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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To start a thread about brilliant partners

107 replies

sheriffofnottingham · 10/04/2014 13:23

I read MN a lot and (understandably, because it's a forum where people can have a good old moan) there's thread after thread about a partner being awful / unsupportive / generally dickish (I am sorry if you have one of those). AIBU to just stop for a minute and ask you to post 1 thing that makes yours brilliant and is just one of the reasons you love them?

I'll kick us off... DP is awsome because I hurt my shoulder at the weekend and on tuesday it was still hurting so he set up Game of Thrones on the tv in the bedroom brought me tea paracetamol and ibuprofen and then massaged it until his hands hurt.

Over to you Let's get some love in the room!

OP posts:

Discomama · 10/04/2014 14:10

This thread has made me sad as I am alone....however it has also filled me with hope

Blithereens · 10/04/2014 14:12

My DH is the kindest, most patient, most genuine man I have ever met. He totally accepts me with all my numerous flaws, and supports and encourages me in a way I have never known before. He is so passionate about the causes close to his heart, and so interesting, intelligent and well-read. He is talented in so many ways and yet the most incredibly humble person.

He does anything I ask him to do. He goes out of his way to make me happy and comfortable. He made a massive effort to seek help with some issues he had when I met him, and I know it was really, really hard for him but he did it and our relationship is solid as a rock now. I adore him and am frightened every day that something will happen to him. I couldn't bear it.

ephemeralfairy · 10/04/2014 14:13

My DP and I have just moved in together. I found the move very stressful and was very snappy and on edge. He was brilliant at defusing the situation and calming me down, while just getting on with it, including taking apart and then rebuilding all the flatpack furniture.

He makes me lovely dinners and makes me laugh. He's the first man I've ever really been love with.

ElleMcFearsome · 10/04/2014 14:14

Mine has supported both me and my DDs amazingly, whilst DDs DF was dying (very young). Was amazingly patient, accepted unblinkingly that I had no energy or emotional time for him whilst I was putting everything into trying to hold them together and has been the best husband and step-father possible.

Disco I'd given up on men when I met him. My track records wasn't good and yeah, I thought (still do tbh) that he's a miracle. Even nicer was how his family and friends all tell me that they're so pleased so see him so happy, so it must be a two-way street. Keep the faith

IHaveAFifthSense · 10/04/2014 14:19

Despite having recently posted about DP and I being stressed and arguing a lot, I have come to the conclusion that he is brilliant through all his grumpiness.

He's moody because he's tired, and he's tired because he works hard. He's very supportive and helps out does pretty much everything around the house.

I complain too much. I should be more grateful!

Nahmate · 10/04/2014 14:25

A lovely thread

I don't post much I'm more of a lurker!

My dp is brilliant, he's a 100% hands on dad, thoughtful and loving. He puts us (kids and me) before anything else.

Linguini · 10/04/2014 14:31

It is sad seeing so many posts about unloving OH's, but great to post on one about how FAB OH's can be!!

Mine is fab... tall, dark & handsome, sweet and funny, super intelligent, intuitive in bed, and he has a beard :)

Also, he always gives me the 'nicer' serving of dinner :)

nutcasenan · 10/04/2014 14:42

A hot water bottle with nightdress wrapped around it. Cups of tea in the morning with porridge in bed while listening to radio. Okay we are old but it might be why we have been married fifty four years in a few weeks time. However, lots of ups and downs during that time but looking after each other really helps. Lovely thread sherifofnottingham.

saintsalive · 10/04/2014 14:49

ooh, nutcasenan. Never noticed you before. [I tend to notice the posters older than me! ]

WilsonFrickett · 10/04/2014 14:53

Discomama better to be alone than settle for someone who doesn't help you be the best you can be

neontetra · 10/04/2014 14:53

Among other strengths, my dh is a fantastic dad. He plans loads of activities for dd, and is always playing and laughing with her, and so affectionate towards her. And he works incredibly hard to give her the best life possible.

nickEcave · 10/04/2014 15:00

Great thread! I met my DH when I was 17, I'm now 39 and I still can't believe I got so lucky, meeting my soul mate so young. He is the kindest, most reasonable man I know and far more patient with the kids than I am. As someone who had quite a selfish, bad-tempered, sweary dad growing up I am grateful every day that my children have him for a father. His washing up skills leave a great deal to be desired but he more than makes up for this by being fabulously attentive in bed but also not hassling me for sex during the 15 months I breast fed and was completely turned off. He also has lovely parents and I can honestly say I have never had a MIL complaint!

ScoopyDoo · 10/04/2014 15:00

Mine helps look for my mobile phone/car keys/glasses/house keys/wallet/mobile phone/gym card/work pass/house keys/mobile phone/sunglasses/did I mention the phone, and usually finds them, at least 2-3 times a week. When I lose more than one thing at once, he tells me to 'stand still and don't move' before I lose anything else and conducts a forensic search of the house. Yesterday I went to work with both mine and his car and house keys. He still thinks I'm the smartest person he ever met and doesn't mind when I get impatient with him for taking and AGE checking he's got everything before he leaves the house. I would have killed me by now.

MeadowHeartshimmertheFairy · 10/04/2014 15:00

My DP is nothing short of wonderful, he's restored my faith I men after vile XH and is so sweetly unaware of just how amazing and wonderful he is. He does 50% of all house related stuff and picks up the slack whenever I've got a big project at work that means I have to bring work home.

He's clever, he makes me laugh, he worries about me, has the same childish sense of fun as me and always pours me a glass of wine when I walk in the door. I've never had a partner who loved me so much and I know that I'm the luckiest woman alive so have him in my life.

schlurplethepurple · 10/04/2014 15:02

My DH is wonderful because I had an operation yesterday and he's looking after DD, bringing me lots of drugs and drinks, took DD to the shop to buy my flowers and frozen and is being lovely. But this is normal practice for him, he's pretty amazing to be honest I'm a lucky gal :)

Miggsie · 10/04/2014 15:03

DH and I have been together over 20 years.
We have been through me getting depression, me becoming disabled, numerous family crap (on both sides) and all sorts of things and we are still in love.
He cooks when I can't be bothered, he spends HOURS on the internet trying to find me clothes, swimsuits, handbags and underwear that I like, as I HATE shopping so very very much and would rather cut off my mouse hand than shop for clothes.

He put up with 3 years where my libido disappeared TOTALLY and now is enthusiastically energetic now my libido has returned and is making up for lost time...
He drives DD round to 300 events every year, sits through said excruciating dance, singing, music, acting events without wincing visibly (I know he hates them really).

He let me keep someone else's chickens in the house and cleared up their poo AND gave a cockerel antibiotics every day for 3 weeks plus carted very ill chickens and cats to specialist vets...well, I could go on but he is also the kindest man you could meet; secretly very soppy (I once caught him cuddling our ill chicken), and we have a real laugh together.

He says I am like a wolverine with a hangover which makes me interesting as opposed to the more conventional female virtues (of which I have none) which he says are dull.

skinnyflatwhitetogo · 10/04/2014 15:04

Also, he always gives me the 'nicer' serving of dinner

I love this ^^

When we eat out DP always offers me the best seat for people watching and general nosiness as to what's going on.

notthegirlnextdoor · 10/04/2014 15:04

He gets up with the girls (my kids, not his) to let me have a lie in once a week.

He makes me endless cups of tea and coffee.

Helps me with my Uni work when I'm struggling.

He gives me a kiss before he leaves the house, even if its only to nip to the corner shop.

He CLEANS and IRONS.

I could go on and on, my DH is amazing.

My ex never lifted a finger at home or with the kkds, barely acknowledged my existence and nagged constantly. Even now I'm blown away by just how much my DH mucks in and gets on with it.

HighwayRat · 10/04/2014 15:05

Mine has been with me since dd was in utero (not his biological child) he held mybhand through pregnancy, birth, he loves dd and treats her like a princess (real dad not that interested) he calls her his, and she calls him daddy.

He has been there with me through everything, lifted me up when I was down, has been my rock through my dx of ms, has lifted me off the toilet, mopped up my tears, and borne the brunt of my mood swings.

He works ft so I can stay at home with dd, he pays all the bills, he does more than 50% of the housework so I'm not under too much stress, he never has a lie in because I'm so tired all the time.

notthegirlnextdoor · 10/04/2014 15:07

Also he speaks fluent "notthegirlsnextdoor" and reads my moods incredibly well. I have bi polar disorder and he couldn't be any more brilliant in dealing with it and helping me.

Ex used to call me "psycho bitch, go neck some tablets"

meganorks · 10/04/2014 15:10

My DP is fantastic as he does nearly all the cooking! Tonight I am getting a Thai red curry so awesome that I don't bother ordering red curry in Thai restaurants any more as I always find it a bit disappointing!
He is also really funny, thoughtful and an excellent dad.

ChubbyKitty · 10/04/2014 15:19

Mine split his peanut butter kit Kat chunky last night into thirds so me and my friend could have a bit.

trashcanjunkie · 10/04/2014 15:51

Aaaaah, brilliant thread. I wouldn't know where to start. My dp is freakin' awesome, and I thank my lucky stars every single day that we found each other. He's kind, funny, intelligent, caring. He loves my kids, and they him, he's able to take criticism, he loves the same things as me, but has his own weird and wonderful interests - he is sensitive to the extreme, and knows immediately if something's wrong. He can cook, start fires in the rain, camp til he drops, he is so fucking sexy, and tattooed and muscly that I go weak at the knees thinking about him. He's an incredible lover. Did I mention how kind he is? I am utterly loopy about him, and he is about me!

WestieMamma · 10/04/2014 15:59

Mine is brilliant because his number one priority is me and the children. Always. Yes he stuffs up a lot sometimes but it's easy to forgive because I know he's always trying his best. He's told me many times that making me happy makes him happy.

sparechange · 10/04/2014 15:59

Mine is not only the most kind, considerate and loving man on this green earth, he is also smokin' hot and dynamite in bed AND good cook

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