to believe, and be heartbroken by Woody Allens step-daughters testimony

[fromparistoberlin]

kristof.blogs.nytimes.com/2014/02/01/an-open-letter-from-dylan-farrow/

I read this last night and it just about broke my heart

I believe her, and I am just so saddened by it

How the hell did he not get prosecuted

brave brave girl, and I feel awful as I have watched and enkoyed his films, even knowing of this murky tale in the background

Was MF wrong to have a relationship with FS then?

mothership are you saying she cannot be lying?

I can imagine the reactions, rightly, if a woman posted on here that she had just found out her 50 year old male partner of some years, was leaving her for her 17 year old daughter. There would be absolute outrage at his behaviour.

I can imagine the reactions, rightly, if a woman posted on here that she had just found out her 50 year old male partner of some years, was leaving her for her 17 year old daughter. There would be absolute outrage at his behaviour

Yes, but this is MN, hardly the bastion of considered, rational thought, and on MN the OW is by definition a painted jezebel.

Also "Daughter" here is stretching the definition by a country mile as well.

I do note that Allen and Soon Yi have been together for 23 years as well, so clearly big age gap marriages can work.

If it was a 50 year old woman with a 19 year old boy we'd all be congratulating her.

mothership I really haven't seen a post from anyone who doesn't think it was reprehensible but it does not in any way make him guilty of child abuse.

His quote (from Emily Dickinson) "the heart wants what it wants" was his way of explaining that he fell in love with SY, not some excuse for just doing whatever he wanted.

Having said that, he clearly was living on another planet if he thought there was no issue with SY being the adopted daughter of MF. content.time.com/time/magazine/article/0,9171,160439,00.html

bumble What do you mean wrong? As I stated early I would be concerned about any relationship with such a big age gap where one of people in it was very young.

dinky Of course not, not sure what gave you that impression.

Lazy Grennie was referring to the relationship between Mia Farrow and Soon Yi, not WA.

Yes lazy it is all types of grim, wrong and creepy. But for better or worse it isn't illegal and it certainly isn't any form of definitive proof that woody allen abused his seven year old child.

Sorry greenie not lazy.

winter Of course it doesn't make him guilty but it does show that he is prepared to cross family boundaries that others would find unacceptable. And he didn't seem to understand why anyone would have a problem with that.

The judge said he was patently unable to put the needs of his children above his own desires, he was obsessive about monopolising Dylan to the detriment of his other children and to the extent that she tried to avoid him.

All of which point towards a very unhealthy, entitled attitude, which in no way prove the truth of Dylan's statement but can't help but lend it credibility.

dinky Speak for yourself, I would be just as uncomfortable if the young person was a boy and especially if the woman involved was his father's partner.

The people contributing to this thread are not a jury, this is not a court.

I don't think anyone on this thread has said they have definitive proof that Allen is guilty.

People are merely expressing opinions.

I personally have said that he has almost no credibility when it comes to relationships and boundaries. He has showed that on several occasions. The interview that winter posted a couple of posts up is pretty appalling/damning.

On that basis alone; i.e. his almost total lack of credibility, I am inclined to believe Dylan.

Large age gaps with consenting adults does not equate to pedophilia. Some may find it morally wrong or a bit but it is not illegal and does not indicate an underlying psychiatric disorder.

Woody Allen is an incredibly selfish, self-centered man, and a terrible father.

Nobody can disagree with that.

Bumbly I would say that FS was wrong to have a relationship with MF, yes. I can't imagine that it was really a relationship of two equals, especially as he was a huge star at the time.

I would in no way 'congratulate' a 50 year old for having a relationship with a 19 year old, regardless of relative genders, and find it interesting that you should use the word. To me this sums up the problem really, the idea that an older person who catches a younger one has in some way 'done well'. My dh's cousin at 17 was in a relationship with a woman in her 30s who had children almost as old as him and even in my twenties I knew that was very very wrong. It was not a good or healthy relationship for him and I could not believe that his mother sanctioned it.

I am in my early forties and the idea of going out with someone who I would essentially think of as a child is really quite disturbing.

Where has anyone said a large age gap equates to paedophilia?

Besides, we're not talking about a mere age gap.

And no, I certainly would not be congratulating a 50YO woman for entering into a relationship with a 19YO man. What an odd assertion.

Many here are using Woodys relationship with Soon-Yi to support Dylan's accusations. They are very separate issues.

Yes, indeed, people here are using Allen's relationship with Soon-Yi to help form their overall opinion of the man.

Why wouldn't they...?

They are not separate, I have a stepchild who is now 18, the thought of even considering a relatonship with him ever is repulsive. It makes me feel sick as sick as having a relationship with my brother or children.

In fact having sexual thoughts about someone I have known as a child and watched grow up even if not related is imo is deeply strange and wrong. And would make me question someones moral compass.

You'll get someone rushing on now to say, 'but he wasn't actually her step-father', as if splitting that particular hair somehow makes it acceptable.

YY Japanese Closely followed by someone saying that FS may be Ronan's biological father so that makes it ok that the other man he thought was his father had an affair with his teenage sister.

dinky Really? You think it's ok for a man to start an affair with his partner's daughter who is at least 30 years his junior and a teenager who had a difficult start to her life, really? that's ok? It's not illegal, she was above the age of consent so it's all good?

And what Treacle said.

It's very sad.

But I do believe Dylan.

What about Moses Farrows account of his brainwashing mother? Do you believe him?

I think WA is definitely an abuser. I believe Dylan.