AIBUs from/about fictional characters

[ProudAS]

I'll start

AIBU to report neighbours to social services

Their 11YO DS appears to be morbidly obese and IMO is getting to look more and more like a pig. I think I saw a curly tail poking out of his trousers.

Their DNephew on the other hand appears malnourished. He's also 11 and has lived with them since he was a baby and his DPs died. I've heard rumours that they lock him in the cupboard under the stairs and make him sleep in there. FFS the house has 4 bedrooms and they only have 1 DC.

It's now getting more suspicious. DNephew hasn't been around for a while and apparently he's away at a school for incurably criminal boys. He's always seemed well behaved to me and I was unaware that such schools existed.

I don't want to poke my nose in but WWYD?

[Ohwhatfuckeryisthis]

Aibu, I have a long career in law enforcement, but no one takes me seriously. My boss is ok, hard but fair you know. Used to drink, but got married and gave it up. My problem is I never get considered for promotion, lots of new "people" have joined the force and everyone gets promoted over me. Ok, I can be a bit lazy, and have been known to "borrow" things, but there is no need to turn me upside down to empty my pockets, it's demeaning. I'm not classically handsome, but there are bigger freaks than me on the force(although my boss does make me carry a certificate to prove I'm human) but I'd like to be taken seriously.

[SelectAUserName]

AIBU to insist my DH looks for another job? His boss completely takes the piss, getting him to work ridiculously long hours in a freezing cold office for less than NMW. I am a SAHM, we have 6 DCs and the youngest has a disability. DH keeps sticking up for his boss when I raise the issue but we can barely make ends meet. I know it's only March but I'm dreading Christmas already because there's no way we'll be able to afford a turkey, never mind presents.

(Incidentally I'm sure DH's boss is an alcoholic. He's always muttering about spirits, at any rate.)

[sassytheFIRST]

Ohwhatfuckery....not a clue. Rankin?

Selectausername...watch that littlest lad of yours. He's rather frail. What he needs is some rich chap to take an interest and then he might survive into adulthood after all

[KoalaFace]

ohwhatfuckery your last one is driving me mad!

[YoureAllABunchOfBastards]

What fuckery - Nobby Nobbs?

[Ohwhatfuckeryisthis]

Got it bastard. (Was waiting for mrsterrypratchett)

[Samhainslass]

AIBU to think that really, my employer had no right to sanction the use of questionable medical procedures on me whilst I was in a coma? I'm feeling very conflicted: he did promote me to the head of my own department as a reward, but he also insisted that I go NC with many of my former friends and colleagues.

I have been having bizarre nightmares too - I think it must be stress related anxiety. My new team are nice enough but rather high maintenance tbh. Two of them have anger issues, two more are too emotionally close to be healthy, and the fifth has turned out to have some very worrying attitudes towards authority - she keeps hacking into the work computers for personal reasons!

Also my employer damaged some vintage collectable cards that I had purchased and has not replaced them yet...

[katese11]

AIBU to feeling like screaming sometimes?

I have 4yo DTs who are driving me mad! They have no discernable personalities of their own, and they talk in overly pedantic sentences, often saying the same thing in three different ways. I'd think they were strange, but all their friends talk in the same way. I sometimes think the whole lot of them are too old to be in nursery!

I feel under so much pressure to be the perfect Mummy, like every day is a how-to guide on life with preschoolers. Failure is not an option...If they don't acquire skills quickly we're screwed. They were only allowed one swimming lesson before having to enter a gala....AIBU to think that other families don't have this kind of pressure?

[GarthsUncle]

Fab!

[lessonsintightropes]

Ohwhatfuckery are you Corporal Nobby Nobs?

[lessonsintightropes]

Argh too late!

[lessonsintightropes]

And Samhainlass you are Agent Phil Coulson

[Samhainslass]

Welcome to Level 7

[lessonsintightropes]

beautiful place, Tahiti.

[pointythings]

AIBU to think that class issues are coming between me and my DH? I come from a wealthy background whereas he was born in the 'rough' part of town, and though we love each other dearly, he just can't seem to adapt to living in my house. He's always polite to my friends, but he also stays out all hours working (he's in the police so I know it comes with the territory) and doesn't look after himself - healthy eating is a mystery to him. A BLT to his mind is a pound of bacon, a tiny slice of tomato and a molecular layer of lettuce...

The stress is beginning to show, the other night he caused gridlock getting across town to be home in time to read to our little boy, and he refuses to use the fabulous Gooseberry phone I got him to help him manage his time better.

[Ohwhatfuckeryisthis]

I know, I know! Vimes. V good.

[pointythings]

Thank you! I love these threads.

OK then...

AIBU to be worried about my DF? He suffered a very serious head injury not long ago and his marriage to my DM broke up shortly afterwards. Now he's gone to live in a ramshackle beach house somewhere in Florida and he's taken up painting, is making a success of it by all accounts but he also sounds as if he might still be suffering from the consequences of his injury - seeing things that aren't there and so on.

I'm going to see him for his first exhibition, WIBU to suggest that this place might not be the best for him?

[pointythings]

And this one is a film I've just finished watching, not a book.

AIBU to be worried about my DSD? Until recently she seemed to resent my presence and didn't want to be involved with my DS, but suddenly she has turned over a new leaf. However, I hear strange sounds coming from her bedroom regularly, as if she is having a loud party in there, and there's this spooky white barn owl that flutters around our house. It's all a bit odd.

[puntasticusername]

pointythings your last is Labyrinth and the previous...that Stephen King book from a few years back, was it Duma Key or something like that...?

[pointythings]

to you, puntastic, it is indeed Duma Key, which is my favourite Stephen King.

[puntasticusername]

\o/

Have you read Bag of Bones? I loved that one and to me, Duma Key felt a bit like just a reheat of it - but I only read it the once.

That's the one where someone gets stuck in a Portaloo, isn't it? That bit does stick in my mind

[mrspremise]

Thid stupid little git in the village is winding everyone he meets up into a frenzy about pending-apocalyptic-doom. WIBU for leading him into a cave, on the pretext of meeting someone who can' help' and gobbling him up?

[cashmiriana]

AIBU to ask my DP to kill his friend?

He's best mates with my cousin's fiance and at their wedding the groom went a bit ape and refused to marry her, calling her some really horrible names and saying she's been having an affair. My DP was lovely and said he wanted to help her, but when I told him to kill his mate, he refused and now we're not talking.

Am I coming on a bit strong? I don't want to drip feed, and there's a bit of history. We were together before, and it didn't work out, but for years we went NC and he's in the armed forces so we only saw each other at family events (and tbh I could be a real bitch to him.)

But recently I found out he still really likes me, and we've got back together. I don't know what to think. Now I can't stop crying about my cousin who's a really nice kid. . What should I do?

[GarthsUncle]

I am six. A naked man keeps appearing in my meadow and asking me to bring him clothes and food. I don't want to tell my mother as she gets very tired and emotional but AIBU to tell Daddy?