to pop a note through dead neighbours door to ask if the car is for sale

[VeraZera]

The occupant of a house a few doors down from me has died. Family were there last week clearing stuff out etc. Curtains have been closed since then. I didn't know the person who lived there, but know he drove a car which is now parked on the drive. I need another car as mine won't last much longer and this would seem a decent low vehicle.

WIBU to pop a note through the door to the family expressing condolences and asking if the car is for sale?

Definitely wouldn't, in fact I couldn't ever see myself doing this. "Erm...sorry for your loss, what's happening to his car?"

Reminds me of a joke:

Doctor: The bad news is we are going to have to amputate both your legs.
Patient: And the good news?
Doctor: The man in the next bed wants to buy your slippers.

I would put through a note saying 'very sorry for your loss... but your loss could be my vehicular gain. I'm judt dying to get my hand on your recently deceased relative's car. 2 grand and I'm killing myself.

I'm sure your actions won't be seen as tactless and crass at all. Why not put the cherry on the cake? Go down to the cemetery in your tap shoes and do the soft shoe shuffle on the deceased grave?

Have a word with yourself op

Reminds me of Ross from Friends trying to get his hands on an apartment when he hears the woman is at deaths door.

Yes I think it's fine. Send a tasteful "With deepest sympathy, can I buy your motor?" card.

Oh, hang on...

Good god no.

The only thing you should put through the door is a sympathy card.

If you want to buy the car you need to speak to the family in person in a sensitive way. I would say something along the lines of 'Im so sorry for your loss. It must be hard to clearning things away. Im home if you need a break, just knock on my door.' If they open up then you can ask what their plans are for the car. If they knock on the door make them the best cup of tea and give them lots of bicscuts. If they say nothing I would leave it alone.

The only note you should be 'popping' through the door should be one of condolence. Hth.

Dear God just find a different car

You're going to come across as a vulture otherwise

Hmmm - no. No. Not at all wise. Just don't.

Yeah, there are a million cars out there for sale, go get one of those. I think some people just have a brain fart and think this sort of thing would be a good idea. I worry about some people. Ok, I'd maybe have a fleeting thought in these circumstances but no way on earth would I follow it through.

If you don't ask, you don't get!

Whether it's tasteful or appropriate or not, well, probably not. But I still stand by if you don't ask....

Please don't do this. Hideously insensitive.

I take it that you think you will get a good cheap deal on the car rather than buying one of the thousands up for sale in autotrader. So yes you would come across as a vulture.

Just do it. Practically they need rid of car. Just preface note with condolences and apologise for note as no other way to contact then.

You are a stranger. This is a really, really awful thing to do in the circumstances.

Sorry. The only reason you're doing it, from what I can see, is to get a cheap deal and cash in on their loss.

Which is shabby.

I really, really wouldn't. You don't come across as having much understanding of social etiquette. Not the done thing. At all.

Zen how do you know they need to get rid of the car?

Very insensitive.
They may already have plans for the car anyway.
I remember clearing my mum's council house with stuff going into the skip, and a woman coming up nosing in the skip and asking if the house was now available.
I was not impressed.

Is this a joke/reverse thread ?

We've been executors a couple if times and tbh it's been a relief when people have expressed interest in buying things. Winding up somebody's estate isn't easy and it time consuming.

By having a quick chat you can ascertain the personality of that person and decide whether to ask about the car.

I'd have loved someone to want my mother's car when she died last year, it would have saved us some hassle at a fraught time. We've had an offer on my FIL's car (he died 2 months ago) and were happy to be approached, but unfortunately we are too early in the probate process to have considered it. It would have made the recent flooding of said car one less problem too.

My dads car and this was no doubt will be part of his affects, they can't sell it anyway as it could be left to somebody in the will.
I couldn't do this, especially not so soon.
Poor mans hardly cold and you'd be seen as a vulture.

i would wait till you see the, outside

When my grandad died, 7 people inhis sheltered housing complex asked my dad if the car was for sale. My dad was quite upset by their grabby nature (some of them were after his furniture too). And they were all after a "good deal" to "save the bother" of advertising it.in the end my dad gave the car away rather than selling it. And the furniture (most of it only a year old) was donated to a charity that helps young people leaving care furnish their first homes.

I would be very cautious about approaching them but if you feel you can just remember they are grieving. Have respect and don't make a silly offer thinking you'll get a bargain.