...everything in the list below?
I thought I'd get everything out in one thread.
-Dresses with only one arm. You see them at award ceremonies and stuff but they look silly. I think of them as bowling dresses because the only practical point I can see to them is that it must help your bowling to have your bowling arm unencumbered by sleeve.
-People who walk too slowly. Just get out of my way! I've got stuff to do!
-People who walk to quickly. Calm down and stop jostling past me. I don't care if you've got stuff to do!
-People who start an answer to your question by sucking air through their teeth in an attempt to make it seem like their response will be truly earth shattering.
-People who think of animals as their babies. Even worse are those that dress them up in human like clothes. Get a grip women! (And I do mean women because it is only women who put bonnets on cats)
-Decorated cars. They look shit. If a VW Beetle looked so great red with black ladybird spots and eyelashes then VW would make them like that. They don't because they look shit. You're not being wacky, you're being a twerp.
-Kitchen utensil drawer. Why are they made to jam shut? Why is that thought of as a useful feature?
-Idiots that take pride in not being able to function. "I can't use a computer!" "I always avoid those self checkouts!" "It took me 5 days to put together an IKEA spoon rack!". It's a bad thing that you can't do it, not good.
-Netmums. Humourless establishment prissy doily-using maiden aunts.
-Precocious children. Yeah, but can you drive? Can you? Can you? No! because you're a child!
-Ian Hisplop/Jeremy Hardy/etc. Every silver lining has a cloud. Negative negative negative. They say everything is crap and if it's not (Olympics for example) it's quietly forgotten. If a scientist were to find a cure for cancer, they would bang on about how the scientist once got a parking ticket, "Shamed drug scientist" they would call him. And if they know everything about how to run things to make the world a better place, why don't they?
-Comedians who talk about the royal family being "German". Very lazy and xenophobic. Her family came here over 300 years ago but they're still German?
-Orange juice with "Bits". Unless they specify what the bit are I'm not drinking it. Would you eat pasta that was advertised as containing "Things"?
People who say that everything was better in the old days. Actually, I think you'll find that before the 1970s at least 50% of children were shoved up chimneys or down t'pit where they died of cholera, polio, mal-de-mare, plague, dynasty, smallpox and elfshot. Now that sort of thing doesn't happen in the South of England.
I should probably have a rest now for a bit.