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AIBU?

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Original poster

to wonder why it seems people get increasingly negative about breastfeeding the older baby gets....

455 replies

DiplodocusDinosaur · 14/03/2014 15:34

My ds2 is 9 mths, admittedly he is a very big baby and often mistaken for 1yr to 18mths. I bf on demand and have always happily, discreetly fed in public. Whereas when he was little I.e. under 6 mths I only ever got really positive comments and vibes for bf in public, now he is getting older I'm increasingly noticing negative looks and had the odd comment more than once. Today I took my ds1 and ds2 to a childrens farm, ds2 wanted a feed so I went to feed him and heard two mothers giggling and saying 'bitty, bitty'. And a week or so back another lady stopped in the country park I was in and told me ds2 was far to old for breast milk and it was fine for little babies to be bf in public but my baby was old enough to learn to wait.
Have i just had a couple of bad run ins or have others noticed bf reactions change as babies get older?

OP posts:
Thread gallery
6
blahblahblah2014 · 19/03/2014 13:12

Yes because men and women's nipples are viewed in the same way Hmm

IceBeing · 19/03/2014 13:13

you can see men's nipples all the time round here...

I saw a vast array of womens nipples in the swimming pool changing rooms....and more visible through thin see through material just generally out and about town...

Out of all of the times I have seen nipples on public display, before during and after BFing would have been the best time...and in spite of a year of coffee mornings with my antenatal possy, and a year spent peer supporting at BF cafes I have never actually seen a nipple in a BF context.

blahblahblah2014 · 19/03/2014 13:14

Well it wouldn't be much of a debate without me now would it! You all agree it's great to BF older children, and i don't. I think it's wrong, pointless and quite honestly gross - I think a lot of people feel that way, even if they dont know why.

IceBeing · 19/03/2014 13:15

sorry just lolling to myself here that women should be back to work by 6-9 months....

I went back at 4 months and am still BFing a 2.5 yo...

So you can probably guess how mutually exclusive I found work and BFing...

Eletheomel · 19/03/2014 13:16

I feel sorry for your son blah, what a twisted view of womens bodies he's going to develop growing up with your attitudes...

5madthings · 19/03/2014 13:16

In our society they are not, tho men can actually bfeed as well.

So you are horrified by women's nipples but nor men's, if you took close u pictures of nipples from men and women you wouldn't be able to tell which were male and which were female, esp without the aerola.

What are you afraid will happen if your son or husband sees a glimpse of a nipple as a woman feeds her baby.

I know plenty of teen boys who have seen women bfeeding, either their own mothers or friends, aunts etc. They don't seem bothered, it's a mum feeding her baby, nothing to be scared of.

blahblahblah2014 · 19/03/2014 13:17

Do you think it's funny that women who have children are expected to work then?

Or should they ensure they have a rich husband? Or should they be relient on poncing on my tax?

Eletheomel · 19/03/2014 13:19

My son will be 14 months when I go back to work, and no I don't have a rich husband, I saved up before I got pregnant. You are aware that women can take up to a years maternity leave these days????

blahblahblah2014 · 19/03/2014 13:20

Sorry, but YES men and womens nipples are seen differently, are you not aware of this? Whilst a man may go topless a woman is not allowed to.... Seriosly what a stupid comparison!

And my son is already grown up and he's just fine

blahblahblah2014 · 19/03/2014 13:21

a years maternity - Great to know what other people are funding

Eletheomel · 19/03/2014 13:21

Yeah, your son is fine unless the mother of his child decides to breastfeed.... (and then a whole load of demons will be unleashed)

ifyourehoppyandyouknowit · 19/03/2014 13:22

You aren't funding someone else's maternity.

The reason women's nipples are seen as different is because we are incapable of viewing breasts as anything other than sex toys.

Fusedog · 19/03/2014 13:23

But a lot of people will think for fuck sake so,me one get that 2 year old a beaker and a biscuit I am not repulsed by extended bf however it's just not nessarily for older children

So there for your wanting to do something that doesn't need to be done in public and will up set some for actual babies people do need to get a grip but for toddlers Who can EAT and don't need breast milk I can see why people don't want to see it

Eletheomel · 19/03/2014 13:23

'what other people are funding' - do you have any knowledge of maternity leave/pay in the UK? Maybe you should swot up before you reveal your ignorance in another area....

Eletheomel · 19/03/2014 13:25

fusedog why would people think ffs if someone is bfeeding a toddler? What impact does it have on them? And bfeeding isn't just about bmilk it's about comfort and security which is just as relevant to toddlers (maybe more so) as babies.

And nobody has to see it, as you don't need to look...

blahblahblah2014 · 19/03/2014 13:27

I'm not in the Uk

Eletheomel · 19/03/2014 13:27

thank fuck

blahblahblah2014 · 19/03/2014 13:28

and FWIW yes, taxes are used for state maternity pay, where do you think this money comes from?

Eletheomel · 19/03/2014 13:30

I'm currently on unpaid maternity leave, so it's not coming from anywhere...

blahblahblah2014 · 19/03/2014 13:30

So you are living on either no income, or someone elses?

Eletheomel · 19/03/2014 13:31

No, as I said before (if you'd followed the thread) I saved up before I got pregnant

Fusedog · 19/03/2014 13:34

poster Eletheomel

Most people manage to give there toddler those things with out bf

I just think it's become a bit political at 2 it's not a need so why not just do it at home

Then mother avoids being asked to go into I n the loo in some shop ECt and child avoids stares and tuts it's not like a baby were they need to have milk a toddler can blinking eat so give them a rice cake and wait until you get home

Eletheomel · 19/03/2014 13:39

fusedog how can bfeeding a 2 year old be political? Some toddlers will be happy to wait until they get home, others (I'm sure) are not, I'd rather someone quickly fed a 2 year old in a shop than it screamed and bawled the whole time.

On top of which, while you can certainly comfort a child without bfeeding, if you are still bfeeding a 2 year old, its quite common that they will still look to your breast for comfort, as that is what they have always had (a rice cake doesn't always cut it).

On top of which, what impact does it have on you?

ifyourehoppyandyouknowit · 19/03/2014 13:39

Breastfeeding isn't just about food. It's comfort as well, so it's not just a case of 'here, have a biscuit instead'. It's not political, it is nurturing a child.

HighlanderMam · 19/03/2014 13:40

Again all your 'blablabla'ing is just total wankstain opinion.

Oh, and here is the link again seeing as you reported my post.

This is what you said-

blahblahblah2014 Thu 13-Feb-14 16:05:01
Smoke in a car goes straight out the window (if the car is moving)

Not the case in a room

Nanny state alert!

From page 1 on this thread

You clearly state that you think when smoking in a car the smoke all goes out the window. Now do forgive me for never taking anything you ever post on MN seriously.

I didn't search for it, I remember reading it and looking at your username and thinking 'how apt, blablabla, that's just about right'.

Your subsequent posts on this thread have only cemented my thoughts.

Blah...

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