to want to stop breastfeeding at 6 months?

[youaremychocolatecake]

My baby is 17wo and EBF, I love breastfeeding, I am very pro breastfeeding, we have an easy feeding relationship, he is a quick efficient feeder, good sleeper, no issues at all.

But I want to stop when he is 6 months. Don't judge me but I've never really fancied feeding an older baby for some reason and the thought of BF into toddlerhood just weirds me out. I don't have a problem with anyone else doing it but it's not for me.

However, as the 6 month mark rapidly approaches I'm feeling really guilty because he loves breastfeeding. My first baby was mix fed but he wasn't in love with the booby like this one is. It was a means to and end for him and he self weaned at around 6 months. This boob monster however loves laying with it in his mouth, stroking it, pinching it (ouch) it's his comfort so I feel really bad about taking it away. Also he really hates a bottle (of EBM) so I don't even know how to go about weaning him!

I'm a member of all these pro breastfeeding groups on Facebook and they're all there feeding babies until they self wean and I just feel really guilty wanting to stop? But after 40 weeks of pregnancy, 6 months BF feels enough for me. I want to wear a normal bra or be able to go out for an evening. Am I being really really mean?

Everyone draws the line somewhere when it comes to breastfeeding - some don't start, some don't stop, some feed for a day/week/month/year. Do whatever you feel comfortable with. Milk intake decreases slowly over time as food is introduced, and EBM might be easier to feed straight from a cup - I didn't have sippy cups or anything, just used a normal glass.

Yanbu if it's what you want to do. I stopped at 6 months, I also didn't fancy feeding any longer. We had about 3 days of it being a bit stressful until dd took to the bottle and formula. After 3 days she forgot about it and I felt 'free'. I stopped ds after 4 months due to mammoth thrush in my ducts and it just wouldn't go away.

I wanted to mix feed at 6 months old after EBF until then. Due to allergies DS couldn't have standard formula so I ended up bfing him until he was 2.

I was so upset that he couldn't have standard formula and wouldn't take the hypoallergenic formula as I was so exhausted by it, but actually once DS was weaned bfing was sooo much easier. I was able to wear a normal bra. I was glad I continued in the end.

I've never given my children a bottle but they have used a Doidy cup when I was out from a few months old. You can go out while breastfeeding. I've found my DC have taken milk from a cup far, far easier when I am not in the house, so they've been fine.

I think there is a lot of research that supports the theory that breastfeeding for the first 6 months is the most beneficial and it becomes less so after that

This really is not true but it is irrelevant to this thread but I hate to see myths being perpetuated. Just like anything that is healthy, think vegetables, it does not have a cut off.

However I think women have to make decisions for themselves about what is right for them. I am bf a 2 year old but am working towards convincing him to stop because I am ready and others would be happy to let him self wean.

BF is quite controversial no formula feeding is controversial or actually are they both just very ridiculous statements.

I BF DS1 until he was 21 months, when he self-weaned. I also pumped from week 2, so that I could have bouts of freedom.

DS2 is five weeks. Same thing: he took a bottle of pumped milk from week 2, and I generally give him one a day, so that I can get more sleep, focus on DS2 for a bit, go for a postnatal massage etc.

I know it's hard for some, but I'm surprised more women don't pump from an early stage in order to get their babies used to a bottle.

It's completely up to you what you do with your own baby. 6 months is a great start and if you want to stop at that point then of course that's fine.

You are also completely entitled to feel how you do about breastfeeding an older baby, but you should be aware that there's really nothing to be 'weirded out' by. Breastfeeding an older baby/toddler is just a natural continuation of the breastfeeding relationship and carries on alongside eating solid foods, drinking cows milk when over 1 etc. It's not the intense experience that feeding a young baby is, but it's still a very important part of life for a lot of children/mothers.

I don't have any experience of stopping at 6 months, but I believe perseverance is the key. If things don't work out with a bottle, I've known many babies to prefer a cup.

Good luck OP and remember, it's your baby, your body, your decision.

I breastfed until DS self weaned, he was 4 and he never once demanded it in the playground!

You should do whatever feels right for you. Don't feel guilty about it. IME you feel guilty whenever you stop, seems to be some kind of hormonal thing. I feel guilty because I worry I encouraged him to wean even though he was 4 years old and it was his very clear decision!

stopgap it doesn't make a difference. If you get a bottle refuser they will reject it whether they've had a regular bottle or never had one in their life.

stopgap DD was exclusively fed on bottled pumped milk till she was a couple of weeks old, then continued on one bottle a day. Her getting used to the bottle wasn't the problem. She just decided that, once she started solids at 6 months, she'd rather eat food and drink water if I wasn't there to feed her!

Breastfeeding is a relationship.
it sounds like you have a different feeding relationship with this baby compared to the older one.
So that's a big part of why you're conflicted.
Just because quitting at 6 months was perfect for the other one & what you always planned with this baby doesn't mean that it will be the best choice again.
I think you need to allow some space to go with what feels comfortable now (whatever that may be).

I had to battle to keep mine feeding after they started solids (for a few weeks, then they reverted to their first love after all). So nobody gets perfectly what they want, I guess.

you chose duration to bf?entirely up to you?no reason to discuss or justify with anyone

stopgap DS1 took a bottle with no trouble from the start. I've been pumping from about day five with DS2 and he just will not take a bottle. We've tried every kind of teat/cup/bottle we can find and he's just not having it. It doesn't always follow that if you start early baby will learn.

As I said above I'm totally fine with other people breastfeeding their toddlers, it's just not for me, it would weird ME out, Personal choice.

I think you are right lljk I am comparing him to no1 maybe when there totally different children. No2 is actually a way easier, happier and more settled baby

Possibly a good time to introduce a comfort object if youre happy to go down that route
(Buy three!)

I also cover in public because that makes me feel comfortable but I don't think other people should if they feel comfortable not doing so. Different strokes for different folks. I love breastfeeding my baby but I don't want to breastfeed an older child, for a start I will be returning to work when he is 1. I respect those who do though.

You sound about 15 op

Some of your language is so childish and offensive.

"wierd me out"

Give me strength!

Oh, and unless you are very new here, I think you might know that a thread like yours would be trouble!

Do what you want, you are obviously going to anyway!

It's your body and your choice.

What I would say is that feeding from about 7/8 months onwards is nothing like feeding a younger baby - as a pp has pointed out. They start solid foods for one thing and the feeds just become less frequent. I started being able to go out in the evening when DC was about 7 months old and believe me, there is not a child out there more obsessed with boob than mine. I also wear normal bras and lovely clothes. It's so, so easy being able to feed anywhere & distract if unwell etc.

Oh and DC is a total bottle refuser, he isn't 'always attached' to me and we go out anywhere and everywhere.
The 'if you breastfeed you'll be stuck inside forever' is something I think the formula companies have drummed into women with the advert where the lady is breastfeeding and it's all gloomy outside until she gives a bottle & the sun comes out.

People can fb and be at work, a one year old might be very happy to get a feed at bedtime for instance, and other milk the rest of the time.
The breast and bottle feeding topic is supportive and a wiser choice than AIBU if you don't want a bunfight.

Hi OP,

I just wanted to share my experience of weaning DS. He was breastfed on demand and at 18 months was still taking up to three feeds a day.

He was a huge boob monster and I was ready to give up but concerned that it would be hard on him.

He was fine! I just handed him over to DH at the times he was used to BFing to break the habit. He didn't seem to mind at all and, after a week we were back to the usual routine sans BF.

When I put him to bed, we now have a lovely cuddle at the point when he would previously have BF. I'm sure its just as nice for him and he seems completely contented.

Please don't worry about your little one. He will adapt quickly. You have done excellently to get him to 6 months.

Also- maybe give those Facebook pages a miss if you find them pressurising. Motherhood is a relationship not a project.

YANBU.

I have had a hell of a time breastfeeding DD, who will be five months soon. It has only just started to get easier. There is no way I would stop at six months, and I hope to feed her until she is at least 1. I have no intention of messing around with formula and sterilising bottes after having got through the hard bit of breastfeeding.

However, it is entirely your decision. To have breastfed for six months is a fantastic achievement. Plenty of people I know won't even consider breastfeeding, which I think is such a shame, especially when there are so many people it seems who want to breastffed, and aren't able to due to a variety of reasons.

If you want to stop, then stop.

I have up at 7 months with DS2 because I wanted to. I enjoy BFing, I think it is a heat thing to do but I was just ready to stop then. I was abit sad but that soon passed and I don't regret stopping them at all (he's almost 4 now). I stopped with my first a little earlier and sometimes feel I could have continued a bit longer.

Third time around DS3 was bfed for 13 months part of which was to do with his being a cows milk allergic bottle refuser! I had no choice. He is the one I have has the least regrets/ sadness about stopping over, probably because I was more than ready to stop by then.

I really admire those who go on until self weaning but I'm too selfish.

YANBU, do what you want to do. X

I hope I look 15 as well as sound 15 in my dreams... Sorry to have offended anyone, wasn't trying to be judgemental about what other people do, the choices we make as parents are individual and as I've previously said I respect others who do extended BF but I don't think it's for me. I just wanted to gather some opinions on if I was being unreasonable wanting to stop Thank you to everybody who has contributed. I feel much more informed going forward and think we will just see how it goes, play it by ear rather than set a stopping date. I've has no experience of BFing beyond 6 months and I'm the only BFer in my family so thought this would be a food place to ask advice.