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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think being bullied doesn't justify stabbing someone in the face?

328 replies

Topaz25 · 13/02/2014 11:34

So this article popped up in my newsfeed today. Teenager stabs girl in the face and beats another black and blue because they called him HARRY POTTER
www.facebook.com/dailymirror/posts/552566581523132

I was shocked at the amount of comments defending him! I was bullied as a child so I do understand it is devastating but that doesn't justify stabbing someone in the face! He didn't just lash out in the moment, he went home to get a knife to cause maximum damage, he lead the girls to the park, he thought this through. He is a danger to the public. I am also surprised at the sentence, I think stabbing someone in the face while shouting "die, die!" indicates intent to kill and should have been charged accordingly. I do wonder if his supporters would want to live next to him when he gets out or have him round to dinner since he is so misunderstood? I don't agree with bullying but when he attacked two younger girls I feel he effectively became the bully, it was a massive overreaction to the situation and he had other options. AIBU?

OP posts:
Supercosy · 15/02/2014 15:35

That was to neverthebride
. It does remind me a bit of burglars who get beaten by a householder. It's not right but you are clearly partially to blame as the burglar on that situation.

wonderingsoul · 15/02/2014 15:37

bullying.. is not so black and white for me..
an adult or older child/teen.. i would veiw alot harder then a young child under.. 12. who may not be mature enough to really grasp what they are doing.

iv forgtiven my bully's, esp thouse who once have grown up (im still only 28 so was not really that long ago) have actually came and appogised to me for their actions, the knife handling boy did as well!

i dont think i could forgive any one who stabed me or some one i loved!

Farrowandbawl · 15/02/2014 15:38

I don't see how they (or a burgular in the last example) can be partially to blame.

If they didn't bully him or torment him so much (or that the burgular wasn't in the house) no one would have been hurt.

wonderingsoul · 15/02/2014 15:40

supercosy.. see i veiw that differently.. they where adults breaking the law intent to take stuff whislt doing so threating the guys life (who didnt know why they where there..they could have been on intent of killing him)

they where also adults who should know right from wrong. im glad he didnt get done for it.

BoneyBackJefferson · 15/02/2014 15:44

wonderingsoul
"they where also adults who should know right from wrong. im glad he didnt get done for it."

The girls that bullied this boy may not have been adults but they knew full well what they where doing. To say anything else excuses their behaviour.

Supercosy · 15/02/2014 15:52

Wondering you sound brilliant, good for you. I do understand that these were young people that is true but I work with young people and think that there are very few that wouldn't understand that that level of bullying was wrong. This does NOT mean they deserved to be stabbed, of course it doesn't but neither does it make them.innocent victims of violence.

wonderingsoul · 15/02/2014 16:01

im not at all excusing their behaviour ATALL. iv all ready said that bully is horendouse, but did they deserve to be stabbed in the face? no they didnt.
and im not saying they are completely inoccent in it, but it was right that they guy got done for it! i see that attack as an attack to kill.. becasue there was a high risk that it would have killed them in such a brutely way aswell.

the above comments where to another op.. who asked if i felt bullying is unforgivable.

WeekendsAreHappyDays · 15/02/2014 16:47

Whilst I hope the person who did extreme harm to our family, burns to a crisp in a nasty accident, and I am sure I could probably achieve some harm if I really wanted to - I would never set out to lower myself to that level.

But I hope and pray he never ever crosses my path, because god help me, I don't know if I could be responsible for my actions.

TheVictorian · 15/02/2014 22:25

although you could argue that the response was over the top, if the girls were not bullying him then they would not have been harmed.

deakymom · 15/02/2014 22:51

sooo he was called harry potter a seriously intelligent wizard who was popular as hell saved the world and got the girl? yes thats real bullying isn't it? honestly the guy is a psycho a nut and a wack job

i was bullied i was spat on called a lesbian had a knife held to my friends throat because we were virgins (age 13) and apparently we were sleeping together (we were not) i would have rulers smacked across my fingers comments thrown at me in class (smart bitch lick the teacher out did you?) this went on for years i've never stabbed anyone someone approached me after i had my daughter and asked me if i kept the turkey baster just in case i wanted another one i didn't stab her either people say nothing to me know perhaps its because im married with three kids perhaps its because my husband is ex forces and could take there head off either way its quieter now and ive still not stabbed anyone (BTW i was bullied at home too my life has been dramatic a lot of the time and ive still never stabbed anyone)

VampyreofTimeandMemory · 15/02/2014 22:53

spectacularly missed the point - do you really think it was just about harry potter?

AmIthatWintry · 16/02/2014 05:36

No, of course it wasn't about just Harry Potter.

He had a very extreme reaction to years of bullying. He shouldn't have done what he did, but he is being punished for it.

However, hopefully those wee goady bitches will now think twice about harassing and bullying someone who is just that little bit different. God only knows what shit he had to suffer from these little sods. The newspaper reports only touches on it.

And to the poster who thinks they were just trying to socialise - FFS, how is life in the 1950s?

squoosh · 16/02/2014 06:30

He is no better than a violent bully himself.

BoneyBackJefferson · 16/02/2014 11:25

deakymom

Did you miss the bit where he was followed around, spat upon and had been bullied for years?

Electryone · 16/02/2014 12:03

Topaz your constant disregard for the psychological effects of relentless bullying are breathtaking, as you your attempts to portray these girls as poor wee victims, which they are not. They are nasty bullies. And some people just don't take emotional and psychological bullying as seriously as they should, which is why they get away with it, time after time. No-one has to be battered black and blue for it to be serious, a mind scars just as much, if not more than a physical body. So "bullies should just be dealt with" - how exactly? Children who bully grow up into adults who bully. And people like you excuse them. You actually disgust me and its clear you do have an agenda, because its now coming across you have a bee in your bonnet about male violence against women, as if women can do no wrong. Some of your posts, for example going on about him "luring" them - implying he was in the wrong, rather than him knowing they would follow him - as they obviously had been doing, time after time, clearly show this.

Original poster
Topaz25 · 17/02/2014 00:36

Electryone I'm confused because you're talking to me but quoted something I didn't say: "bullies should just be dealt with".

I also never said women in general or these girls in particular can do no wrong. I do think it was wrong the way they treated him but some people act as if that excuses him attacking them and I don't think it does.

I think it is possible that you misunderstood me. I didn't say I have no sympathy for victims of bullying. I was simply shocked at the level of violence in this attack and I don't think being bullied excuses that as some people seem to be saying.

For someone who doesn't agree with bullying, it was very hurtful of you to say that I disgust you. Did you think about how that would make me feel? I understand this is an emotive issue but it is possible to disagree with someone without insulting them.

OP posts:
Original poster
Topaz25 · 17/02/2014 00:38

I can see I shouldn't have posted this in AIBU because it is an emotive issue and I didn't intend to upset anyone who has been bullied or knows people who have. I don't agree with bullying but I don't agree with violence either.

OP posts:
Destinysdaughter · 17/02/2014 00:40

When I was at school a teenage boy with mild learning disabilities stabbed another boy to death. He had been bullied for a long time and something just snapped. You just never know what's going to push someone over the edge...

BoneyBackJefferson · 17/02/2014 07:13

topaz

"Live with a man 40 years, share his house, his meals, speak on every subject. Then tie him up and hold him over the volcano's edge, and on that day, you will finally meet the man."

its from a tv show, but I think that it holds true in that you can only push people so far and you will only see what they are truly capable of when they snap.
When some people snap they take there own lives, when others snap they fold up inwardly and are never the same, when others snap it is with an explosive outward force.

I'm not going to say exactly what I did to the gang that bullied me, but if I hadn't exploded at them (and subsequently the shit of a father) I would have suffered all my life (physically and mentally at school then mentally on leaving school) from their actions with them having no consequences.

Electryone · 17/02/2014 08:20

Did you think about how that would make me feel? I understand this is an emotive issue but it is possible to disagree with someone without insulting them

I don't think saying your views disgust me - because they do - is insulting you at all, I havent called you names for example. Simply that you are not seeing the bigger picture.

Electryone · 17/02/2014 08:25

And I dont people here arent advocating violence just its very easy to understand how this happened. But people who think he "lured" those girls will never understand.

Nataleejah · 17/02/2014 09:29

Yes, so he "lured" his bullies, just as a rape victim who was wearing too short of a skirt.

Electryone · 17/02/2014 09:35

Aren't should be are!

UrethraFranklin · 17/02/2014 11:21

I can't believe some people have sympathy for those horrible girls. I doubt this was a one off - they will have been bullying for years with absolutely no consequences.

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