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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think this IS an acceptable lunch for an 8 year old?

312 replies

Helenagrace · 21/04/2014 14:51

I'm helping a friend out today as she has twin 8 year old boys and she's moving house house tomorrow. I've had them since 8.30am and in my text last night I said I'd "drop them back before dinner - about 5.30?"

I've just given them lunch. They were offered: toast (with peanut butter, egg, pate (homemade mackerel) or cheese), oatcakes (with the same options), half a packet of crisps, tomato, cucumber and pepper, fruit and a piece of home-made chocolate and cherry brownie.

Both have had oatcakes with cheese (6 each) plus salad, a hard boiled egg, an orange, crisps and a piece of cake.

My friend rang to see if they were ok and she spoke to one of the boys. Then I get a text from her saying she's coming to pick them up as she "hadn't realised they wouldn't be getting a proper lunch". I sent a text back saying that we were eating our main meal in the evening and I thought they were too and I've just had the reply back "yes but that's not really much of a lunch is it?"

It's a perfectly acceptable lunch in my house. Does anyone want to ring social services and dob me in for starving my children?

OP posts:
NeedsAsockamnesty · 21/04/2014 17:40

Why are people rising to Janethegirl's bait?

Because I have already seen Harry potter several times,the TV remote is out of reach and under those circumstances I can't help myself

pinkyredrose · 21/04/2014 17:41

They have eaten no meat, might impact their brain development if they don't have meat every meal. And oatcakes sound very pretentious

wtf?

fuzzpig · 21/04/2014 17:42

Perfectly good lunch Confused YANBU, very ungrateful of her

whydidyoudothat · 21/04/2014 17:42

yanbu, how rude of your friend. I am confused by the bread comment, they were offered bread, it was toasted, but bread is bread right?

Pumpkinpositive · 21/04/2014 17:43

Pinky

She speaks only in jest. And she is a vegan.

Go me

Itsfab · 21/04/2014 17:44

Ignore Suzzie. She obviously has had a bump on the head Hmm.

Floggingmolly · 21/04/2014 17:44

tbh, it sounds like you threw a few random things together
Yes. A buffet, in other words. What in hell is wrong with that?

Gileswithachainsaw · 21/04/2014 17:44

:o @ needs

NK5BM3 · 21/04/2014 17:45

I think she was rude anyway, because you were helping her out and frankly, whatever you feed them should be fine (barring allergies etc).

Having said that, I'm used to hot lunch, so like today, friends of ours hosted us for lunch, and she produced a lasagne and a home made choc cake. And fruit.

If we had them over, it would have been something similar... Hot at least. But that's me. My kids have been on play dates and lunch have been sandwiches. Heck, we've been invited round to friend's house for dinner, and what was produced was sandwiches.

On that occasion, dh and I came home hungry - they are still v good friends of ours, but we don't eat there.

Marcelinewhyareyousomean · 21/04/2014 17:46

The lunch eaten was about 700 calories so absolutely plenty for 8 yos. Two slices of bread is around 200 cals, 6 oat cakes is about 300 (45 each). I don't get where friend is coming from.

Itsfab · 21/04/2014 17:46

Coffeetea - you sound rude too.

pinkyredrose · 21/04/2014 17:48

oh !!!! I get it now!

Itsfab · 21/04/2014 17:48

Must RTT before posting. Apologies Suzzie Blush.

BalloonSlayer · 21/04/2014 17:50

Gosh you need to tell her that if she wants to dictate what her children eat when someone is looking after them for her that she pays a childminder, "unless you think it was YOU who was doing ME a favour by letting me look after your kids for the day?"

steff13 · 21/04/2014 17:53

Maybe she was afraid toasting would damage all the vital bread nutrients? Easter Wink

If you were watching my kids all day, I would have probably given you money to order them something for lunch, as I would hate to put you to the trouble of making lunch after doing me such a big favor. Really, I wouldn't have complained if you had given my kids M&Ms and french fries for lunch. I wouldn't have loved it, but it's one day, it isn't going to hurt them.

LadyMud · 21/04/2014 17:58

Are these pretentious oatcakes, perhaps?
I guess they'll be eating those sandwiches for their tea/dinner/supper Grin

andsmile · 21/04/2014 17:59

It cetainly is - its the type of stuff we have most days toddler sized, child sized and adult sized!

Is she upset because they didnt have chips nuggets and beans!

Have you checked with her that she does actually know what they have been offered and eaten....or has she latched on to some throw away comment by one of her DC.

If my DS is at someones house for a playdate, I expect him to eat what he is offered and if he is hungry I top up when he comes home. He is there to play or in your case 'be looked after' not to gorge themselves on food of the mothers choice.

GatoradeMeBitch · 21/04/2014 18:00

Pointedly hand her the sandwiches back when she collects them - just so she knows she wasted her time for no reason.

mummytowillow · 21/04/2014 18:02

If you got my 7 year old to eat all that, I'd kiss you! Grin

She's an ungrateful madam!

Groovee · 21/04/2014 18:04

I want to know what happened when the mother turned up...

coldwater1 · 21/04/2014 18:05

She is very rude, should be grateful you fed her kids at all.

If my kids go to friends houses i make sure they are fed and watered before because i don't expect people to feed them for me, if they do end up eating there i am very grateful.

MoominsAreScary · 21/04/2014 18:09

Ive never tried mine with oat caks, might have to give them a try.

5mad, yep to the tomato sauce on fishfinger sandwich, its a must.

Im more likely to go a few days without something hot. I guess its just personal choice.

I think dropping off food was even ruder, I hope they don't eat them.

steff13 · 21/04/2014 18:12

Having said that, I'm used to hot lunch, so like today, friends of ours hosted us for lunch, and she produced a lasagne and a home made choc cake. And fruit. If we had them over, it would have been something similar... Hot at least. But that's me. My kids have been on play dates and lunch have been sandwiches. Heck, we've been invited round to friend's house for dinner, and what was produced was sandwiches. On that occasion, dh and I came home hungry - they are still v good friends of ours, but we don't eat there.

I'm not sure I get what the heating has to do with being hungry later? There is no logic to the notion that food is more filling if it's hot. I am just as full eating two pieces of cold leftover pizza tonight as I was last night when I ate two pieces of the same pizza hot, IYSWIM.

A sanwich can be just as filling as lasagna, it just depends on the sandwich. It doesn't depend on whether the food is heated.

weatherall · 21/04/2014 18:16

Why is no one putting the question in the context of the family moving house? Confused

To me this is the critical point.

Do other posters not remember what it's like to move house and have literally nothing in the kitchen the night before. Would this really not influence your opinion on this situation?

Honestly I'm really surprised.

5madthings · 21/04/2014 18:17

I have just had a fish finger sandwich for my dinner, yum yum! Grin