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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to worry?

12 replies

divisionbyzero · 18/02/2014 00:04

I borrow my DPs phone to check my mail as I'd ordered something I was excited about, and DP hands over phone without even asking what I want to borrow it for, which is pretty normal for us.

I open the browser app and see what appears to be a facebook account. I am struck by a peculiarity of the visible friends list, and realise it's a different fb account in DPs name... mostly I just feel guilty for being there and prying, so I close the page and get on with what i was doing.

Trouble is I've now opened the box, so to speak. Why does DP have a separate account that appears to be secret, while maintaining another I know about? Why does it have not work contacts or anything, but people of the opposite sex we have never had more than a passing acquaintance with as friends? Do I ask, or do I shut up and trust and take this concern as the rightful price I pay for (albeit inadvertently) prying?

I don't think impropriety is generally very likely from DP, so I don't know.

OP posts:
ChaosTrulyReigns · 18/02/2014 00:05

The Facebook app has just changed a few days ago, it looks quite different, could that be it?

WorraLiberty · 18/02/2014 00:06

Of course you should ask.

Bit weird how he hasn't changed his name though?

Do you think it might be a gaming account? Is he into Mafia Wars etc?

Famzilla · 18/02/2014 00:08

Very strange.

If it's in the same name can you see it from your account? If I were in your position I would have just asked him there & then. You weren't really prying, you stumbled across it whilst trying to do something else.

Anonymai · 18/02/2014 00:11

I would do a bit of digging before asking. The relationships board has taught me even the man you think would never do anything can do something. The moment you ask is the moment the paper trail (internet trail?) is wiped by him.

lottieandmia · 18/02/2014 00:13

If I found that my DP had a secret facebook account I would have done as much prying as I could! Why should you feel guilty when he is the one being secretive in that respect?

I would have looked at the account and particularly messages and whether his relationship status is the same as on the other account.

lottieandmia · 18/02/2014 00:14

It is possible that he uses it just for gaming and only has friends who can help him play. That way you don't annoy your usual facebook friends.

But then, why did you recognise the people on the new list?

Original poster
divisionbyzero · 18/02/2014 00:14

Yes, I think I'll just ask. I'm certain DP wouldn't do anything untoward - if anything i feel embarrassed about even worrying about it, it's just bizarre and bears inquiry. Thank you for your replies.

OP posts:
Goofymum · 18/02/2014 00:16

I would just ask, especially as your first paragraph implies you have an open and honest relationship (the fact he handed the phone over, no issue, and you said that's normal). Is probably harmless.

RunRabbit · 18/02/2014 00:18

Is this deja vu? Confused

I wonder if the page will miraculously disappear when you ask him about it.

AwfulMaureen · 18/02/2014 00:19

how odd...this thread is almost identical to another....

Original poster
divisionbyzero · 18/02/2014 00:45

Another thread the same? As in I hit submit twice, or by another user?

OP posts:
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