to have shouted at these teenagers in the street?

[bluebeanie]

I don't live in the best area, but still. There was a group of about 9 guys hanging around my street just now making a fair bit of noise.

I watched them for a bit in the dark upstairs bedroom and then suddenly one was on my drive approaching the car. I saw red and opened the window. I shouted, 'What the f do you think you are doing? The guy responded that he was checking out his reflection in the window. I said that I've got a sleeping baby here (true, but in the back room) and to p off or I'd call the police. I then slammed the window shut and called them anyway. The Police never really come for that sort of thing anyway and I never saw them.

Anyway, they left soon after, but I'm half expecting to wake up to my tires slashed or my paintwork keyed. It's not a fancy car (Hyundai i30). God, I'm shaking. It's not a usual occurrence thank god. I'm usually timid. Hell hath no fury like a mum, I suppose.

Do any MNers personally know of a large group of teenage boys who hang about in the streets at night who are up to some good

Nope - esp. not if they are wandering onto driveways. The kids who hang about at night in large rowdy groups are the kind of kids who are usually well known by the other kids as being troublemakers.

They're hardly likely to be Scouts, are they, looking to do a good deed for a neighbour or selling cookies

OP, hope you're feeling better now. I would keep a light on all night if you're alone just in case but I'm a bit paranoid about this sort of thing since the above nearly-burgled-incident

Checking out his reflection? In the dark? I'd be inclined to think he was checking out the car.

I think your adrenaline was probably racing which caused you to be a bit shouty. Years ago when DH and lived in a downstairs flat with no off street parking, I went out and asked a teenage girl to move off my car - she was sitting on the bloody bonnet of my brand new car! - I was icily calm and polite and she sort of muttered and slouched off with her mates. I was paranoid all night that they'd come back and key the paintwork but it was fine.

I just don't understand why "what the fuck do you think you're doing" is acceptable based on snap judgements. You probably wouldn't shout that out of the window if a guy in a nice suit was approaching your car. Up until you discover it's just a young lad acting like cock of the walk, surely 'can I help you' would have had the same effect? After all, knowing they've been seen is normally enough to deter wrong uns.

There are lots of teens who hang about the streets here in London, especially during the Summer nights.

They can be noisy, but often if you go out and have a polite word they're mortified at the thought they might be disturbing young children.

Selfishly they often don't think about how far the noise carries and that younger kids might be in bed.

Yes, sometimes you'll get attitude and abuse from them but at least give them the chance to be polite instead of lowering yourself to the behaviour of a Jeremy Kyle guest.

You dident need the bad language op, I understand you were scared but you probably antagonised them. I would gave just called the police.

You probably wouldn't shout that out of the window if a guy in a nice suit was approaching your car

If a group of men in suits were hanging about my street at night making a noise and approaching my car to 'check their reflection' they would get exactly the same response. In fact, I'd probably be more inclined to think they were up to something serious and would phone 999 as well.

I think you could have been polite first. Think if they were up to no good you would have really got their backs up.

Why did you call the police? Just because they stepped on your drive?

I forgot to mention I heard the other guys counting the guy down on drive down. Why, I don't know. It doesn't sound nice though and I panicked. As I said, I'm usually shy. I have a baby and if it was me on my own, I would've done anything. It's just something took over. I've got more than myself to protect. I was petrified.

I've lived in some really crappy areas and I still don't make the assumption that all groups of teens are up to no good. In my experience, decency often begets decency.

A friend of mine walked past a group of teens with her buggy yesterday. One started calling after her. She started walking quicker and the teen jogged to her. Turns out her little girl had kicked off a shoe.

If they were in the street then I'd have a different view. But on your driveway they're on private property and so fair enough to tell them to go away. The swearing maybe not perfect but this guy wasn't on a public road, admiring his reflection in her car window, he was on private property (the OP driveway) without good reason.

Usual MN crap. I'm sure in reality most people would challenge some yob they caught wandering around on their driveway.

Well I wouldnt like it. Might not be everyones choice of words.

If the OP had increasingly felt intimidated (rightly or wrongly) then it seem like it just burst out in that fashion. I dont think she sat there planning it.

9 people at night right next to and on your property isnt great is it.

Exactly Suacy. I wouldn't be asking said yob if I could assist in him any way.

The swearing came before OP found out he was there without good reason. Once OP knew he was on her drive without reason, I can understand why she was less than polite but there are just too many scenarios in which the lad could have been being a perfectly decent human being. Or even just a cocky teen harmlessly showing off. Neither really call for how she spoke to him.

Yob? 9 people on driveway?

SirChenjin - 'can I help you' is often used as a very pointed expression to ask why a person is imposing. I am certainly not suggesting that the OP should have offered a favour

FFS so he's a yob now for checking his reflection in a car window? hmm

I hate ageism with a passion and it seems to be alive and well on MN lately.

If it had been a group of women around the OP's age, I'm sure she would have been far more polite in telling one of them to get off her driveway.

But a group of teenagers are fair game to shout and swear at it would seem.

The counting down thing is weird.

Swearing wasn't the best plan - you could have retained the moral high ground simply by asking what they were doing.

But they shouldn't have been there.

In the past year, DH has had his car vandalised once and broken into once so I understand your concerns! I probably would have waited to see what he did once at the car. I probably wouldn't have sworn at them but I don't think you were entirely UR.