To want some ownership of this property?

[Normalisavariantofcrazy]

MIL has 'kindly' allowed us to live in her house, which is unmortgaged, rent free.

I say 'kindly' as it's a shell of a house that had needed completely gutting and renovating to make it habitable including expensive jobs such as replacing the bathroom, floors throughout, installing central heating and replacing the whole fence for the large back garden with no financial help from MIL.

I've broached the subject with DH that as we've spent a not insignificant amount of money on the house that we approach his mum with the view to buying it off her. He's not adverse to the idea but feels his mum will be very against it.

I'm petrified that now the house is in a very good condition she's quids in and could well sell it from under us.

We have no tenancy agreement in place either.

What would, in your mind, be a good solution here?

To want some ownership of this property?

OP, I think it is this line that convinced us all that security is not your main concern, but a share of the property.

If you formalised a tenancy how would you afford the going rate for rent if you couldn't save whilst paying very little for 3 years?

You have no rights to your Mil's house and I find it odd you think you should. Offer to buy by all means but tbh you've had a very good deal for 3 years. You are no more insecure than most tenants. You seem to want the best of both worlds here.

You sound very grabby. This could be your downfall. If you had to rent privately then when all the usual costs of living come up as you have said they have you will be in debt. You have had the benefit of having the house as you want in which you can't do in a private rent. Now you've had the work down you continue to get free accommodation. If you bring up tenancy agreements etc. then you may also get charged rent.

Another thing to consider is that should your mil need to live at a care home it is possible that your house may need to be sold to pay the fees. Also if you buy the house at a discounted price this could considered deprivation of assets.

You really to look into the implications for your family and your mil whether you buy the house or continue as you are.

I know it's cheap, I'm not being 'grabby' at all, I'm concerned about the long term future because at the moment we have no security

Quite right too, your position is vulnerable. Should she pass away tomorrow and you find out the house has gone to the cats home...what then .

I wouldn't trust anyone, I don't think everyone is out to fleece you but at the end of the day people change, your MIL for instance may have geniunly done this out the goodness of her heart. but once seeing the house look nice...a friend could whisper in her ear...any ideas...and prospects with the money from the sale...in her vulnerable old age...and she could sell it.

well within her rights, its her house and she has to look after herself...but then what do you do? back to square one.

when dealing with the actual roof over ones head. tie it down as far as possible so both parties expectations are met.

BTW you dont sound grabby at all! You sound sensible. there are enough homeless people struggling, dont add to their number!

You do appear to think that you have done your MIL a favour by renovating the house while in fact it is the other way around. She has been more than kind letting you live there for free

They have both been doing each other a huge favour non?.

You may have a point but I'd let your partner deal with his mother.

I appreciate English residential tenancy law is not exactly the same as Scots law but if you were in Scotland the comments about "you have no rights""it's her house" "you don't have a lease" etc, etc are simply wrong.

You have paid rent. It doesn't need to be in cash and it doesn't need to be the full market going rate to create a secure tenancy.

Lizzie I think most posters have said that she has no rights when it comes to ownership. She is clearly a tenant, just not an owner (or part owner as it might be). Nobody is suggesting that she doesn't have any rights because she doesn't have a lease. People are simply answering her question of whether she is unreasonable to want ownership in the house.

That said, OP does need to tread carefully. Perhaps a good solution would be to agree to buy at some point, and to use the money and time currently freed up by not doing imrpovements to save for a deposit.

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This

I can see what you are saying OP (although I disagree with you), but have you actually thought about this from your MIL's point of view?

That is her house. Her home that she has no doubt spent many years paying for. She has let you all live there for 3 years, in return for you & your DH paying for the needed work. That does not make it your house & does not give you any entitlement to have "security" there.

However, you say that MIL is a lovely person. I doubt very much whether she would throw you out (unless you demand rights over her home possibly), which is more security than most private tenants. Also, your DH is an only child. Whilst nothing should be expected or presumed, I would think it likely he will own the house ultimately anyway?

You don't seem to have taken your MIL's need for security into the equation at all. What if she did sell the house to you? Why should she then have the same worries about what would happen to her if you decided she should move out or hit financial difficulties & needed to sell up?

She has spent a not inconsiderable amount of years working towards owning this house (probably). It is her security that is paramount.

This is how my mum felt about her large house, which needed work, anyway. She could have benefitted hugely by downsizing in her lifetime but would not - as she felt the house was the only thing that was totally hers & her and my dad had spent many years working on it & paying for it themselves.

You sound grabby and if you approached me with your attitude, i'd likely to decide to sell the house or find somebody that appreciated it.

You may have spent £10k on it but compared to three years rent free its a bargain even factoring in labour. You should have set aside the market rent in savings if you wanted security and bought your own place. Your day to day costs would still be the same whether you rent or buy and are just normal adult expenses.

I think you should bring it up with your MIL then start a new thread in AIBU asking is MIL out of order to throw us out for being ungrateful. You clearly don't know when you are on to a good thing.

Your first post did sound a bit bashy.

It was kind of her to let you live there. Maybe her standards are not the same as yours, perhaps she thought it perfectly fine to live in?

Just get your DH to ask would be my advice.

I don't understand the problem here at all.

Your MIL is clearly a lovely woman who has let you live rent free for years in her house.

Yes you have invested money in the property by making some improvements but it is unlikely that you have increased the house price by more than what you should have paid in rent over the 3 years (30k ish)

You claim to be worried about what would happen if your MIL suddenly decided she didn't want to rent to you or if she got in to financial difficulty and had to sell, you want some security.

Welcome to the rental world! You are no different to anyone else who rents... apart from oh yes you haven't been paying any rent.

Also if MIL needed to sell surely she would sell to her son if that is what he suggested...Why would she then sell to someone else? She has let you live rent free, why are you concerned that she is suddenly going to chuck you out on the street?

If you don't like it, bloody well save up and buy your own house. You sound incredibly grabby and entitled.

I don't think I'd rock the boat at this stage tbh. You should have got a legal agreement before giving up a secure council tenancy - personally I think you were crazy to do that!

Over the next 3 years you'll be able to save £10K if you managed to spend it on renovations in 3 years. In many parts of the country £10K is a decent deposit for your own home on the open market. Take advantage of the fact that you are now at the point where you CAN save up a deposit as you currently have no rent/mortgage to pay.