it would make things a little easier.

Who that has a child here can say that they qualify for working tax credits, tax credits or even child benefits and has said no Id rather strugglw.

OP posts:
freezation · 14/05/2014 23:15

No one is putting words in her mouth allisgood. Simply responding to what she has said!

Cookiepants · 14/05/2014 23:16

I don't think anyone is putting words into her mouth. OP is asking if they are entitled to any benefits to maintain their current lifestyle while she is on mat leave.

I would step over my granny for a full year at home with my son, but I can't afford it so I don't get to.

mindthegap79 · 14/05/2014 23:16

The baby is half his so of course he needs to support the family unit, proportionally paying more than you, because he's still earning. You won't be, because you're looking after your joint baby, made jointly.

You say that he shouldn't be saddled with your debts, but does that mean that we taxpayers should support you instead so that the perdon you're raising a child with doesn't have to be involved? That's basically what you're saying isn't it?

Wtaf Hmm

jeanlucpicard · 14/05/2014 23:16

A self imposed struggle in your case though!

Original poster
Mmolly2013 · 14/05/2014 23:18

So basically the answer to my initial question is that everyone here gets partners to pay for more.

Thanks for all the support its my first child and Im just not 100percent on how everything will turn out so was hoping that people would say that you manage etc etc this is I do.for example.

But anyway thanks again ever helpful.

OP posts:
Cookiepants · 14/05/2014 23:19

Nobody is saying turn down help you are entitled to OP, but rather you are not likely to be entitled to it.

Maternity leave is something you have while you can afford it, otherwise nearly everyone would take the maximum entitlement wouldn't they?

Original poster
Mmolly2013 · 14/05/2014 23:20

mindthegap79 I could gurantee that you get some form of money from the government so get off our high horse.

OP posts:
Cookiepants · 14/05/2014 23:21

You do manage OP. There is never enough money and its never the right time. I never thought we would manage on 1/3 of normal household income (I am the main breadwinner ) but we have and it hasn't been that much of a hardship.

However 9 months of leave is all I could afford without going into debt so now I go back to work.

NeedsAsockamnesty · 14/05/2014 23:21

Where has she said she should be assessed for benefits on her income alone as opposed to household income?

I must have missed that bit

freezation · 14/05/2014 23:23

You will manage. And if you have to go back to work sooner then that's what you do. But I would have thought it blindingly obvious that the higher earner pays for more when you're on maternity leave. YANBU to ask if you're entitled to benefits but YABVU to think that you should get money so that your partner doesn't have to support you and your debts.

Original poster
Mmolly2013 · 14/05/2014 23:23

Thanks cookiepants, I think I will try keep as much pay as I can aside whilst I can.

OP posts:
eurochick · 14/05/2014 23:25

You've both created this child. You both need to support it. I don't understand why you think it is the responsibility of taxpayers to support you and pay your debts rather than the father of the child.

Btw I'm very strong on being financially independent and we have maintained our own accounts through living together and the early years of marriage. In addition we have a joint account to pay joint costs. We pay into this in proportion to our incomes. To date that means I have been paying the most in. When my mat pay goes to smp he is going to have to step up and meet the shortfall so that our new family's needs are met (and of course that is exactly what he expects to do). When I go back to work he will take a couple of months off to look after the baby and I will then have to increase my share paid into the account that supports us.

mindthegap79 · 14/05/2014 23:26

I get statutory maternity pay, that's it. I wish I could claim more but dh's salary means were not entitled. Thank god we share our finances otherwise it'd be mightily unfair!

jeanlucpicard · 14/05/2014 23:28

eurochick that's exactly how it works in my household.

mindthegap79 · 14/05/2014 23:29

And mine.

arethereanyleftatall · 14/05/2014 23:35

With regard to your question 'how do we do it?', - we saved before we had children. Hth.

arethereanyleftatall · 14/05/2014 23:37

Sorry, uncalled for. But some of your responses to people trying to help haven't been friendly.

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