To ask should smacking children be banned.

[HadABadDay2014]

Just seen this on the welsh news.

I am not perfect and once I have smacked ds felt awful and never did it again.

Now I know if this was a patient at work or a member of the public I would had been arrested and highly likely ended up with a criminal record and lost my job.

So the question is should snaking children be banned.

Yes, it should be banned. Smacking seems to either be the parent losing control of themselves in a moment of emotion/danger, or to be 'measured smacking' which is calm, controlled hitting as a punishment. Both to me are quite clearly wrong.

Smacking is not necessary for good discipline. I am quite a strict parent compared to most of my peers, and I've never smacked. Consistency, clear rules and sensible controls do the job.

Why is smacking less 'fair and reasonably (sic)' than other forms of discipline?

Because it's physical violence, Irene. People have a right not to be hit, even (especially?) small ones.

How is hitting anyone or anything fair and reasonable, in this society it is illegal, except for children.

People have a right not to be hit, even (especially?) small ones.

Not a legal right in the circumstances we are discussing(FACT)
.
So a moral right? Come on, convince me while a smack is less morally right than sending to the room, confiscating toy, time out?

You really need someone to convince you that hitting a child is unacceptable Irene

Do you usually hit people who don't do as you ask or who have done something wrong in your eyes?

I haven't read the entire thread but I think we should replace the word smacking with 'hitting' - smacking seems more innocuous somehow. It is hitting and you wouldn't accept it if someone hit you.

Because hitting is a far more emotive word than smacking and implies far greater force, that's why it's being used her.

The odd smack for very very serious offences in otherwise loving parenting won't do any lasting harm and usually teaches a child who is disregarding your other attempts at discipline (naughty corner, telling off, talking to etc) that a boundary is being crossed.

Compared to neglectful parenting where children are given into for the sake of peace and quiet, ignored and left watching TV and video games all their free time and parents who can't be bothered to interact with their children is far more harmful.

Why have there been several threads about smacking in recent days? Often with the same exact posts from the same posters. Is it journos fishing for quotes?

Anyway, smacking is ineffective, counterproductive, morally wrong and particularly reprehensible when done to a smaller, more vulnerable, developing and dependent person (ie a child). People who deliberately choose to smack will not agree with this however, and won't be persuaded of it - if anyone wants to be persuaded then I will of course attempt to explain my reasoning.

I find the insistence that choosing not to smack will (or has) produced hordes of precious, spoilt and badly behaved children to be particularly ridiculous. There's zero evidence for this, and in addition the people putting this argument forward seem to think that there are only two parenting approaches - authoritarian smacking, versus permissive and indulgent parenting. When in fact it is perfectly possible to parent firmly and with authority without having to resort to physical violence.

I think this thread was well bumped from ages ago and then just carried on.

There's probably a spanking perv on the prowl.... yuck.

Hitting, physical violence ...let's be throwing them against walls next.

A sharp tap of the leg half a dozen times in their lifetime isn't going to harm anyone.

Giving in to a child's every whim, letting them run riot. No discipline whatsoever or ineffective discipline is more likely to result in entitled children.

Rjae... Choosing not to smack does not mean indulgent permissive parenting and badly behaved children. Its perfectly possible to be firm and authoritative, and to enforce boundaries, without needing to use smacking.

It should be banned. Using any form of corporal punishment means you have lost control of the situation or have a bizarre belief violence is the only way to get the point across to a small child. In The Netherlands where I live smacking is also illegal. I haven't noticed any dire results for the nation's continued success as a result. There don't seem to be generations of delinquent adults all struggling because they weren't physically disciplined when younger.

I remember a friend over from New Zealand discussing the introduction of the smacking ban. She mentioned an incident where she grabbed her son and started to soak him saying 'don't you dare thump your sister'. And then, abruptly stopped whilst thinking of the smacking ban and, just perhaps, there was a point to what the government was trying to do. She never used any physical punishment against her kids ever again and said that actually it improved the family dynamic and relationships between the children as a result.

No, you can't police everyone with the introduction of a smacking ban. But it will at the very least provoke discussion and debate and get people thinking. And even, hopefully, joining up the dots on their own accord (which I think would be the main objective).

Soak?? Smack!

Giving in to a child's every whim, letting them run riot. No discipline whatsoever or ineffective discipline is more likely to result in entitled children.

Are you saying the only effective form of discipline is physical?

Do you usually hit people who don't do as you ask or who have done something wrong in your eyes?

When people post things like this, it makes me wonder if they understand what the role of 'parent' is

No I don't smack say a neighbour if they piss me off, but neither do I send them to their room or confiscate their car

Grandchildren are occasionally threatened with a smack and sometimes given one by their parents.

I think children were so much better behaved and had better manners and attititudes at school when caning or belting was allowed.

Hopefully you don't hit your kids just because they're pissing you off either.

I think people ought to be mindful of what they are discussing considering several threads of this nature have been recently bumped which may not be for entirely innocent reasons.

(Against my better judgement...) IreneA78, what do you think the role of a parent is, if you object to the comparison? Do you think it is possible to effectively parent a child without smacking?

How is it any different Irene?
Whether it is your child or someone else, they have still done something wrong. Why is it ok to hit a child but not someone else if they have both done wrong? Just because you are a parent?
As a parent you are dealing with a transgression...yes? So if a friend of yours did something wrong you would deal with it without hitting? Why?

I think children were so much better behaved and had better manners and attititudes at school when caning or belting was allowed.

Irene, do you believe in hitting animals too? Dogs? Horses? When they don't do as commanded?

Do you think it is possible to effectively parent a child without smacking?
yes

Irene, do you believe in hitting animals too? Dogs? Horses? When they don't do as commanded?
Hmm I don't know.I am not really an animal person so havcen't really formed an opinion on that.