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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU to think this is quite cheeky?

100 replies

Sammie101 · 11/02/2014 15:31

So I probably shouldn't be so bothered/astounded at this but I am sad and don't have much else to do except fathom some of the things that other people do (and put on Facebook!)

An old friend of mine from school recently got engaged. There were lots of pictures, articles online and in the newspaper (it was a very public proposal) and after the initial "oh so and so is engaged, that's nice" it got a bit irritating.

Anyway! Just saw before on Facebook that said friend has posted a status and link on her Facebook saying something along the lines of:

We already live together, we don't want 17 blenders. We would kindly appreciate help towards the cost of our wedding. Obviously we have to start this earlier as things need to be paid for.

Obviously this was said more eloquently than I put it but you get the jist.

AIBU to think that essentially asking people fund your wedding is a bit cheeky? The donation page is set up so that anyone can donate, even though they might not even be invited to the wedding (although people most likely wouldn't donate unless they were sure they'd be invited)

My friend put her goal as 7k! I think that if you want to have the whole shebang you do what everyone else does and save up for it. She mentions on her donation page that having children means they'd be saving years but that's a reality for most couples. It just irritated me because I thought it was cheeky.

I'm probably being unreasonable and sh

OP posts:
ATruthUniversallyAcknowledged · 11/02/2014 20:30

Maybe the news page could do a follow up article and then even people she doesn't know could donate.

LaGuardia · 11/02/2014 21:29

I want a new kitchen. I might set up a fundraising page now. She is a cheeky fecker.

Pipbin · 11/02/2014 21:31

Am I alone in thinking that if someone wants to get married then thats lovely, but don't expect me to give a shit or money?
When I got married I didn't assume that anyone beyond our parents would care really. Yet so many people seem to carry on like getting married it the single most important event in all human history and we should all pay for it.

YoureBeingASillyBilly · 11/02/2014 21:34

Arghhh!

SHE'S NOT GETTING MARRIED TO HERSELF!

Where are the remarks directed at her fiance?

they are asking for the money. they are benefitting from it. Its not just her!

deakymom · 11/02/2014 21:41

cheeky as hell i would never do that!! i was forced into having a "gift list" by my mother no one bought me anything off it because they were not expensive enough! they all gave me gift vouchers instead so i bought a £300 tv flat screen light as anything!

MrsTerryPratchett · 12/02/2014 01:58

Silly the OP refers to this as an old friend. I assumed she didn't know the fiancé who may not have been engaged 4 times...

Mellowandfruitful · 12/02/2014 02:02

Cheeky and indeed grabby. Also, 7K? That's outrageous!

YoureBeingASillyBilly · 12/02/2014 02:18

Its not the OPs comments im talking about.

Chottie · 12/02/2014 02:53

The last wedding we went to, the couple had been living together for years so had a home and everything to go in. They asked for contributions to their honeymoon (two places, one hot and one cold) and listed a lot of experiences that you could buy for them.....

expatinscotland · 12/02/2014 08:36

Two honeymoons? FFS.

elQuintoConyo · 12/02/2014 11:15

It never ceases to amaze me how crass people can be about their wedding.

Two honeymoons? Help to pay for the wedding? Having six bridesmaids dressed as Barbie vomit and expecting the bridesmaids to pay for it themselves, Tidydance'rs Gluezilla?

Utter weirdos!

Sammie101 · 12/02/2014 11:20

The gluezilla story amazed me! Reading some threads on mumsnet I can't believe some people can act the way they do, but then I came across someone like that myself!

Hope if I ever get married I don't turn into crazy bridezilla Confused

OP posts:
AnyaKnowIt · 12/02/2014 11:27

I was invited to my cousins wedding a few years ago.

Only to find out that too many people were there so they sold raffle tickets to see the wedding. If you didn't win a ticket you had to wait outside.

ShadowFall · 12/02/2014 12:06

Really Anya?

You had to pay to enter a raffle to see a wedding that you'd been invited to?

That's terrible. Surely any bride & groom with sense will either hire a venue large enough for everyone they want to invite, or they prune the guest list down until the number of guests will fit inside the venue they want!

UncleT · 12/02/2014 12:09

I would donate precisely one penny. Or, as suggested, a blender - a really crap one though.

AnyaKnowIt · 12/02/2014 12:13

Yep we only found out when we arrived.

Really pissed me of as dd was only a baby then and we had travelled over 2hrs. All they had to say was they had over booked and would you mind coming a bit later.

I got back in my car and drove back home. Felt sorry for other guest and there was no where warm to wait, no shops about to get a drink or something to eat.

Thumbwitch · 12/02/2014 12:30

Wow Anya, that just about tops anything I've ever read about weddings! Shock

How in fuck does anyone overbook a wedding?? ShockHmm

ShadowFall · 12/02/2014 12:38

Well, I guess you could overbook a wedding if, for instance, your venue was big enough for 200 people, and then you invited 250 people because you assumed at least 50 people would be unable to attend - and then all 250 invitees accepted the invite.

But to try and solve a problem like that - assuming that's what may have happened - by selling raffle tickets to your guests is just insane, and insulting to the guests.

Thumbwitch · 12/02/2014 12:40

Oh I agree you could but I just can't imagine anyone in their right mind doing so!

AnyaKnowIt · 12/02/2014 12:57

I can see how you do over book a wedding, but at least warn people before they travel. Or have somewhere comfortable to stay just not kicked out and told to come back later.

Thumbwitch · 12/02/2014 13:00

Or have another wedding on standby for those who arrive too late to get into the first one... Wink

AnyaKnowIt · 12/02/2014 13:03

Haha

They could have filmed it and sold the dvds.

Gladvent · 12/02/2014 13:10

Is it a public fundraising page? I'd donate 10p with a little poem alongside it.

FrankieStien · 12/02/2014 13:16

What a pair of grabby twats they are!

Sammie101 · 12/02/2014 13:52

It's a public go fund me page, however I don't know if you can donate anonymously, or else I'd donate a penny and include a nice little poem Grin

Selling raffle tickets to a wedding?! I've heard it all now Confused

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