to let my children sleep in their clothes?

[greenbananas]

It's a bad habit I've got into while we have been having building work done. We spent about three weeks without a washing machine, heating or hot water. But now, children sleeping in clothes has become a kind of routine. Putting them in pyjamas seems like a pointless hassle, when they are far more comfortable just going to bed in whatever they are wearing (minus shoes, socks and anything bulky).

Obviously, I remove anything that is food-stained or dreadfully dirty. They are only 17 months and 5 years old, so they are not very smelly yet (although my 5 year old is a bit muddy sometimes).

My children are loved and cuddled, and have plenty of play activities and attention.

My instinct says that it's okay to save on washing and stress by letting them sleep in their clothes. But sometimes I wonder if I am being borderline neglectful.

What do you think? AIBU?

I also believe you have to introduce good habits young so they have an idea of routine/cleanliness for when they are older.

DS changes into pj bottoms but often keeps his t shirt on - they're no different in style or fabric to his pj tops so just as comfortable. He has a bath and clean clothes in the morning for school and its a darn sight easier to do this than have an argument with him (he has sn) over it.

It is neglect. What do you think social services would think if they turned up and s child was in bed in school uniform?

How does it save on washing? Surely you just have to wash their sheets more often?!

Jenny bathing your kids, then putting them to bed in the next days uniform is fucking weird.

All to 'save time'? Get up 10 minutes earlier ffs.

That's what I do myself starfish, I just put some PJ bottoms on.

I must be more of a filthstrel than I thought.

DSs have a bath & fresh jammies every night.

No, I think I am pretty laid back on bedtimes and child hygiene - my two miss the odd bath here and there and don't have fresh PJs every night, but I think your approach is wrong for a few reasons:

• important to separate day from night, part of the routine - it's a self respect thing too - getting ready for bed, cleaning teeth, switching off mentally for the day

• PJs are comfy to sleep in, clothes are not. The thought of a little boy sleeping in school trousers is not on.

• respect for school uniform I think v important. Hang it up, clean it, wear it with pride. It's not for sleeping in.

(To those that have fresh PJs EVERY NIGHT - bloody hell, are you serious? That would be 28 sets of PJs being washed EVERY WEEK in a family of four - for the love of the planet, stop having fresh PJs every night!)

I know about the fresh pjs it's a bit ridiculous isn't it?

I need to stop that.

DP wears the same pair of shorts for weeks though, so he evens out the balance a bit.

My 15 month old has fresh pyjamas every night because he hates bibs so we just let him get breakfast all over his pyjamas and wash them.

A pp said about how when her own mother did this that she felt unloved. To me that would be my main issue apart from the gut feeling of it not being right. Every night I put dd in clean pjs after her bath and do what ever I can to make her feel cherished. She goes to sleepclean and cosy and to do less than that would make it seem like I couldn't be bothered. It is such a small thing to do to show you care, I find it extremely hard not to judge. Yabu.

I know of a few parents who do not bath their dcs in the night. They just change into their nightwear wearing the underwear they have had on all day. I think this is gross.

If you do not set high hygiene standards for your children now, they will cut corners as adults.

There are plenty of adults who lack in personal hygiene - not washing hands after using the loo (seen it plenty of times at work), not changing their clothes everyday, not bathing everyday, have their dogs/cats poo in the house or roam around the kitchen where food is prepared. Nine times out of ten, their parents failed to teach them basic cleanliness.

I would not eat from such people or visit their homes.

Nightclothes are there for a reason. They are designed to be looser fitting that day clothes, and of different fabrics to make them more comfortable.
That's why they exist. I used to be a nightwear designer. Daytime clothes are stiffer, have less give and are often more rigid. Nightwear also conforms to safety standards in case of fire, which daytime clothes don't have to.

I would never put dd to bed in clothes she'd worn all day. She would be grubby and uncomfortable

Surely there is a risk of skin disease if you sleep in the clothes you have worn all day? You have sweated into them, there are bacteria and other nasties, and they will thrive and multiply in your body creases if the clothes aren't changed.

yup only very rare if we been out late ds3 may just get shoes/splints/trousers removed and into bed tshirt-pants if asleep as otherwise if woke he be up all night but be bath in morning

otherwise its pjs on )????

Given that kids of that age tend to wear soft comfortable clothes anyway, I can't see what the problem is. In my husbands country nightclothes don't exist. The children get filthy playing outside all day, and scrubbed clean before bed and put in tomorrows clothing, then they are conveniently clean and dressed and soon as they get up!
I would say do whatever works for you, as long as they are clean it's no-one elses business!

I can't honestly see how changing out of school clothes and putting pyjamas on can't be done if you are having building work? What possible benefit can it be to sleep in grubby hot clothes? You still have to wash the uniform? So surely you could get more wear out of the uniform if it was taken off at night!!? This is honestly one of the strangest ideas I have ever heard of. It doesn't seem lazy as there doesn't seem to be a benefit, lazy would be not bothering with school (!) but does seem a bit horrid.

I wouldn't do it, and I see the OP now agrees.
Tiny babies - yes, they get changed when they need it and day and night become fairly irrelevant
Older children need changing.
Exception would be early morning dash to airport, in which case I say it sounds very sensible :)

I have never done this with my two dd's.
I never had proper pajamas as a child and I remember wearing my day clothes in bed and feeling sticky and uncomfortable.
So even if I'm going out for the day where I know I will be back late and my dd's will fall asleep in the car, I take sets of pjs with me so they can get changed wherever they are.

My DC don't bath every night - they shower after swimming and have maybe 2 or 3 other baths in the week
DS is 7 and I plan that when he restarts school in September he'll shower every morning as we do. Until then 3 or 4 times a week is fine :)

Meh... I bathed twice a week as a kid and regularly slept in my clothes, so did my sisters. And we grew up in a rural area so I would imagine we were pretty filthy. We did not feel unloved or uncared for or neglegted.

We were happy and care free. I concede that it is possibly a personality trait and some people would find it neglectful. But I've never given it much thought until this thread came up.

And I have to add that none of us had or has skin diseases or any other related illnesses.

What some on here would probably find more shocking; is when we were in boarding school (high school) we used to sleep in our school tights and white long sleeve school shirts. Then in the cold mornings (no heating) we would just need to add tie, dress over shirt and shoes.

Disgusting... Technically I should be a filthy person from these experiences, but I'm not.

I agree with most that the OP is being unreasonable. I am fairly lazy but ds always put pyjamas on every night (although we use them For 2 or 3 days) and I have also tried to get into the habit of changing 4 week old dd into a 'nighttime' babygro, even though at that age they don't need to really.

However, this whole clean pyjamas for everyone every night and a bath every night being nothing less than absolutely essential no wonder this planet is going to the dogs! Kids that age do not need a bath every night (In fact ds's eczema started clearing up when we stopped bathing him daily) nor do they need clean pyjamas. They are not going to get skin diseases or whatever for 3 day old pyjamas and a twice a week bath!

a few times dd has gone to bed in her clothes when shes fallen asleep in the car and we've lifted her into the car, but every night? I'm sorry to say I'd be judging you.

No I wouldn't. A few times when the dd's have fallen asleep in the car I've stripped them down to tshirt and knickers but very rarely.
Pyjamas are designed to be more comfortable than clothes and are generally made of breathable fabric, predominantly cotton.
In addition I'm not sure you'd be saving on washing, clothes which had been worn all day would transfer grime to the bedding surely?