AIBU to think what I've just video'd is a bit binkers

[mirtzapine]

DD1 8yo, keeps on refusing to sleep at a decent time, she fights and fights and its worn DW and myself out.

Today I video's her on my phone making a promise that she will go to sleep at 10 at the latest, otherwise I'll delete minecraft. I said that if she throws a tantrum tonight I'll play it back to her as a reminder.

(minecraft is only used in single player mode and she likes making pink wool houses)

She did follow on by asking if I could post it on youtube...

Writing it out loud like this makes me think I'm totally shite at parenting,

I have only just started reading How to talk to kids

Kids not sleeping can really really wear you down, and make you feel tired and cross - so you are not shite at parenting and neither is your wife.

Has she always had trouble sleeping?

A few suggestions off the top of my head (although its a good while since I had an 8 yr old!):
Ten o-clock seems a bit late to me - I would think she has gone past the best time for her to fall asleep by then and has started waking up again.

I think you have to really try to rethink the whole bedtime thing, I guess she has her tea and then does any homework she has to. After that I would have a limited time in which she can play, then its into bed time routine. I wouldn't let her play any fast stimulating screen games before she goes to bed - keep them for just afte school or daytime.

Then warn her half an hour before the time you actually want her in her bed. She then finishes up what she's doing, gets herself washed and in her night clothes and gets into bed. And she doesn't get out except for toilet. If she still likes a story read at bedtime - she can lie and relax while one of you read to her, or read for a short time herself if she prefers. No screens or TV's after she;s in bed though.

It is incredibly hard work - you have my sympathy, my DS was a poor sleeper, and we found the only thing that helped was having a very strict bedtime routine and totally sticking to it - you might have tantrums for a few days until her body gets into the new routine. Butsleep is a habit and if you get into a late habit, you have to break it somehow.

If its any comfort - My DD was a good sleeper - so I believe its nothing to do with parenting - some kids are just easier at bedtime than others.