To think that if your feet are small enough to wear these shoes you are too young for high heels?

[unrulysun]

I saw these shoes in a branch of Monsoon today. I see plenty of things for little girls which make me roll my eyes but these actually made me stop and stare and then a few minutes later go back into the shop to talk to someone.

The heel on these is a good inch high. My DD is 3 and her feet are size 9. The ones I saw were in a size 7 which I think DD last had when she was 2. She’s not particularly enormous for her age so I think these shoes are definitely for 2 – 3 year olds. I don’t know what size they go down to. AIBU to think that a 2 or 3 year old shouldn’t be walking around in high heels? This isn’t wearing your mum’s high heels this is ‘these are your new shoes’.

And yy I know ‘you don’t need to buy them if you don’t want to’ and I won’t buy them. But I care about the little girls who they are bought for. I don’t think any little girl should be put into shoes like this. Frankly I’d be worried DD would twist an ankle in heels this high. She certainly wouldn’t be able to run or play. And I’m sad that these are on sale for little girls. Not in some weird online place but in a high street shop.

I’m going to complain to Monsoon. I would have liked to have given them the feedback instore today but the sales assistant shrugged and said ‘I’m just a sales assistant’ and the manager was ‘too busy’ to talk to –annoying people who think girls should be allowed to be children-- me.

Heels only cause damage if worn over a long period of time (weeks or months) a special occasion won't hurt them any.

High heels don't make someone superficial. Attitude does. You can teach a child that while it is nice to look good on the outside, and you if you want to look pretty go own it, that inner beauty is more important. Inner beauty and outer beauty aren't mutually exclusive.

Placing more importance on those things than your attitude is what makes someone superficial.

Have you seen the heelson some of the boots available for boys? Timberland Doc Martens and the like. They are no higher than the heel on those shoes. In fact most shoes have a heel higher than the toe, it is bad for developing feet to be constantly flat.

Seriously OP, I understand your sentiment, but you are aiming you gun at the wrong product. There isn't anything wrong wth those shoes.

No pipbin, I have never worked in retail smile Thank you for your advice. Store managers in places like Monsoon are only there to manage the staff. They have no say in what they stock, how it is displayed, what window displays they have, how the store is laid out.
They make sure the shop is staffed, clean tidy and the stock is displayed. They can do nothing about the stock and to be honest most likely wouldn't pass your thoughts on.
However, if you write a letter then you will get so much further.

joking aside, I think part of the reasoning behind this thread is the question - why do little girls need to wear potentially uncomfortable and restrictive clothing to feel 'special' and 'grown up'?

I assume the op only has one pair of shoes as we don't need more than one?

There are plenty of things in life that people don't need but that doesn't make them bad

Alarm I find all dresses uncomfortable and impractical. Where would that leave me in your wedding party? I also don't wear uncomfortable shoes but don't seek to impose my notions of what is comfortable on others. Many shoes I find excruciating others love, and vice versa.

I bought some of them for my dd. She's 9 and is only size 7/8 (really!!)
Also uses a wheelchair and can't stand independently so the walking in heels a non issue here.

I was chuffed to bits to find sommat so tiny and heeled- she seems to think they're pretty stellar too

I think a piece in the Daily Mail may be in order? Complete with sad face?

These ones are 2.5 cms, that's well below the 4cms the chiropodists give as their recommended maximum.

OP doesn't seem to get the point that it is not only 3yos who have size 7 feet. And your DC don't need to be a bridemaid at all, so it's not necessary to consent to your child taking that role if they are too young for the proposed attire.

There's a contradiction between a couple of posters saying my dd/niece/sister wears heels all the time and can run and play football in them etc. and those saying it's just a one off, what's the problem? The problem is, if it's just a one off, the shoes are not going to be comfortable, the child won't be able to run and play in them easily, and are therefore restricted by looking pretty and their parents wanting them to look grown up.

I didn't impose any notions of what I find comfortable on anyone in my wedding party, cardi

I had a colour scheme (just about). And that was it. my bridemaids could have worn trousers, and I would happily have seen them do so. They chose to wear dresses (much as my dd2 does - refuses absolutely to wear trousers/shorts/leggings).

Equally with the shoes - they had absolute free reign to chose whatever they wanted, style-wise. My only concern for the day was that everyone was comfortable, and enjoyed themselves.

I bought my daughter some of these for her third birthday in red. Along with her Dorothy dressing up outfit. She was obsessed with the wizard of oz and absolutely adored them. They have never been worn outside the house, purely as dressing up shoes. I have never once asked her to wear them (asked her to take them off plenty though!). Tbh, much prefer them to the dress up plastic heels you can get, her feet always used to just slip off those and she'd twist her ankle. For the record, never encouraged her to wear those either. And I never wear heels (despite being a midget of 4 ft 10, really don't care enough about how I look and value comfort too much) so she genuinely has decided that that is how she would like to dress up.

Yabu.

Haven't read all of thread but thanks for link op. So hard to get girls shoes with a heel. Dd has to wear heal as very high instep and these should be great.

Aaaaargh! I and many others have said this loads, Alarm. They don't need heels. They don't need any kind of clothing to feel 'special'. Sometimes, though, they might want that - and while I am the last to cave to something just because a child wants it, I don't see anything wrong with wanting this. PrincessBabyCat has it exactly.

YABU there's nothing wrong with them. They're just a bog standard bridesmaid shoe. I'd let my daughter wear them (although she's 20 with hobbit feet so I doubt they'd fit.)

Op, dd has to wear a heel as odd feet which means without a heel she can't walk for any length of time without pain. Does that answer your question?

why do little girls need to wear potentially uncomfortable and restrictive clothing to feel 'special' and 'grown up'?

My little brother hated wearing suits and ties as a kid. They're restrictive. Why do little boys have to wear uncomfortable clothes made for adults?

They don't. Neither do grown women. But sometimes they choose to, and that's ok.

Personally, I find a middle ground. You can find fabulous outfits and shoes that are both stunning and comfortable.

When I was a kid and as an adult if I didn't like my shoes, I took them right off and walked around church or whatever the occasion in sock feet. Drove my mother nuts, and she never could break me of it. I can't tell you how many shoes I lost at school dances. I did it on my wedding day too. :)

Your wedding sounds fun, Alarm. I'd have loved it. However, I wouldn't extrapolate from it that that was the correct way to have a wedding and every other way was superficial.

yes, you may have said it. I find it alarming that so many people accept that to feel special, and grown up, and be pretty, and dress up (and all the other phrases which have cropped up on this thread), that practicality (for small children - the ability ot walk, run and jump/skip about without threat of twisitng an ankle) and comfort go out of the window.

I find this equally odd for adults as for children.

And no, I don't accept that children want it off their own backs, tbh. they want it because it is seen as desirable, but then that just comes back to the point that the whole thing is weird,, tbh.

I've got to ask, why ask AIBU if you are so resolute in your opinion?
What's the point? Why not just make the statement?

I mean you're entirely entitled to your opinion of course, but if you weren't interested in other people's opinions then why ask for them?

DD1 (8) had some very nice pink satin monsoon shoes with slight heel for Christmas. DH allowed her to wear them to a BBQ at a neighbours house. Before I joined them (after work) she managed to play football and climb trees in them, so I can confirm that "children can be children" in such shoes.

That's the thing when you ask AIBU?

Some people will think you are.

I don't think I said anything about being superficial? I'm not sure where that's come from? I'm worried about girls being judged on their apearance.

I also haven't said we should have nothing we don't need. I have asked why you would put a heel on a shoe for a very small child. I can't think of a reason to do that.