To be a bit shocked at employers son always walking around house in boxers...

[KeepOnKeepingOnAndOnAndOnAndOn]

I do a bit of part time work for a lady at her house. Twice now I have been working and her 20 year old son has risen from bed and swanned by me in his boxers to go down stairs for his brekky.

AIBU to find this a bit bizarre. I am often about the house and we I haven't worked there years or anything- hence i don't know them well.

I get very uncomfortable at a bloke in his tight tiny boxers and a tshirt strutting about. Am I a prude? I mentioned it to dh and he was raging! Said he would never do this.

[Cheekybleeder]

He wants you

[HoneyDragon]

I lived with three males at one point, dh (then dp) and two male lodgers.

Wandering round in boxers and t-Shirt appeared to be the norm of an evening.

Although I did appreciate the finger over each nipple dash downstairs if they were grabbing a t shirt to thrown from the dryer, it's nice that they saved my delicate sensibilities from a uncovered man nipple

It's a fact that you are not topless if your nipples are covered.

[bbcessex]

I don't think you're being unreasonable at all... I wouldn't feel comfortable working in a house where someone was walking around in their underwear. It wouldn't worry me so much if he was just getting up, getting something and then going back upstairs.. if he was hanging around in communal areas, he should bloody well get dressed!

I can see that the kid doesn't think twice about it though.. probably doesn't even cross their mind.

I would be more pissed off if it were a 'proper' adult, like the dad though.. then I would think it was totally weird / disrespectful.

I do also think though that your DH is mad to get the rage about it.. that's a bit OTT.

[KeepOnKeepingOnAndOnAndOnAndOn]

I am mid twenties and he is early twenties and looks young to me. I prefer rugged older men.

My dh feels he is walkin about in his tiny boxers to be provocative and because of this feels threatened he may fancy me.

I just think the guy is immature and not giving me any thought!

[SabrinaMulhollandJjones]

My friends DH used to come down in just boxers in the morning whenever we stayed at their house. I found it pretty grim tbh. They weren't nice boxers, and the gap in them was always threatening to gape

[KeepOnKeepingOnAndOnAndOnAndOn]

If it was a woman doing the same i would a a bit confused too, though not so awkward !

[JingletsJangletsYellowBanglets]

OP: my employers' family member dresses inappropriately and it's a bit "cringeworthy"
Mumsnet: your DH is a controlling twat - does he have any redeeming qualities?

I wouldn't have walked around in my underwear in my 20s if there were strangers working in the family home. Why the fuck people think it's ok just because it's a man doing it - beyond me.

[KeepOnKeepingOnAndOnAndOnAndOn]

Dh is not controlling ffs! I wear the trousers if anything. We are both jealous at times. He is a bit insecure , but he doesn't try to control me, he couldn't!

[lottiegarbanzo]

Thing is, this being a bit inappropriate for your working situation and your DP being jealous are two totally different issues. You've conflated them, or accepted his conflation, without question. That is genuinely odd.

Your earlier answer to my question is hilarious! So you are soooo hot that men need their dicks encased in clothing to have any hope of controlling their primal urges in your presence? Yeah, right. You and your DP need to get over yourselves, frankly. No-one else is actually that into you....

[KeepOnKeepingOnAndOnAndOnAndOn]

Lottie> omg what!? Where is the venom from? You are clearly into me. Fair bit love to hav so much venom over my bloody post. Calm down!

Men look at women, not just me. I am oregnant so I doubt he is slathering over me ?

[lottiegarbanzo]

I'm just responding to what you said, which was really quite strange and trying to understand the issue you present. Go back and read your words yourself.

I'm not being the slightest bit venomous, just reflecting back to you how oddly your DP's response (as interpreted and described by you) comes across to other people.

take it or leave it. I'm really not bothered.

[qazxc]

I've worked for the same family for years. (started when the son was 5, he is now 23)
The son and all his mates walk around the house in boxers and have done since teenage. It seems to be the normal state of things and there is absolutely nothing sexual in it.

[Solaia]

OP, against the tide here but I think YANBU. I'm amazed at some of the responses on here.

I would wear clothes if I had someone in the house, DH would wear clothes with someone in the house and I would ensure that my teenage DS (if I had one) was wearing something more than underwear. Yes, it's my house but fgs have some decorum!

I have worked as help in a few homes, and I now have help in my home, and I would NEVER expect an adult in their pants to feature in either of those ventures!

My jury is out about your husband but tbh I think his position is understandable. Maybe not 'raging' exactly but I can understand him being a bit

[Vintagecakeisstillnice]

Leaving the husband stuff aside.

I think it's rude. Whether this man likes it or not for a period of time his home is the OPs place of work. It doesn't matter what the nature of the work is the OP has the right to feel comfortable.

He's not a teenager, and even if he was its basic respect to consider the feelings of others. It would take all of 2 seconds to throw on a robe or trackie bottoms.

Yes it is his home bit the fact that someone is working there means he HAS to think twice, and I'm sure no matter what the OPs job is he benefits from it in s

[SuburbanRhonda]

I think you should tell your employer that this makes you feel uneasy, because I think between you and your DH, you are in danger of making something out of this for no reason, thus putting the employer's son at risk of false accusations. The son would probably be incredulous that you have even noticed what he was wearing, never mind discussed it with your DH.

[Vintagecakeisstillnice]

Damn it

Anyway I'm sure this man benefits from the OPs work.

Oh and just to put my cards on the table, we are a very relaxed house, nudity is normal. And yes we do have various people in and out of the house.

[PersonOfInterest]

Yes its his home.

But, While its your place of work I don't think YABU to expect him (and anyone else) to be fully clothed.

[angelos02]

YANBU. It is disrespectful to swan around the house in underwear when there is a guest in the house. His parents haven't brought him up to understand social norms.

[SuburbanRhonda]

Interesting, isn't it, that there was thread a while back in which a poster asked whether her daughter, a home care assistant, was being unreasonable in expecting people not to smoke in their homes while she was working there, because of the health risks of passive smoking and how it makes her clothes smell.

Pretty much everyone said the daughter should suck it up as it was the client's home and they were entitled to do what they wanted in it.

Yet on here we have people saying the son should put on a "robe" because the OP has a jealous husband who thinks every male on the planet is after his wife

[Writerwannabe83]

Is this guy attractive??
If so I'd just enjoy the view

[Caitlin17]

I don't think you're being unreasonable. If we can put aside the how hot are you/ how jealous is your husband issue I think it's extremely ill mannered of him to walk around in his underwear.

I'm a bit astonished at the idea this is normal behaviour. My son is 23 and no longer lives at home but he didn't behave like this.

[ConferencePear]

I wouldn't like this.
As for your DH - well maybe he understands, better than the women here do, why this young man appears in his pants.

[SuburbanRhonda]

conferencepear, read through the OP's posts about why her DH is raging and see if you still think he is more perceptive than most.

caitlin the jealousy is a key issue. The OP knows her DH gets jealous of other men, yet still felt it necessary to tell him about this, rather than doing the sensible thing of discussing it with her employer.

[Caitlin17]

Suburban the jealousy issue is bonkers. If one of my cleaners had complained about my teenage son swanning around in his underwear (which he didn't) I'd have told him not to do it , but if she'd told me because it was her husband who didn't like it I'd have been very surprised.

[Caitlin17]

And no I definitely don't think her husband is more perceptive than most; far from it.

But if we can take that out of the equation there's often threads on here about nudity. I really don't on the whole want to see other people's genitals whether attached to small children, teenage boys or grown-ups. Boxers are one layer of thin cotton and are not just the same as shorts or swimming shorts.