AIBU to think that workmen should offer to take their shoes off in your house?

[Dollslikeyouandme]

I'm a shoes off in the house person, and always offer to take mine off when visiting. It's not because I'm a weird cream carpet visitor slippers freak. But I have carpet, a ds who likes to play on the floor. And a neighbourhood where the streets seem to be covered in dog shit.

I hate asking people to take off their shoes, so usually don't, and just hope they do anyway.

I've noticed workmen never take off their shoes, and lately I've had to have a few people in and around the house and gave been cringing at their boots standing on my bathmat mainly.

I just think shoes on carpets are gross.

I'd rather have mud then a strangers stinky boot-foot-sweat on my floors :/

Yes, because someone kept their muddy shoes on in my house

but who cares about mud? that's just earth and water. particles and bacteria is where it's at! particles of someone's phlegm from the pavement, or their regurgitated dinner. these are the things that are not welcome in my gaff.

well, DD crawled all over our not-especially-clean floors without appearing to come to any harm - no shoes off in our house, cats wandering about, DH's bike in and out of the house, and we never washed the floors that much either - never seemed much point - every time I wash the floors it rains without fail and the cats trail muddy footprints in, so I really can't be arsed.

Bikes - now, there's a point. DH is hardly going to remove the wheels of his bike every time he brings it in, and he has to bring it inside the house as we have no side return or outside access to the back. Would the shoes-off people not allow that, because goodness knows what his bike tyres have been through.

I'm sure no one comes to any harm but I just don't like the thought of those things floating about. ugh! a fragment of a stranger's dried bogey from the pavement gets stuck to your foot, which then gets transferred to your bed, or whatever.
Reckon cavemen had it properly easy when it came to question marks over the state of their flooring! a little mud and perhaps a question mark over animal droppings but that's about it!

Bikes- aaaaggggggghhh!

My floors are already clean enough kitchensinkmum.

A lot of people here seem to have stinky sweaty feet I don't know why unless you're wearing trainers with no socks or ballet pumps from Bacons.

A fragment of a bogey? Oh ffs do you handle coins and notes? Door handles? Now they do actually make me cringe sometimes.

OP was quite specific on the issue of removing shoes merely for the personal preference of the home-owner, which we have now established is both naff and unnecessary.

Is it not really rude to assume you can march in with shoes on as if it's your own home?

No, it's perfectly normal. It's what most people do.

How about lighting up a cigarette without asking?

Or taking out a bar of chocolate and eating it on someone's white couch?

Could you assume you might put your feet up on her coffee table?

a) I don't smoke.
b) I'd offer it around. That's a whole new thread "No chocolate near the white couch".
c) I don't put my feet up on my own coffee table so wouldn't do it elsewhere, either.

Hypothetically, if you smoked, would you light a cigarette without asking?

If the couch was any shade lighter than black, would you eat it there or offer it around in someone else's house? (Exact shade of couch not really important -- the point is chocolate is hard to get out of furniture and tucking into it on someone else's furniture without asking if they minded would be rude imo, and would risk messing up their couch)

If you felt like putting your feet up on someone's coffee table, would you?

Would you flush a tampon down her loo? (Some plumbing gets bunged up if tampons are flushed).

Would you deposit a poo filled nappy in someone's kitchen bin?

The principle I am driving at here is why is it ok to behave exactly as you please in someone else's home?

How you behave may be because you are used to doing things that way at home, or simply because the fancy strikes you. But the basic issue is why do you think it's ok to behave as you please without asking the hostess her preference in her house?

You don't do any of those things because it is not normal behaviour - keeping your clean shoes on is normal behaviour.
Anyone at all would take walking boots off if they had just been through the woods on muddy tracks, they wouldn't take off polished leather shoes if they had just arrived by car.

All of those things might be normal behaviour in someone's house, which is the basis of the argument in favour of not only keeping your shoes on but also not bothering to ask your hostess if you should take them off.

People smoke, eat bars of choc sitting on their couches, put their feet up on their coffee tables, flush tampons, and put poo-filled nappies into their kitchen bins at home. So why not do them in someone else's house?

If you are so sure your shoes are clean after walking outside, would you let your baby lick the soles? Would you lick them yourself?

TamerB is right. There is normal social behaviour and not normal.

But in more detail-

If I smoked I would only smoke without asking if there were ashtrays lying around.

I don't normally take chocolate to someone's house to eat but (as it happens) I don't know anyone daft enough to own a white couch anyway.

I have never felt the urge to put my feet on any coffee table.

I have flushed tampons down loos but not in houses where they have a little notice asking you not to because of iffy plumbing.

I used cloth nappies so would flush the contents down the loo and bag the nappy.

And I would not expect to be asked to remove my shoes when calling on friends. It's never happened, though.

Why in earth would I stand by and let a baby lick my shoes?
You don't behave like you would at home in someone else's house.
You take your shoes off if someone asks, you can refuse to wear their 'house slippers' . I tried asking people if I should remove my shoes after reading MN- they all looked a bit taken aback and all said ' no, no, keep them on'. I have gone back to just wearing them, if dirty.
I certainly don't want people wandering around my house in bare feet or socks.

Sorry- I automatically take them off if dirty!

I find a huge gap between RL and MN and do hope that all these people who take their shoes off will keep them on in my house if I ask them to!

I know only one person who asks me to take my shoes off- and then I freeze as you take them off at the door and walk over a stone floor!

I see lots of spits (sorry) and dog poo on roads and if you are not careful enough you can step on any of them.
so, I don't agree wearing shoes at home.

I have this lovely picture of an evening party, everyone dressed in their best but in socks or blue plastic overshoes!

Obviously if I stepped in dog poo I would take them off at the door. I have never, ever had anyone walk dog poo into my house

If you are a shoes-off household, what happens when you have a party? Do you have 40, say, pairs of shoes piling up in the hall. Or are shoes-off types so protective of their carpets that parties never happen?

Dressed for a party I need my shoes or my trousers are too long- I would be tripping over them!