Aibu to buy valentines cards for my children

[Ghanagirl]

Bought them on impulse whilst doing shopping, DH thinks it's a bit strangeð???

I didn't want to ban Xmas, I wanted to ponder on whether it was a good idea to lie to our children about Santa. No probs with Xmas actual, I love Xmas.

So ner

My mum and auntie used to send cards between me and my cousin, from when we were about 4 until we were 9. They were always just cute little messages, more for their benefit than ours

That's so cute

Ghanagirl - its lovely you got your DCs V/Cards. I bought one for my DSS (and I have done for years), nice happy memories for the future! This year's was awesome, it was a glow- in-the- dark one plus chocolates. All a bit of fun and meant in a light-hearted way. When he has a girlfriend in future it will be "over to her" - I'm not taking any of it too seriously, neither is he.

He went off to school today to do Valentines Day Karaoki with the teachers and classmates.

It isn't "weird" or "creepy" - as long as you and your family are happy, that's what counts

Seems a bit odd to me, but each to their own.

I was always led to believe that Valentine's cards were a secret kind of thing to send to someone you fancied, so I don't really understand why people in a relationship give them either.

I didn't get our kids cards, but I got them each a small box of chocolates, and a little toy. My parents always got us something for Valentine's day.

I got a Valentine's card from a co-worker on Wednesday when I saw her. We're American, though, and apparently weird. ;)

Do your kids not have Valentine's parties at school, then, with the boxed cards and little paper mailboxes?

My ds is 4-no way could I give my dh a card and chocs and leave him out. He understands that valentines day is about telling the one you love how much you mean to them-he doesn't understand the difference between love for a partner and love for a child so he got a card and some stickers off me, nothing weird about that-I find it weird that people think it's weird!

YABU

It is important for children to distinguish between romantic love, friendship love and family love.

This is weird and confusing.

It's fine to think it's not weird. It's also fine to think it's weird. People can think what they like, it's not an attack. Sometimes it's uncomfortable to have people say that something you find eminently normal is not at all normal for them but you just have to accept it as you do the other way around.

I think it's weird. The history of Valentine is nothing to do with children, nor the love one feels for other family members, it's romantic love. Whether you want to take that and re-jig it a bit to include your whole family then that's up to you.

As for not being able to give a partner/husband something without giving to the children, that's ridiculous. Do you have to do something so obviously in front of them always? If you can't be discreet then you'll have to just say 'not for you', it's not a bad lesson. Children get very much attention and 'things' so once in a while you can feel justified in saying 'no'. Of course if you don't want to and you need to involve them in everything, just be honest about it, that's what you want to do, no need for excuses.

My grandmother used to send roses for my sister and I to our school.

She meant well, but it was just really, really embarrassing. Especially when you're a chubby nerd-girl who can't actually talk to boys.

I WOULD have thought it was a bit weird but last night DS made and gave me a Valentine and it was very sweet. Then this morning he wished his dad a Happy Valentines Day so I very rapidly made him a home made card while he was still upstairs getting dressed and presented it when he came down. He was delighted. Valentines all round next year for definite!

I have made cards for my children and written worth little rhymes inside about how much I love them (with a bit about poo for the 4 year old and Harry Potter for the 7 year old).

As for not being able to give a partner/husband something without giving to the children, that's ridiculous.'

Exactly.

It is really, really creepy.

But I have just done the very thing. I didn't think anything of it until I saw DS's crestfallen little mush at school this morning when girls were seeking out the boys to give cards to. THEY ARE SIX, FGS. I didn't think I'd have to worry about this yet! :(

Its creepy if you give your kids lover cards obvs a la Norman bates, but in just thinking choccy stuff etc or anon cards to make them feel spesh

Creepy is an attack Lying what is that insinuating exactly? The card I gave was designed for kids saying 'to my lovebugs' and it wasnt anonymous pretending to be from a secret admirer!

My inlaws dropped my DD's at school this am and the four year old got a valentine! The mother of her 'admirer' does love to say things like 'they are boyfriend and girlfriend' [Hmm]

my dh always sends our 2 girls cards. It's sweet.

No it isn't, 2tired. Nobody's calling another poster 'creepy'. They're saying that the practice is creepy - and they're entitled to do that. Just as the child-valentiners defend their position (although they don't need to) by saying that the creepy-callers are creepy.

I don't care what you do with your children but be prepared for others not to agree with what you do when you post it. You're sensitive because you perceive non-agreement as a veto on what you're doing. It isn't, has anybody suggested that you mustn't or that you should stop?

After years at school feeling sad about not getting valentines cards and presuming that i was lovable I try to emphasise the fact that it's okay not to receive cards. I prefer not to make to big a deal of it all.

And i showed my kids how much i loved them yesterday. And the day before. And the day before...

But each to their own

I'm not sensitive nor would I stop because of a adverse opinion just dont see how it can just be the practice that's creepy and not the practioner, it is sad to hear of fellow parents thinking showing love to your kids in this way is 'creepy' but it just the way this country can be sometimes, so buttoned up

You see it as 'buttoned up', I see it as 'appropriate'. I don't think it's appropriate to send valentine cards to children and I don't do it.

The reason for calling the practice creepy and not the practitioner is down to MN guidelines if I were being cynical but also, not being cynical, I don't think a person is wholly defined by their behaviour and just because they might do something creepy I don't agree with doesn't make them 'creepy'.