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found pictures of me on hubby's PC - don't know what to do.

428 replies

mummyinbonniescotland · 12/03/2014 19:55

Tonight I went onto hubby's pc. He works from home as a photographer. He had lots of pictures up. I closed down some of his folders, but as I was closing one down, I saw it was pictures of my privates (I was a bit absent minded so didn't pay much attention to what it was until I'd hit the x button)

So there were pictures of vaginas. I was a bit wtf? Then I caught sight of one of me, smiling, lower half naked, legs akimbo, on my couch, wearing clothes I recognise.

I don't remember ever posing like that or for pictures of my vagina.

Actually I have once, but that was a close up of a boil on my vagina that I wanted to take to my doctor's appointment (it was a recurring boil that was always gone by the time of the appt so dr had asked me to take a pic next time).

It was taken by DH on my phone and he handed it immediately back to me and I deleted it off my phone after the appointment which was that day.

So i have no idea where all these pictures come from. I'm quite a private person, and I'd never pose for pictures unless like I said above to take a picture to my doctor.

I'm confused and digusted right now. My DD could have come across this, or my hubby's colleague who often comes to the house, or my very prudish parents.

I did confront DH who says he has no idea where the pictures came from, he doesn't remember me posing either apart from that dr appt one. He did a search and couldn't find the folder I closed. I wish I hadn't closed it but I wasn't paying much attention til the last second.

He did keep asking me to go and fetch his phone, cos he was running late for an appt with a client but now its going through my head, did he want me gone so he could hide the evidence?

I have come across porn videos before and porn sites in his internet history which he keeps saying is a virus/pop ups etc. I have never really believed him but I kind of let it go I admit.

This is different though. These are pictures of me that he appears to have taken. To perhaps look at in his own time? But I don't remember posing for them and I never would either. Even if I had, I would have expected him to delete them immediately, not leave them on the PC for someone to come across such as DD.

I just feel dirty and disrespected. I don't know what to do. I've been with him for 16 years now, married for 9, he's my best friend and I know he's never been with anyone else - I do know where he is all the time (he works from home, my parents live in the same street, we have mutual friends).

I don't know what to do, please help!

NC for this

OP posts:
Comeatmefam · 12/03/2014 21:54

I don't know whether this thread is bullshit or not (but as ever people should never give away any personal info they would be upset to have shared if it turns out to be a hair handed wanker < literally) BUT:

My sister sent a pic of an injury/bruising to her doctor following surgery on her chest so it can and does happen!

And I also know of a man who manipulated pictures of his partner and posted them on porn sites.

WorraLiberty · 12/03/2014 21:58

I've been asked to take photos of stuff to the docs, things that flare up and go away by the time you get an appt

Yeah but the appointment was the same day as the photo was taken

Koothrapanties · 12/03/2014 21:58

Oh dear op. I hope you get some answers. You cannot let this go.

LadyBeagleEyes · 12/03/2014 22:00

I doubt a Doctor would ask for a picture of a vaginal boil though. If I was asked I would refuse as would, I think, the vast majority of women. It's just weird.

TheBody · 12/03/2014 22:01

I don't think and have never heard of a doctor asking for pictures of a female patients vagina. I was a nurse for years.

mummyinbonniescotland · 12/03/2014 22:06

he's home. I screamed. I cried. I hit him. I threw things.
He's admitted to the porn. Says he has a high sex drive. He gets 'frustrated' and it helps him release stress after a hard day at work.
Says he does respect me, he's so so sorry. But he's not as upset/apologetic as I was expecting, hard to explain really.
He denies all knowledge of the pictures of me. He doesn't know how they got there and can't find them.
So now we are in silence. I'm still unsure of what to do and need to give myself more time to think. I've told him DD is sleeping with me and he's in her room as I can't have him near me. DD will be confused :(
I've had so many bad things happen to me over the years and the last person I thought would hurt me was my DH. :(
I don't know if I can trust him or love him like I did an hour or so ago.
I just need to think it all over :(

OP posts:
BolshierAyraStark · 12/03/2014 22:06

Yes OP , please do explain why you felt the need for a photo of the fanjo boil when the doctors appointment was that very day-did you expect it to vanish...? Hmm

mummyinbonniescotland · 12/03/2014 22:07

The body - honest when I say my (female) doctor suggested it as this boil kept coming and going by the time I got to the appointment (often several days after I requested one).

OP posts:
mummyinbonniescotland · 12/03/2014 22:08

bolshier, I was just doing what the doctor suggested!

OP posts:
Lazyjaney · 12/03/2014 22:10

"Quote OP 'He doesn't feel he gets enough sex or BJs. So I think he is resorting to this."

Now why am I not surprised to read this?

I'd bet its Photoshopped, may not even be all the OPs bits. Sounds to me like a bit of sex fantasy from a guy who is not getting very much of the real thing tbh.

BolshierAyraStark · 12/03/2014 22:10

But the appointment was that day & the boil was there so no photo needed surely?

HopefulHamster · 12/03/2014 22:11

Don't know why people have focused on the doctor thing. I have had to take pics of eczema on my breast before. It flares up and then is nearly always much better at appointment time. So much so whenever I have been referred to a dermatologist I've had the same one who always takes one look and then tells me to use vaseline, like I've never thought of that before...

I'd be furious OP. He's minimising. If it wasn't him he should be deeply concerned and trying to find out where the pic came from.

He's hoping if he denies for long enough it will all go away, especially as he will have deleted (or moved) the evidence.

AgentZigzag · 12/03/2014 22:12

I think you need to back off a bit if you're hitting and throwing things at him.

I know you're very upset but that doesn't excuse you doing anything you like to him.

AgentZigzag · 12/03/2014 22:15

Does he believe you when you say you saw the photographs OP?

If he does, how does he think they got there?

Wouldn't that mean there was someone else involved if it wasn't you and it wasn't him?

ViviPru · 12/03/2014 22:18

This is baffling, please can you clarify OP.

My understanding is you saw ONE photo of yourself naked with your bits on display, and you can't remember when/where it was taken? Do I have that correct?

So one possible explanation is he has superimposed your face over a porn image? Did you not recognise the setting, your legs? And the vag snaps, surely you'd recognise your own, even with a fleeting glance at a small thumbnail preview?

Lazyjaney · 12/03/2014 22:19

"he's home. I screamed. I cried. I hit him. I threw things"

I'm beginning to form another picture here....

AgentZigzag · 12/03/2014 22:23

That's a thread in itself Vivi, 'would you recognise your own vag snap if it was sprung on you out of context?'

I don't know whether I should be worried that I'm not 100% sure I could Grin

Quinteszilla · 12/03/2014 22:30

Personally I would not recognize something I have never seen.

ViviPru · 12/03/2014 22:33

Omg AgentZZ, imagine... I spy an image uploader down there... We could all do a swap n share. Justine could shuffle 'em up like a pack of cards and pull them out at random. I reckon I could identify the PruFanj at 20 paces...

UncleT · 12/03/2014 22:34

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Quinteszilla · 12/03/2014 22:37

Op, sure it is not another woman wearing your clothes, in your house, with just your face photo shopped on, rather than the rest?

FunkyBoldRibena · 12/03/2014 22:40

If he denies all knowledge then he will support you calling the police won't he?

Wantsunshine · 12/03/2014 22:44

Just want to add I know lots of people who take photos for their doctors. If things are intermittent then it's a good idea.

lookingfoxy · 12/03/2014 22:45

Just restore the computer to an earlier date then search for the folder again.

ViviPru · 12/03/2014 22:45

I've just re-read the OP. So the OP recognises her own clothes in the the legs akimbo pic. (And presumably her face and the setting) so where Photoshop comes into this I have no clue. Are we seriously suggesting he's superimposed spread eagle naked legs on a photo of the OP? This is utterly ridiculous.

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