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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Ok so im a bitch , but am u being an unreasonably heartless bitch ??

78 replies

Oohlookakitty · 16/01/2014 22:23

Name Changed as im a regular and not sure how this is going to go chicken Blush

Right so i have been seeing this bloke for around a year now , He is nice yadaa yadaa but their is a few things niggling me and im not so sure wether to say anything or if aibu .

He is 30yo and im 27 we dont live together but see each other as often as possible as we live in neighbouring towns .

His very elderly and very ill 89yo Grandad died recently (6th jan) , he was given 24 hours to live on the 1st december , I told partner to spend as much time as possible with him etc and not to worry about me anyway to my point .
fast forward to now partner is ringing me everyday saying his grandads death was so unexpected etc and he cant cope and while at work today he told customers to fuck off so was sent home .

Now i understand he is grieving which is obvious as his grandad has just died but seriously their is a time and a place and speaking to people that way and treating people like dirt and expecting them to do whatever you want and be where ever you say just because of this is ridiculous .

He keeps expecting me to cancel whatever i am doing despite it being important (lots of court dates and important meetings etc) and go to his so he can cry on my shoulder about how unexpected it was etc it just makes me so angry Angry

It wasn't unexpected he was given plenty of time to spend time with him and make his peace etc .
I wasn't given that chance with any of my 4 grandparents as they all died unexpectedly , So to be given that chance to know his Grandad was dying was a good thing iyswim (sorry i can't think of a better way to phrase it) .

He is just crying constantly everyday and when he is not crying he is playing on his god dam playstation instead of seeking help for his grief and expecting me to shoulder everything when i have enough on my plate and when i ring/message him it starts all over again and i feel like shouting 'Man up' Sad

I said he could have one of my Cats Kittens to keep him company and try to cheer him up and because i were unable to drop it round this week due to me been very ill he has gone mental at me because i couldn't manage the 2 hour bus ride with an 8 week old kitten while trying not to vomit, so he rings me saying right ill be their in half an hour for the kitten while am in an important meeting and then went mad when i were not home [hhm] All which he blames on the grief from his Grandad dying .

Sorry for the rambling its just really bugging me .

So am i a completely heartless bitch and do i need to be more sympathetic ??
I probably am but i just needed to get this out of my head

Awaits flaming

OP posts:
Oohlookakitty · 17/01/2014 00:47

Vamp he said he didn't give the doctor the right answers Confused

I asked him to elaborate but he didn't

OP posts:
kickassangel · 17/01/2014 01:02

Make him some bunting out of red flags that he can wear as a scarf; hand it over as a leaving gift.

sorry to sound glib, but he is displaying some real red flags, and he gets drinking money from his mum at the age of 30? Not exactly coming across as a mature and independent adult. I'm sure he can be lovely when he gets whatever he wants, but he is not acting well under this stress.

Oohlookakitty · 17/01/2014 01:07

kick Grin oh n the drinking money ain't even the half of it

OP posts:
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