Am I being unreasonable to dislike this response to my status?

[Finsmum86]

Me and my partner have banter about him not clearing up, me being a nag etc. It is only a joke, which I would have thought is pretty standard husband/wife banter.

I put a status today saying 'After waiting six days for the bathroom to be cleaned, I am doing it myself. Men!'

I meant it in jest, and other comments from friends were along the lines of 'i wouldnt trust my husband to clean the bathroom' and 'they do it on purpose so we don't ask them again'. All in a lighthearted manner, with said husbands joining in. My partner did not comment, as his phone is broken so does not have immediate access, although I told him about it, and we were laughing about the comments.He was not annoyed in any way.

A few hours later, I noticed a comment on said status from partners aunty saying 'I dont see my nephew criticising you on facebook. It doesnt make you look good.'

Now I am shocked and a bit annoyed because we were having a joke, and partner was laughing along too. I have always had a distant friendly relationship (she lives far away) with her, with no issues.

I removed her comment and replied to her via inbox, saying sorry she was offended but my comment was in jest and that I think she has found fault were there isn't any. I also sent her a link of a past status of OH's where he had made a joke about me nagging him (which she had actually liked!).


Was I being unreasonable to post this status, or is she being unreasonable?

[NaffOrf]

Love the way OP and her(female) relative are at each other's throats while the man is still not cleaning the bathroom.

Op, your problem is not your aunt, or Facebook, it's your lazy, pisstaking dp. What is he doing while you two fight like a pair of fishwives?

[JumpingJackSprat]

That status was sexist and not funny. Not sure why your friends found it oh so hilarious but from the sounds of it they're sexist too. I'm with your aunt.

[He11y]

It's your wall so up to you what you post - some people don't have a sense of humour and/or think they have the right to dictate to others.

I'd change the settings so she is still a friend but can't see any more posts.

[JapaneseMargaret]

I wouldn't for the life of me comment in a status like that (so SWBU), but, my God, I would roll my eyes.

I have zero time for women enablers whose feckless husbands expect to be picked up after, and skivvied around.

There is one person like this on my FB (she doesn't do it often, to be fair). I judge her, and I judge her lump of a husband.

Likewise, I judge you, and your lump of a husband. It matters not - I am a nameless, faceless Internet random and it's no skin off your nose what I think, right?

But believe me, a status like that will have plenty of people thinking you're a bit of a mug.

[FanFuckingTastic]

I think you are being a bit sensitive. I posted something yesterday and commented about it afterwards that I'd posted it "to infuriate my mum" and one of her friends got upset. I just pointed out to her that I love my mum and it was a jokey kind of post, not at all serious. I didn't think she was out of order, she didn't understand it is all. I just set her straight and nothing more.

[perplexedpirate]

Is 6 days ok between bathroom cleans? I would feel hideous trying to get myself clean in a dirty room.

(Disclaimer: am recovering OCD person, my thinking on this is almost certainly batshit)

[TantrumsAndBalloons]

Surely if you choose to post stuff about your relationship on FB, you are inviting people to comment?

Ok, maybe you didn't like what she said. Either suck it up or stop posting about your dp on FB.

And fwiw, I work hard. DH works hard. Doesn't mean either of us are exempt from being adults when we get home from work and making sure stuff is done in the house.

Being a man doesn't actually biologically mean unable to see dirt or unable to clean "properly"
That sort of ridiculous remark annoys me, sorry

[Kikithecat]

When you post on FB you are saying the same thing to everyone you know (on there) like shouting from the rooftops. I for one choose who I want to talk to about any given subject, hence very few status updates!

[Trills]

YABU and sexist to write "Men" like that.

[Trills]

I agree with his aunt that it is petty and childish to complain about your partner loudly and in public like that.

By all means have a private moan with some carefully-selected friends, but what you are doing is the equivalent of standing up and shouting at a party (where he is also present).

If he has done similar before that doesn't make what you've done any better, it just means that he is also petty and childish.

[Mrswellyboot]

Sibu but I wouldn't write that on FB. It is a joke between you. People are judgemental. There is a girl on FB who is always moaning about her new baby and I totally get it.. The sleepless nights etc (in same boat) but mutual friends are bitching about her.

Is awful, but its what people do.

[Finsmum86]

I understand that what I said was a bit sexist, but I honestly meant it in a light hearted way, and I think the comments underneath reflected that. I will think more carefully in the future.

But I think what annoyed me more is the fact that she liked a previous status of his about me being a nag (again lighthearted). So it is one rule for him and one for me.

[Finsmum86]

Anyway, mix of opinions here, thanks all. It is not really that important, just wanted other people's perspective. To be clear, I am aware that all men are not the same.

[themessyapron]

Lighthearted sexism you say? Still not cool

[flowery]

I agree with her assessment that it doesn't make you look good.

Odd to assume that as your DP is lazy then it's because he is male and also odd to therefore assume all men are the same.

I imagine the aunt had no way of knowing you were joking, or perhaps has a different sense of humour to you.

I also wouldn't dream of criticising my DH in public that way, joking or not, so while your DP may be fine with it, perhaps his aunt would also feel criticising one's partner in public is a bit off.

[flowery]

X posts

[normalishdude]

I endorse and agree with what Flowery has said

[KatoPotato]

You said 'banter'

YABU

[MrsGoslingWannabe]

YABU to put such petty things on FB and to care that DP's aunt liked his status about you.

[Mishmashfamily]

moomins analogy was spot on and am sorry trills you are that fart moving stealthy around MN on to 'light hearted' threads

You probably won't see the humour in my post either

[Trills]

If people are going to be "light-heartedly" sexist then they will have to get used to being told that they are being sexist.

[Mishmashfamily]

finsmum I dared to start a lighthearted thread and the the humour killers came too

[Mishmashfamily]

mrs I don't think op cared,it was just proving a point.