To think NHS do gooders need to realise that the patient is not always right

[oggieogggie]

I've had a right few weeks of it. I'm an auxilliary nurse and my morning normally starts by taking breakfasts around the ward. Picture the scene if you will - a trolley full of cereal, bowls and milk and a pot of hot porridge.

I walk into room one = "would you like breakfast this morning?" patient (full mental capacity) says "well before all that I'd like you to fix my TV. I cant get the channel to turn over." I say "well I'll see to that after breakfast, would you like some cereal?" he says "not until my TV is fixed ... can't you just do it, it will only take a minute (so everyone else should wait until YOUR TV is functioning before they get their breakfast and you don't see that as selfish at all?) I don't say this - I remain professional.

Imagine a few more patients who decide that their TV/Slippers/Laptop chargers etc are more important and then the unfortunate patients who receive cold porridge as a result -

Next I take a tray of hot toast around = One patient demands "I want it buttering and cutting into thin strips." I explain that she will either have to press the buzzer for someone else to come and do it or wait until I have finished delivering toast before it gets cold. "But I want it NOW!" she demands. Ok, so it's fine that everyone else will receive cold toast? that's ok with you is it?

Imagine more of the same throughout the day

"I can't get my phone working!" = well I'm taking care of a rather ill patient at the moment, it will have to wait." "that's it!! I'm making a complaint!!"

"I want you to wash me." = "I will help you but you have to wash what you can yourself." = "why?? its what you get paid for!!!" no actually - I get paid to help people back to independence and to care for those who genuinely can't do it themselves ... " - "Ive had no sleep!! I want you to wash me! I can barely move I'm in so much pain!!" (well walking down the stairs for a fag 10 minutes ago must have been agony then eh?)

I'm sorry, but could it not be said that sometimes, just sometimes certain patients are not always right and that as staff members we should not live in fear of one of these people complaining that we're not jumping through hoops to keep them happy? And no I've never had a complaint against me - I do that nursey thing of taking the abuse and maintaining a smile. Just lately I can't quite shake the notion that the NHS (and Britain in general) is so bothered about political correctness and ultimate customer satisfaction that it's actually counter productive. Why are we all so polite??!

I've now left the NHS for a while because I can't cope. I wish I could. I hope I can go back to it with an open mind, and perhaps find a place where I can use my skills and do what I went into nursing to do.

I am so so sorry to those who have experienced bad care, and I'm sorry for those nurses who feel let down, run down and abused.

I wish someone would help us.

But no-one is listening.

There will always be room for you in the sluice , nurseywursey .

Take good care of yourself .

The thing is if the auxillary isn't going to butter the toast who is?

I was on a short staffed ward after ds2 was born. It was hideous. No-one would empty my catheter (I did ring the bell as it looked like the bag was about to burst), luckily my mum appeared and did it for me as no-one else would. I also had a drain and was expected to walk with catheter and drain to a shared table for breakfast. I just didn't bother - didn't think it was very nice for the others. On one occasion when the midwife was emptying the catheter she spilt it all over the floor and left it. I cleaned it up Also on that stay my drug rounds were missed - ended up in agony - a midwife found me and hit the roof with her colleagues.

I've also been visiting on geriatric wards where an old lady of 96 was screaming in agony with a broken hip and no-one was dealing with her at all. It was horrendous. She was upsetting all the other oldies as well. My mum (again my mum- she is a nurse) ended up going over and holding her hand and talking to her to try and calm her and give her some care, then tried to find someone to give her some drugs.

I've seen chaos. I don't blame the frontline staff, but the patients were receiving substandard care. The politicians and hospital managers should do a month of shifts each.

I think post natal wards are a special circle of hell, tbh.

I have a daughter and really don't countenance the idea of her being in one of those. I'd rather she went abroad.

My only experience is as a live-in parent/carer to a child with cancer, and I mean, live-in, as she had a form of leukaemia that meant all in-patient treatment and months of strict isolation and as a result, she was never in a shared bed bay or any place else but onco unit besides a private room in ICU.

We parents took nappies, bed pans and paper urinals to the sluice room unless the patient was in source isolation, fetched meals, changed bedding, learned infection protocol, all sorts.

On the whole the care was good in the onco unit and we parents learned how to do a lot of things if we wanted but again you developed a longer relationship with staff due to circumstance.

Some of the juniors, gawd, I honestly felt sorry for DD1's consultant.

IMO they are too young and medicine should be a postgrad degree with a minimum age to be in contact with patients unless some extraordinary maturity is shown.

I'm sorry Nurserywursey that you've had to leave your job because of incompetent politicians and management.

It really is criminal what they have done, institutional neglect on a massive scale. I can only hope things get better as it can't get much worse now.

And after what I've read on here I'm grateful that my mother is in one of those pilot scheme areas where they are encouraging the elderly to get care at home (and funding it).

You're right, I am just questioning how bad it actually has to get before something gets done.

Didn't they learn anything from the Francis Report?!

I honestly thought when the recommendations were made there would be changes. The government ignored the ones that really mattered.

A recent whistleblower had to go into hiding because she was going to tell all about the coding in hospitals, they were being told to document things to show the hospital in a better light. The whistleblower got no support, was dragged through the mud.

This is what happens when people speak up

And after what I've read on here I'm grateful that my mother is in one of those pilot scheme areas where they are encouraging the elderly to get care at home (and funding it)

That's brilliant, I hope it works out. Will she be having home carers do you know?

My mum whistleblew about patient safety in the community. She had a very hard time of it nursey. The person complained about was promoted (and is causing chaos in her new job - presumably she'll carry on being promoted until somebody dies).

The NHS management is toxic to the core imo. They didn't hesitate to cover up - it was laughable.

I wish I could say it was a rare occurrence, that's absolutely disgusting saintlyjimjams. Someone like your mum has the strength to stand up and speak out, and gets shot down.

It's no wonder people bury their heads in the sand and try to ignore. Then the bad care gets that ingrained it's set as a standard.

Whilst in hospital seriously ill, I saw some upsetting episodes of neglect, unsafe practice and simple unkindness. However I also saw the best of human kindness and this was very often from the porters and auxiliary nurses. I think if you are getting fed up regularly and unable to rise above or use gentle humour and kindness to manage seemingly demanding patients it is either time to discuss staffing, have a break or change jobs. Working in an hospital can make even the very best jaded after a while, especially if it is understaffed. I hope you are OK.

www.wbhelpline.org.uk/

Nursey - If enough people blow the whistle it will eventually become obvious who the bullies are. They can't keep passing the buck forever.

Are private hospitals better? Depends

A friend had a hysterectomy in one. She was in a private room and after the operation they brought her water on her request. The nurse put it on a table out of reach and left. My friend was left for hours with nothing to drink, unable to reach the water, and nobody coming near her.

Nursey it wasn't just my mum - 3 colleagues spoke up & were supported in writing by a doctor. Doctor complained to the chief exec. Doctor was told to keep his nose out, all 4 nurses were bullied and - well you wouldn't believe it. I wouldn't if I hadn't been there. They did think that raising concerns as a group would mean they were listened to. They weren't. The person complained about & promoted was caught lying in writing about my mum - she told her bosses 'she didn't mean it' & they accepted that. Similar things happened to each member of the group.

You're right it's not unusual. My mum has had quite a few people come up to her & tell her that they admire what she did, they agree, they have their own concerns, but having seen what happened to her & her fellow whistleblowers are too scared to report themselves.

As my mum says she older, she's near the end of her career, but if the younger nurses raise concerns they risk losing their whole career & livelihood.

My mum says she would do it again - even with all the personal stress & the non existent change. If anything happens she will know she tried. Funnily enough recently one of the things she complained about made the paper - someone there now obviously blabbed to the paper - and another nurse has now become a whistleblower. They tried the same shite on her but she is married to someone fairly powerful & has hit back. Had they acted on my mum & colleagues complaints then they wouldn't be in the paper & they wouldn't have another whistleblowing case to try & cover up.

Sorry all a bit off topic, but just to add support really to the frontline staff & to say that I'm well aware the rot comes from above & that most people are doing what they can & are aware & upset when patient care is not what it should be.

Horsetowater - it's obvious who the bullies are in my mum's case. My mum & colleagues raised a grievance after the bullying that arose after whistle blowing. It was a whitewash. The investigators had to work hard to make it one, but they did.

Often people come & tell my mum when they're about to leave as they can't bear working for the person concerned anymore. She asks them all to write to the RCN with their concerns when they do. The RCN have been fairly useless as well - but they can't keep ignoring the same management name being raised. She also asks them to fill in anonymous feedback forms (which did work as those made their way to the paper... Would love to know who blabbed).

The RCN are useless. They didn't protect me when I blew the whistle and I was stitched up like a Kipper by the then male heavy corrupt ward management. Theft of drugs, assault and racial abuse of patients, manipulation of the shift enhancements to favour their cronies, dissappearing to the pub holding the bleep, sleeping on duty, rostering supernumary student nurses, using the locked door policy to manage staff shortage even though it was unlawful -all reported, all witnesses and ultimately covered up.

Three of the male charge nurses actually broke into one of the others office and pissed all over his chair, blaming it on a patient.

That was what we were talking about- that level of behaviour.

This is draw-droppingly shocking, it truly is.

It's happened in social services as well. Anywhere where the victim is vulnterable - a child, or a sick person. Their needs aren't met due to poor management/politics and those who fight to defend them, the victims only defence, are simply bullied out by the people desperate to keep their jobs but with a higher tolerance of incompetent work.

It's completely dysfunctional

If I told you the rest you'd have a conniption Horse and it'd probably out me.

It has taken me 14 years to get over what happened to me because of whistleblowing- well 14 years to stop having thrice weekly nightmares that is. What happened to some of the patients was much much worse including several suicides that happened directly because of staff not bothering to do checks, enforce risk management and then going on to alter records and cover up.

www.wbhelpline.org.uk/

Hopefully things are changing now Kudzugirl.

Not sure what a conniption is though, best leave that to the experts.

Whenever I read stories like yours kudz I know you're not exaggerating because I saw what happened to my mum. The management culture in the NHS is rotten. And these things will keep happening until it changes.

I think we've lost our way with the concept of 'public service'. That terms is something old people like me understand but it seems to be completely missing with the world of targets, gradings, star listings and outsourcing.

You can't call something a public service when shareholders are involved. The two don't go together, and you can't call something a public service when individuals put their status or income before their duty.

No I am actually underplaying it Saintly. I ended up very unwell for a long time because of the way I was treated. I had my work sabotaged (whole records and CPA documents removed) in an attempt to frame me for 'failures' in my care but fortunately I anticipated this and kept copies of everything which in itself makes you so anxious. One other nurse made an anonymous report backing me up and saying they had recorded the ward manager say 'they were going to get that cunt' (me) on their mobile phone. That nurse is somebody I will be eternally grateful to.

I am sorry that happened to your Mother too. It was hell, still is sometimes because all people see you as is a grass, not as somebody adhering to her code of conduct and reporting the abuse of patients.

I will call that helpline Horse as I would like to talk to somebody who understands what it is like. I will never really get over it. Never.

Yep. And spending millions on management consultants. I saw one report from a management consultant comparing the 'best' & 'worst' district nurses. The 'best' saw 18 patients a day, the 'worst' saw 6. Their logic was that if they could turn the 'worst' district nurses into the 'best' then they could lay off a load of them & save money.

BUT there didn't seem to have been any consideration given to the jobs the so called worst & best were doing. It wasn't mentioned in the report I read. The so called worst might have been doing complicated dressings & syringe drivers. The so called best might have had a list of diabetics & flu jabs.

This is how stupid the people making decisions in the NHS are.

I think you have a point oggie, but I too have had medical problems because of inappropriate or unsympathetic care. And I have witnessed auxiliaries routinising their jobs leaving people unfed and in one memorable case, quite literally starving. It's very difficult from both sides.