self entitled middle class??

[sweetsoulsister]

As an 'out of towner' can people explain why the middle class in this fine city of London feel they are so god damned righteous?

I'm standing in a queue with my children at the local swimming pool, and judging by the car park, it's busy. We go in and join a long queue. A couple of the families in front of me take their turn at the counter, turn around in disgust, and pace back and forth, argue with each other and work themselves up into a frenzy. Assuming they are going swimming I ask what has happened with the pool. One of the ladies says, 'The pool is at capacity and if we want to go in we will have to wait until someone leaves,' her voice rises another octave and she continues, 'This is completely unacceptable!!'

Really? Unacceptable? If you were the first family in the pool and it got too crowded because they let everyone in would you just suck it up because it's unacceptable to let everyone in?

This is not the first time I've encountered this outrage and it always seems to be what I've deemed the 'self entitled middle class...'

Explanations please???

Compos I just don't care really, find it both boring and hilarious depending in my mood.

really who cares what people read? which radio station they listen to? if they like footi or rugby? what they do for a living? what car they drive and the most most boring how much is their house worth?

seriously who bloody cares. if you are an entitled rude twat then you just are. if you are nice then you just are.

nowt to go with 'class'

compos well I'm a Guardian reading radio 4 listener and whilst I've never shot one I've cleaned and eaten many a pheasant.

It was OH who went on the organised tour to Libya, but at 56 he was one of the younger ones , the rest being well off older people. I met 2 of them and they were Telegraph rather than Guardian readers.

But I agree the middle class is more heterogeneous than the OP thinks.

I'll add another to my list, not being hung up about germs. Some of the anxiety I see on here about use by dates and spraying every surface with dettox strikes me as very lower middle class.

Genuine helpful point about AIBU

If you ask a question, and then appear to think you ABU, and also a little bit judgy, it is absolutely fine and ok to disagree. But never ever ever disagree by saying that people are being/sound defensive. Just don't, ever. Really, really, please, don't.

As you profess interested in psychology etc op this is a helpful hint for you to carry with you for all future AIBUs.

And then *posters think you ABU.

SweetSoulSister - I was once with a group of American / English sociologist friends, and they all agreed that class in the UK is equivalent in role to race in the US. Does that help? They also suggest that people in the UK say that they aren't aware of class, or say that they don't see themselves as of being of any particular class, or think that class is irrelevant, in the same way that people in the US would say that they think that race is irrevelant.

A recent study suggests that people in the UK like to say that they are from a lower class than they might externally be judged to be - it is seen as more culturally acceptable to describe yourself as working class than it is as middle class. I'm quite happy to say I'm middle class, but that's because my mum is an anthropologist from overseas, so I grew up with her outsider's perspective on it, and see believes in calling a middle class digging implement a spade.

Interestingly, the recent study also says that there is an emerging cultural stereotype of 'the middle class' which needs someone to be in the top income bracket to achieve the lifestyle. Skiing, landrovers, private schools, large house in the country, etc are all now popularly described as classic middle class markers, whereas in fact they're unaffordable to most people who are classified by sociologists as middle class.

The thing that I think is very interesting is that as an outsider looking at the UK, you've picked up this more recent redefinition of the middle class, as being the wealthy landrover owning class. My guess from what you've said of your background is that you would be classified as a middle class person yourself, but the lentil-weaving University sort, rather than the landrover-driving red-trousered sort.

Does that help, somewhat?

op, what on earth makes you think someone on here will be able to explain why a woman in a queue you were in was rude and obnoxious?

we werent in the queue, we dont know!

we've all came across rude people, surely as an adult you have too?

its hardly rocket science

I think you op have far more issues with class than anyone else.

Get over yourself

I'm middle class. Probably.

I drive a rusting, ancient Fiesta and husband drives a C Max, which is slightly grubby and over 8 years old.

I know I'm a bit late to the party, but just felt the need to mention this.

obviously then for the uninitiated being 'middle class' strikes me as being terrified of being judged by others and judging others in equal measure.

so you all have check lists to prove to yourselves and others that you are indeed 'middle class' .

my sister reads the guardian and listens to radio 4. she is a senior teacher, lives in Kent, goes to plays and is a member if the Labour Party!! so now I know why she looks down on me. bless.

Oh if we're going for definitions then I'm middle class because I do have tattoos but they don't have any spelling mistakes.

Recently encountered exactly the same situation with dd and ds in tow. Didn't go as far as saying it was unacceptable but did find it rather annoying all the same. DD cried :( We only had a limited amount of time so it meant they couldn't swim at all.

We don't live in London though

I've been to Libya. However, we have FOUR TV's.

I think the best handbook for understanding class in this country is Jilly Cooper's 'Class.'
She pokes fun at all of us, and the inconsistencies and oddities we encounter every day.

now Honey if I actually did consider class I would say tattoos are common. that's my mothers phrase. but my dss both have large ones on their arms.

they are Chinese symbols though so haven't a clue what they say. probably fuck off or some such.

Oh good point Crowler, I have a tv in my kitchen. Mind you that may be levelled out by also owning a bread maker?

hang on is Bowden middle class? ds wears it. super dry too.

I like George at ASDA and Primark. wouldn't be seen dead at a council pool though as pay fees for a gym with a pool.

it's a right palava this.

dsis not ds

I am established middle class, arf
I was brought up in a very deprived mining community for heaven's sake
What aoad of old tosh

Oh good point Crowler, I have a tv in my kitchen. Mind you that may be levelled out by also owning a bread maker?

You need a special category.

I have no idea what class I am. I started out as firmly working class but I have a degree, listen to the Archers, never watch commercial televsion and am a friend of the British Museum. So middle class right? Except I talk with a Midland accent, love gravy on chips, and have a tattoo.

So I'm confused.

I do, however, know that whatever class I am, I find some situations annoying and say so.

So OP, YABU

Well the op is interested in phycology and has coined the term self entitled middle class. But I'm assuming the land rover identified the family as middle class, and the behaviour as self entitled.

So we need to ascertain what behaviour and products mark one as middle class

And what behaviour and products mark one has self entitled middle class

And whether geographical placement to the Capital city affects status.

Once that's all sorted we can then move forward and discuss the ops reasonableness.

I think we're going to need a bigger thread...

see i think superdyr was ok but now it is super chav

I love my Superdry hoodies, nothing better on a cold wet day.

ffs OP you need to look up Tajfel's theory of in groups and out groups.

It relates to personal identity theory and social identity - it tends to be covered in depth at level 2 degree modules. His orginal study has been replicated and can applied theoretica to a lot of situations.

Please dont think about natinal identity as it gets even more complex as the UK and GB have a complex make-up of regional, national and colonial identities.

However I dont think a sense of entitlement can be correlated to a particular class. As some one said up thread in a non academic way those people were just twats

Honey I worked in a secondary school. A lot of the kids had the superdry coats, it kinda spoilt it for me DH still wears his orginal t shirt.