To have told dd to say this to the teacher at parents' evening?

[whysogrumpy]

She is in Y11 so a crucial year for her. She likes her English teacher but has told me several times that the lessons are noisy and that the teacher struggles to keep order. So I encouraged dd to tell that to the teacher herself and she did. Cue much embarrassed mumbling form the teacher followed by a promise to change the seating plan. Seems like it will be in effective to me.

Have recounted the whole thing to dp who has told me I have undermined the teacher and could not have expected more. What is the point of the school insisting that she attends these things if she is not allowed to speak? And, at her age, should she not speak for herself more?

AIBU? It was her issue - her results are still good so I'm not really too bothered -so I let her say it.

I think we're talking at cross-purposes, Gold.

I was trying to explain why I was a little surprised the issue is being raised so late in the day based on my personal experience.

I agree with you that it was appropriate for OP's daughter to raise this herself as I said in my first post.

I hope the teacher does reflect and seek advice/guidance if necessary. I would also escalate to HoD if there is no noticeable improvement after a week.

I think we're talking at cross-purposes, Gold.

Yes perhaps. I was talking from the perspective of a parent whose 17 YO wouldn't have been able to approach any teacher unsupported about a matter like this whatever their expectation but then I think you school may be very different from the one she was in for GCSE.

I would expect a 16 yo to raise these concerns themselves, supported by a parent if they felt more comfortable that way. They are actually in a better position to discuss it than their parents, as they are the ones in the room. I have had students come to me as Head of Faculty to express concern over the management and teaching of some classes, and I have always taken their concerns seriously. Usually, if there is really an issue, I am already aware of it, but students who are having their learning disrupted need to feel they are being listened to. It is hugely frustrating for them.

I am in FE and if students come to me with such concerns I too always listen to them.

I often suggest that they have a chat with the teacher and see if there is something they can all do together to make a difference. It is surprising that once told that this is possible they can be very creative with suggestions and really very reasonable.

The ones that can't take up such a challenge get different support. Those who are being unreasonable get a bit of a blunt response, I am afraid, but they all get listened to!

It is their learning environment, they need to feel they have some sort of say in it.... whilst taking on their share of the responsibility.

For example the very chatty boy who complained that he could never concentrate in my class got asked to identify the most chatty/distracting person in the class. He thought about it and apologised. He has been trying very hard not to be so distracting ever since!