Family are piling pressure on. AIBU and a shit mum or is DS's early rising just 'one of those things'?

[TheOrchardKeeper]

My DM, DP and DGM all seem to think DS waking between 5-6 is ridiculous.

I tried:

Putting him to bed at 8-9 for a week(his usual bedtime is about 6), which just made him extra tired and he still woke at 6ish

Changing what food he ate for tea and making sure he wasn't hungry (he's 3 so could tell me but it was worth a try).

Cut his daytime nap, which he now doesn't have and hasn't for 6 months.

I've used controlled crying since he was a little toddler, which means he sleeps through most nights but doesn't stop the early waking.

Mixing up the bedtime routine in several ways over several weeks to see what happened (nothing changes usually, though the longer I spend putting him to bed the stroppier he gets so he just gets a 20 min 'warning' then it's quiet time during those 20 mins to wind him down a bit and bedtime is very quick or he plays up).

He still gets about 11 hrs so I don't think he's actually sleep deprived. He's well behaved in the day and shows no obvious signs of being tired (until after half 5).

AIBU to think this is just how some toddlers are and that my DM, DGM and DP just have unrealistic expectations? Or am I missing something/doing it wrong?

My DD (now 18 - it seems she was only born last week, so how is she old enough to drive?) has always woken at 6am right through from a baby.

No matter what time she went to bed. Of course if she was unwell she did sleep in but her normal routine is 6am and she's awake. And like me, once she's awake - she's awake. Cannot go back to sleep.

She now gets up at 7am and clears the kitchen up and puts the washing on etc. I hope she doesn't move out too soon!

Sounds lovely Revenge

Some children are early wakers. My 2 were until the last 3 years they have become later and later at sleeping!

I spent 4 days adding on half an hour each day, so from 6, to 6:30, to 7, to 7:30 to about 8. Was a bit fast I guess.

I agree that is too fast. It could work if you did it much more slowly. At the moment your dd is going to bed very early and that could be the main reason that he is getting up so early.

Adding another 'completely normal' vote here.

DD is now 9 and doesn't sleep past 0630. Until she started school it was 0530. Her bedtime is 2100 (she goes up at 2030 and reads for half an hour). If she goes to bed any earlier than that she wakes earlier.

Even on holidays when we regularly keep her up till 2300, if not midnight, she'll be up NLT 0700. I'm the same though. All these years of early waking means that I'm up daily at 0530 (if I go to bed at 2230) and 0630 if I go to bed at midnight. At least I get to choose the best sun beds!

You can't 'force' anyone to sleep longer than they need. No choice but to go with the flow really.

My Dsis 2 children are 5 and 3, they wake up between 5 and 7, normally around 6 most days.

Kids have different body clocks and sleep needs. Also having a regular sleep and waking schedule is good for them too.

Ds has never been an early riser, as a baby his routine was 10-10! Now he's 8 on school days it's 9 to 8. Weekends I could let him stay up all night and he'd get up 10/11 hrs later. I'm a night owl too. Have to be up for 6am some days but I'll always struggle to be in bed before 11pm. Hate getting up in a morning.

Thanks

I have two dc who wake early.

My now dd2 who is nearly 7 wakes between 6.30 / 7am. Doesn't matter what time she goes to bed.

DS is 5 wakes anytime for 5 / 6am. If I put him bed later then 6.30 / 7pm he becomes a stroppy little whatsit.

They have learnt to stay in bed listening to story CD's or reading/looking at their books until I get up at 7am.

Just one of those things I'd say. I've got 3 kids and all of mine have been 5-6am every single morning since they started to get a proper sleep pattern. Eldest is now 9.5 and heading towards a teenage sleep pattern, he will sleep till 7.30-8 if left alone. 7.5yo and 1yo are still stubbornly up at crack of dawn