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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to be unsurprised that Jeremy Clarkson used the N word?

335 replies

lessonsintightropes · 02/05/2014 12:59

Abject apology here.

Surely the Beeb will have to sack him now?

OP posts:
Newpencilcase · 02/05/2014 17:46

I wrote this on the subject.

He knew exactly what he was doing as there is no excuse.

BoneyBackJefferson · 02/05/2014 17:54

newpencil

Why would I want to click on a link to what I suspect is your blog?

Nomama · 02/05/2014 17:56

Hold on a moment...

... so you are all married to men who never, ever say/think anything that is even slightly non PC?

You have all married men who never, ever think about stereotypes, good or bad?

You have all married men who never ever act, or have ever acted, in a remotely blokish manner?

Well I think I disbelieve you! You see I didn't say many of us had married men just like Clarkson, I said many if us will be married to men who act a bit like his telly persona, from time to time. I am honest enough to say that mine does. I understand why he does and I understand that it this thinking is something he recognises as something that needs to be questioned. He does question it, that is why he is occasionally embarrassed by himself, without any need for finger pointing etc.

He was brought up in a family that was very working class, very male oriented, women worked in the home, kept house and kids etc. Foreigners were referred to in words we no longer use, including the Fuzzy Wuzzies (as they haven't been mentioned yet). His grandparents loomed large in his childhood and his grand dad was a very Victorian man. I can't imagine that my DH is the only husband here with a similar background.

My point was that despite his early upbringing my DH fully recognises when he has a knee jerk reaction, and makes that mental adjustment. He doesn't deny his 'wrong thinking', he adapts and learns from it.

That, in my opinion, makes him a far more honest man than any of a similar age who insists he never, ever has such thoughts.

If you wish to see your menfolk as paragons of PCness, fair enough, But have the courtesy to read what I actually said rather than leap on the soundbite!

itwillgetbettersoon · 02/05/2014 17:56

I didn't know the word slope could be offensive depending on how it is used. I've never heard it being used except in this thread!

Bunbaker · 02/05/2014 17:56

"I learned that rhyme with the N-word."

So did I - child of the 1960s. I wouldn't dream of saying it out loud now, but I still remember the rhyme. DD used to say it at primary school, but replaced the word with baby.

sarinka · 02/05/2014 17:58

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

motherinferior · 02/05/2014 18:04

Well, actually I'm not married but my partner doesn't use racist language, no.

We're not stuck in the era in which we grew up. Most of us have moved on a bit, really. To the point where - big surprise - we don't use the N word.

Topseyt · 02/05/2014 18:07

Whilst I learned the rhyme with the n-word and that is how I automatically recall the words to it. I was, however, discouraged from using the word by my parents when I was a child back in the 70s.

In the end we used to sing "catch a rabbit by the toe".

I knew a lot of people back then though who would not have given the n-word a second thought. They just used it. That was how I remember it being.

I remember at school reading "Tom Sawyer" and "Huckleberry Finn" where the n-word was used with free abandon (wonders if they have now been "sanitised") and it wasn't an issue. We were just didn't otherwise use it in regular conversation. I still have my own copies of those books. Should I bin or burn them because they are deemed offensive?? No.

It isn't a recent thing from Clarkson and I am another who thinks it is rather a "non-story". He can be a bit of an idiot, but I still love Top Gear and I am not about to change there.

Topseyt · 02/05/2014 18:09

.... and no, I don't use the n-word myself, and nor do I like to hear it around. Just see things in context.

CarrotIronfoundersson · 02/05/2014 18:12

Had no idea about 'slope' at all. You learn something new every day.

The rhyme was 'catch a pixie by his toe' when I grew up.

Clarkson is a professional knob. It's what he does best.

hazeyjane · 02/05/2014 18:14

Nomama, another one here married to a white middle aged man who seems to be capable of not slipping racist, disabilist, homophobic or misogynist remarks into his everyday speech!

I am surprised at people not knowing the term 'slope' as an offensive term, it is used a lot in films about the Vietnam war.

I hate the fact that, despite apologies, the BBC still let him peddle his 'oh I am just a bumbling white middle aged man, who can't help coming out with offensive horse shit' shtick.

Nomama · 02/05/2014 18:15

That was my point, motherinferior.

As I have tried to explain, my DH was brought up one way, occasionally has moments when his early training is his initial reaction, realises and edits himself.

He has never said the N word out loud but has blushed when realising that his momentary lapse brought him close.

TucsonGirl · 02/05/2014 18:18

They play the Elvis Costello song "Oliver's Army" on daytime Radio 2 and that contains the same word.

Nomama · 02/05/2014 18:19

hazyjane... read me back. I didn't say my DH uses the words, he doesn't.

He is just aware that sometimes his early upbringing means his first thought is not acceptable and that he is reverting back to his childhood. He is fully aware that his parents and grandparents were, like many of their era, extremely racist. He is also very aware that this racism was 'normal' in his early life and that, for some of his early friends and family members it still is the norm.

I find that level of self awareness a good thing. He knows he was brought up one way and has chosen to change that early training. Why is that a bad thing?

VivaLeBeaver · 02/05/2014 18:20

I'm more annoyed about the Slope comment to be honest. Of course they knew it was a slang term for a person from south east Asia. Otherwise why would the local be on the bridge which they'd just built? JC also knew he could get get away with it. They've actually admitted they were referring to the bloke as well as the bridge but just said they didn't know it was an offensive term! Really? They use a slang term to refer to someone from an ethnic minority and didnt think there was a chance someone might be offended by it?

If that's not casual racism I don't know what is. I'm suprised that more people on MN don't see that.

And I love Top Gear, its my favourite programme by far. I normally stick up for JC with his daft comments about shooting public sector workers, lorry driver serial killers, etc but the slope comment was just too much for me to defend.

I do agree though that the n word seems to be a mumble and I have no idea if he said it or not.

motherinferior · 02/05/2014 18:21

I have to say I'm shocked that he's even come close to it.

grovel · 02/05/2014 18:23

The other curious use of the N-word was "n**r in the woodpile". It was widely used. I'm not sure anyone really thought what they were saying - it was "just an expression". Times have changed and the word is unacceptable in any context.

OwlCapone · 02/05/2014 18:24

I'm amazed at the amount of people who didn't know 'slope' was offensive.

Why would I? I have never heard it used to describe an Asian person, thus I would have no reason to think it is offensive. To me a slope is an incline, nothing more.

OwlCapone · 02/05/2014 18:25

I asked DSs what they used in the rhyme and apparently it's spider. Which makes no sense as they don't have toes.

SoFishy · 02/05/2014 18:26

Oh come oooon. The man is an intelligent bloke who works in the media. For him to be casually racist by accident because he's just not aware of these things is highly unlikely. And what makes it worse is there has been a whole string of Clarkson/Top Gear-related dodgy racial stereotyping/racist comments that have had to be apologised for, and he keeps on doing it. Which very much makes it looks like he is a racist, doesn't like being told not to be and keeps doing it on purpose. If he wasn't, and it had really happened unwittingly, he would bend over backwards to be much much more careful. He doesn't.

Football is blokey but it is streets ahead on the anti-racism campaigning and sensitivity - if they can, the BBC and Top Gear can.

Jojoanna · 02/05/2014 18:29

I agree SoFishey the man has had far too many chances .

OwlCapone · 02/05/2014 18:31

How many of you have actually listened to the clip?

TheOriginalSteamingNit · 02/05/2014 18:32

nomama your husband sounds awful like a racist, to be honest! There is no laudable honesty about nearly saying nigger and then remembering not to. Only a twat would get close.

TinklyLittleLaugh · 02/05/2014 18:34

Clarkson's arrogance is just breathtaking. Another man who thinks he is above conforming to what society considers decent behaviour. I am actually watching with interest now to see how much further he tries to push it.

I hope his good mate Dave is just shitting himself.

hazeyjane · 02/05/2014 18:34

Nomama, I don't understand what you are trying to say really, sorry! My fil comes out with racist, homophobic stuff, I spent lots of time with my grandparents as a child, who had some petty 'Daily Mail' views on the world! I remember people calling each other 'spaz' or 'joey' as a kid, watched racist sitcoms and was surrounded by the casual racism and sexism of the early 70s - somehow I don't have an inner offensive dialogue trying to burst out of me like some alien face hugger Jeremy Clarkson, because I grew up and formed my own 'pc' opinions (pc = non insulting and offensive).