To be more than annoyed when people inform me my children need a good smack?

[Slightlyneuroricnat]

It really winds me up.
Not so much the oldies who say " in our day I would have a got a whack for that " but people that can see I'm already having a tough time dealing with 2 toddlers, my eldest daughter is going through a phase ( I bloody hope ) of hitting everyone including me and we always have the same conversation, I don't hit you and you must not hit mummy, you've hurt me and now we are going home.
So we had this yesterday in a park and a lady informed me that I was " wishy washy " and what she actually needed was a good smack herself.
Am I being unreasonable to think she is an ignorant fool or am I some kind of martyr as I don't believe in hitting children?

[slithytove]

Everyone has the right to live their lives without threat or fear of violence. Man, woman, child, animal.

I believe I have made this clear in my posts throughout the thread yet it has been ignored.

We all have a right to use reasonable force if we feel personally threatened to DETER the person physically threatening us from doing so. Some feel that extends to shooting a man in the back when he is running away, I feel that this is clearly not a deterrent but a punishment, however would have no problem whatsoever with doing so should I happen to have a gun handy and someone bigger and stronger than me posed an immediate, serious, physical threat to me and my family.

Your children therefore share this right. I wonder how you would react if one day they hit you. Right now, you are that bigger, stronger person posing an (admittedly not serious) physical threat to your children.

[slithytove]

Italics fail :(

[Aventurine]

I start hitting my mum back when I got to about 14 after being hit regularly throughout my childhood. It would then just degenerate into a physical fight. Happy days!

[Aventurine]

started

[Ilikepancakes]

I was smacked as a child: it certainly didn't make me repentant just angry, I plotted revenge on my dad for hitting me. It made me more likely to hit my sister; if dad could smack me then I could smack my sister if I thought she deserved it. I'll never hit my kids.

[catkind]

I'm not sure why you're asking for alternative methods fefifo, as you said upthread you already use lots of alternative methods. But go on then. How about time in? How about taking child aside, getting down to their level and explaining sternly why what they did was wrong? How about offering a choice of suitable alternatives for a dangerous action? ("It's not safe to run by the road. Do you want to walk or be carried?") How about withdrawing your attention? ("Hitting isn't kind. I don't want to play with you if you're hitting.") How about leaving a fun place if they're not behaving suitably? How about explaining why something is dangerous and preventing them from doing it instead of waiting for them to try to do it and then punishing them? ("Stay away from the oven, it's hot." "It's not safe to run by the road. You need to hold my hand now.")