To think being bullied doesn't justify stabbing someone in the face?

[Topaz25]

So this article popped up in my newsfeed today. Teenager stabs girl in the face and beats another black and blue because they called him HARRY POTTER
www.facebook.com/dailymirror/posts/552566581523132

I was shocked at the amount of comments defending him! I was bullied as a child so I do understand it is devastating but that doesn't justify stabbing someone in the face! He didn't just lash out in the moment, he went home to get a knife to cause maximum damage, he lead the girls to the park, he thought this through. He is a danger to the public. I am also surprised at the sentence, I think stabbing someone in the face while shouting "die, die!" indicates intent to kill and should have been charged accordingly. I do wonder if his supporters would want to live next to him when he gets out or have him round to dinner since he is so misunderstood? I don't agree with bullying but when he attacked two younger girls I feel he effectively became the bully, it was a massive overreaction to the situation and he had other options. AIBU?

I just really don't buy all these people saying they would be lecturing their daughters who have just been brutally attacked. I don't. I think you would feel differently if your child nearly died. I think your primary concern would not be their attackers feelings.

Thanks for pointing that out, I had missed it. ASD is not an excuse though.

"Rather than developing emotionally from this experience aren't they more likely to be terrified and defensive"

Bullshit.

They'll be playing the victim card and lapping the sympathy up for as long as they can as all bullies who finally get what's coming to them do.

I read about this in the Daily Mail and to be honest I think they got their just desserts. I have known horrible jealous catty little people like them before and yes, if it had been them I would have been glad (sorry). I'm always saying on here how I believe in karma well here is proof!. The lad was the type people would pick on and it's NOT right or acceptable. You don't go round calling people names like that, he had just been out shopping for his Mum. Leave him to his life and I feel sure if you did he would leave you to yours. I bet there is a lot more to this case too, highly likely more bullying he's been through!. Zero tolerance of bullying for me!.

Topaz, so if you were the boy's mum you'd feel "scared of him and scared for him", if you were either of the girls' mum you'd be "concerned by their behaviour", but ultimately see them as the victims in the whole, sorry mess.

What if he'd killed himself, instead of turning his torment outwards? How would you feel as his/the girls mum then? Have other people who have self harmed/committed suicide been remiss because they were "safe in their houses when away from the torment"?

How would you advise your teenage boy to deal with bullies btw? Actual physical bullies as well as emotional bullies.

And what is their "excuse" for mercilessly bullying him? Agree with Monica many young people turn their anger the other way and harm or even kill themselves. If you mercilessly abuse someone they may one day snap. What happened to them was not right but they shoulder some of the blame and whether you believe it or I would be very ashamed if my daughter had behaved in that way. Of course I would also be horrified she'd been injured too.

Equally if he was my son I would be horrified by what he'd done and very worried. The girls are not innocent victims though.

He lacked the capacity to deal with these people. That is a factor of autism. Learning how to deal with this behaviour for someone with an autistic spectrum disorder may be impossible.

The best solution is to move to a naice area. He had the misfortune to live on a shitty council estate, that wasn't an option open to him.

Rage building up is also common with autistic people. He did not try to justify what he did.

Without the psycho bullies then none of this would have happened.

My brother was almost killed by a man who 'snapped' a few years ago. My brother was asleep in bed with his new girlfriend and woke up to her 'ex' kicking him in the face. When I rushed to see him in A and E he had bruises of perfect footprints on his chest and head where he'd been stamped on with force and was covered in blood. Fractured skull, broken nose.

In court it transpired the girlfriend and the 'ex' were still together (hence him having a key to her flat) and she had relentlessly cheated on him, humiliated him and abused him for years and had deliberately had my brother stay over in the full knowledge the not-so-ex might let himself in because she 'enjoyed his jealously'.

I have no doubt this bloke had been pushed to breaking point, seeing a man in bed with the woman he loved was too much, that he 'snapped' and was not thinking straight. But he didn't just give my brother a slap, he almost killed him and anyone capable of extreme violence regardless of the provocation should be in prison for the protection of others. The same applies here.

And God, did I want to hurt the man and his girlfriend because of what they put my brother and my family through. I have never felt such violent rage, I can't tell you what I fantasised doing to them both. But I didn't do it because I'm not capable of it (can most of us really picture ourselves plunging a blade into someone's face? Or stamping on their head?). And if we start to say that extreme violence can be justified 'in certain circumstances' society will be even more fucked than it is already.

My brother was almost killed by a man who 'snapped' a few years ago. My brother was asleep in bed with his new girlfriend and woke up to her 'ex' kicking him in the face. When I rushed to see him in A and E he had bruises of perfect footprints on his chest and head where he'd been stamped on with force and was covered in blood. Fractured skull, broken nose.

In court it transpired the girlfriend and the 'ex' were still together (hence him having a key to her flat) and she had relentlessly cheated on him, humiliated him and abused him for years and had deliberately had my brother stay over in the full knowledge the not-so-ex might let himself in because she 'enjoyed his jealously'.

I have no doubt this bloke had been pushed to breaking point, seeing a man in bed with the woman he loved was too much, that he 'snapped' and was not thinking straight. But he didn't just give my brother a slap, he almost killed him and anyone capable of extreme violence regardless of the provocation should be in prison for the protection of others. The same applies here.

And God, did I want to hurt the man and his girlfriend because of what they put my brother and my family through. I have never felt such violent rage, I can't tell you what I fantasised doing to them both. But I didn't do it because I'm not capable of it (can most of us really picture ourselves plunging a blade into someone's face? Or stamping on their head?). And if we start to say that extreme violence can be justified 'in certain circumstances' society will be even more fucked than it is already.

My brother was almost killed by a man who 'snapped' a few years ago. My brother was asleep in bed with his new girlfriend and woke up to her 'ex' kicking him in the face. When I rushed to see him in A and E he had bruises of perfect footprints on his chest and head where he'd been stamped on with force and was covered in blood. Fractured skull, broken nose.

In court it transpired the girlfriend and the 'ex' were still together (hence him having a key to her flat) and she had relentlessly cheated on him, humiliated him and abused him for years and had deliberately had my brother stay over in the full knowledge the not-so-ex might let himself in because she 'enjoyed his jealously'.

I have no doubt this bloke had been pushed to breaking point, seeing a man in bed with the woman he loved was too much, that he 'snapped' and was not thinking straight. But he didn't just give my brother a slap, he almost killed him and anyone capable of extreme violence regardless of the provocation should be in prison for the protection of others. The same applies here.

And God, did I want to hurt the man and his girlfriend because of what they put my brother and my family through. I have never felt such violent rage, I can't tell you what I fantasised doing to them both. But I didn't do it because I'm not capable of it (can most of us really picture ourselves plunging a blade into someone's face? Or stamping on their head?). And if we start to say that extreme violence can be justified 'in certain circumstances' society will be even more fucked than it is already.

What is my weird agenda? I am genuinely horrified by the level of violence in this attack and that the attacker will be back on the streets, probably in a couple of years. I am shocked that everyone is excusing what he did.

Well you refuse to accept that he was horrifically bullied for a start and you seem intent on mocking and minimising bullying and the effect it has on people with phrases such as 'oh what if someone looks at him wrong'. Thats not what happened.

I just want to feel safe and I don't feel safe in a society that excuses this level of violence. His reaction was totally out of proportion to being insulted. What if he gets worse and next time it's enough for someone to just look at him wrong?

Why wouldn't you feel safe? Are you a vile little bully? Are you tormenting people and now scared they might defend themselves one day? No? Then you have no more chance of being attacked/retaliated against than anyone else so grow up and stop being hysterical.

then it would have succeeded and he would have been found not guilty. He wasn't. People on here seem to be arguing that not only were the courts wrong in convicting him and sentencing after such a serious assault, but were in some way stupid and foolish in a way that the vigilante section of mumsnet are not.

Because no one has ever been unfairly convicted by the courts, and who is the 'vigilante' section? I don't wish any ill on the girls. I just dont think the boy should be in prison.

The fact that he got a knife and lured two young girls to a park with the intention of violently assaulting them (having already assaulted them and returned to his home).

Are you taking some sort of mind altering drug? Or just incapable of reading? He did not lure them. He knew they would follow him, that is all the papers have said. Have you been the subject of a case of someone dying? Because i have at work, and the papers didnt print anywhere near what happened.

I would put money on it being more likely that he had to go out, knew they would be following him to torment and abuse him so he protected himself. He would not be the first person to do this its just unfortunate that he's one that ended up using it.

Would love for his family to comment on this thread, as there are clearly so many things we don't know about him - particularly his previous issues with mental health problems.

My brother was almost killed by a man who 'snapped' a few years ago. He was in bed asleep with his very new girlfriend and woke up to being booted in the face. Her 'ex' had let himself in. My brother had a fractured skull, broken nose and bruises of perfect footprints on his chest and face where he'd been stamped on repeatedly.

In Court it transpired the girlfriend and 'ex' weren't fully split up (hence him having a key) and she had relentlessly humiliated and abused him for years. She had my brother stay the night in the full knowledge her not-so-ex might let himself in because she 'enjoyed his jealousy'.

I totally accept this man had been 'pushed to breaking point', that seeing the woman he loved in bed with someone else made him 'snap' and he wasn't thinking straight but he didn't give my brother a slap, he almost killed him. Anyone capable of such extreme violence regardless of the provocation is dangerous and should be in prison to protect others. Same applies in this case.

After seeing what my brother and my family went through I felt extreme violent rage. I can't tell you what I wanted to do to this man (and her too) but I didn't do it. Because I'm not capable of such violence and feel that if we start to say that extreme violence is acceptable 'under certain circumstances' then society is even more fucked than it already is.

My brother was almost killed by a man who 'snapped' a few years ago. He was in bed asleep with his very new girlfriend and woke up to being booted in the face. Her 'ex' had let himself in. My brother had a fractured skull, broken nose and bruises of perfect footprints on his chest and face where he'd been stamped on repeatedly.

In Court it transpired the girlfriend and 'ex' weren't fully split up (hence him having a key) and she had relentlessly humiliated and abused him for years. She had my brother stay the night in the full knowledge her not-so-ex might let himself in because she 'enjoyed his jealousy'.

I totally accept this man had been 'pushed to breaking point', that seeing the woman he loved in bed with someone else made him 'snap' and he wasn't thinking straight but he didn't give my brother a slap, he almost killed him. Anyone capable of such extreme violence regardless of the provocation is dangerous and should be in prison to protect others. Same applies in this case.

After seeing what my brother and my family went through I felt extreme violent rage. I can't tell you what I wanted to do to this man (and her too) but I didn't do it. Because I'm not capable of such violence and feel that if we start to say that extreme violence is acceptable 'under certain circumstances' then society is even more fucked than it already is.

Sorry for multiple posts! Phone had a funny five minutes!

Don't worry about it. Chaos was the queen of multiple posts before she got a new phone. We're used to it .

Neverthebride, that's an awful thing to happen and I hope your brother is ok now.

How would you have felt about the man if he'd just attacked his girlfriend on snapping though and not your brother? And would you have conceded at all that she would have had to take a portion of responsibility for tormenting someone to that extent?

What Topaz seems to be saying is that because the girls got hurt in the end, as a direct result of their actions, they are therefore blameless and are purely victims with no impunity.

I do believe the boy in this case should have been jailed, he broke the law, reacted hugely disproportionately to the situation he was in and should pay the consequence - but I cannot say that the girls were innocent victims, they should accept that they brought it on themselves to an extent. If they hadn't harassed him and then followed him to continue their torment then they would not have been hurt by him.

I have sympathy for the boy, and zero for the girls in this situation I'm afraid.

I don't think he was wrong ly convicted. Neither do I think he was "right" to respond in that way. However, neither do I agree that the girls were innocent victims in the way that your poor brother was. Just because I believe the bullies behaved despicably does not mean I think the boy should go unpunished.

No, I don't think the girls were 'innocent victims' at all. They sound like horrible, horrible people.

I just can't think that extreme violence is ever justified. I can see why people would think that and I've thought it myself when some horrible shit does awful things and there don't seem to be any consequences but I just think we're all (as humans) screwed if we start to think that's a solution.

With the situation with my brother, I did have a couple of people offer to give the bloke 'a kicking'. I was sorely tempted. Really. I wanted him to be in pain, I wanted him to be in fear of his life, to be humiliated - all the things he'd inflicted on my brother.

But what kind of person would that have made me?. And I saw the fear and pain my Mum went through seeing her child like that. His attacker is a vile excuse for a man in my opinion but there are people that love him, he's got a Mum. Did his family deserve to be in pain because of my vengeance?. I didn't think so.

I just don't think spreading the violence and pain around gets us anywhere in the long run.

monicalewinski

"What Topaz seems to be saying is that because the girls got hurt in the end, as a direct result of their actions, they are therefore blameless and are purely victims with no impunity."

What Topaz also seems to be saying is that because they where girls they are completely innocent.

no its not an excuse at all.. i say that as some one was bulled from primary all the way to collage.

i once had a boy bring in a knife when i was 14.. he had a little group with him ..trying to handed it to me and told me to kill myself...

i would expect to get jail time if i had took it and stabed him in the face!

also the fact it was planned. he didnt lash out there and then.. he planned it.

so whilst i think bullying ir horrendouse and should be taken more seriousely... what he did.. was unforgivable!

"so whilst i think bullying ir horrendouse and should be taken more seriousely"

do you believe that bullying is also unforgivable?

Neither do I. I agree with you.