To be infuriated by a lunchtime supervisor's comment to my daughter

[Mumofhree]

My daughter is 4 years old and started school in September.

Every day I lovingly make her a packed lunch with a selection of items so she can choose what she would like to eat that day. Some of it she eats and some of it is eaten after school. They only have a 20 minute window to eat their lunch and they can't eat that fast anyway.

My problem is that a lunchtime supervisor called my daughter a little piggy because she had a lot of lunch. Whilst it was in all likelihood a bit of fun, am I being unreasonable to think that this is the wrong message to be sent to a 4 year old girl? I do not want her thinking that she shouldn't be eating. Women are, after all, allowed to eat food!!

Please let me know what you think!

I would be very upset about what she said to your child and this is why; years ago when I was little a friend of my dad called me a piggy for eating a corn on the cob at a restaurant. I have NEVER forgotten it and recall vividly how red my face got and how I couldn't finish my meal. It makes me feel irritated thinking about it now. I was about 8.

Unkind word are hurtful and an adult working with children should bloody well know better regardless of the lunch YOU have given her - that isn't her fault.

Yay! A packed lunch thread... Lets look forwards to the competitive bitching about how Tarquin has artisan bread rolls with fois gras in his and anything less should be considered child cruelty.

I usually avoid 'packed lunch threads for that reason, they seem very, erm, contentious on here. They elevate my blood pressure. That is why I focused on the name calling.

lljkk my younger DD is like that but my older could eat a sandwich, pasta, fruit AND cheese and she's built like a giraffee...very slim...she must burn it up fast as she's always hungry.

My question is how did DD hear it...how did you get to know about it...If she is upset then yes you need to speak to someone..I am guessing it was said as a joke but not a great thing to call a child...

I have to say if my child every day she eats pasta and flapjack on the way home no idea why it is her lunchbox...do you live a long distance from school? My DS ate an apple on the way home ..If he doesn't he has a snack when he gets home unless it is early tea..

what she does eat for lunch sounds tiny...maybe less in her lunchbox may be less daunting

Kids differ.

My 3 can not go from breakfast until tea on a tiny lunch.They often feel wobbly before lunch because they're so hungry.

They have porridge or eggs for breakfast and a big healthy lunch.One struggles to keep weight on.

Find it worrying re this blanket approach to what kids should eat. Metabolisms,blood sugar levels differ.

Yes, it's interesting that an aibu about a rude dinner lady (she was rude and needs telling so) has become a vehicle for ppl to criticise the volume/ variety of lunch for someone else's child as well as for offering details about their own child's vital stats/ activity levels/ meagre food intake.

But I confess, I feel an urge to talk about my DC's packed lunches now . I am suppssing that urge.

Amanda I know! Totally agree with you.

dd's pack-ups show a total lack of imagination on my part.

YANBU it's beyond me why some adults still think it's ok to make comments like this to children

oh but i do use an owl-shaped cutter on her sandwich.

Wow, I call my daughter a piggy all the time.
My mum used to tell me I'd turn into an elephant. I don't think there is a problem it is something people say to kids who like their food.

I don't think I would be bothered if a dinner lady said it to be honest.

hoot well some people find it offensive. It's rude....pigs are known for greed...and messy eating...why would you call a child a piggy?

Well maybe because she is greedy and makes a mess like a little pig.

This is one of the problems of mumsnet and the professionally offended trying to make something that always has and always will be completely normal something that will affect a child for life.

hoot who said the child was greedy and messy? Even if she WERE the supervisor has no right to call her a pig...she has every right to instill good manners...but none to call children pigs.

Report the supervisor. It was a stupid thing to say. Staff have no right to call children names, even in fun, least of all a 4 yr old who just wants to fit in.

What happened op?

I rue the day the phrase 'professionally offended' came into being. It's replaced 'political correctness gone mad' for gobshites who think insulting a child over their eating habits is acceptable.

Absolutely squoosh

I rue the day the phrase 'professionally offended' came into being. It's replaced 'political correctness gone mad' for gobshites who think insulting a child over their eating habits is acceptable.

And quite frankly I rue the day I ever came on mumsnet. It is not and never has been insulting to call children piggy wigs or greedy gannets.

I actually typed a much longer reply pointing out the flaws in the ridiculous mumsnet joint mentality but actually I just realised I shouldn't be here as I am an actual person who doesn't preten to fit in.

I guarantee every single one of you in real life has called their baby or small child a piggy wig, tickled their tummy and laughed.

I used to put a nice selection of things in ds lunch box, not expecting him to eat it all but to have a choice. He later asked me just to put 3 things in as I think the dinner staff were nagging him to eat it all and he was the last one out to play!

HootLoop Calling someone a "Piggywig* is NOT the same as Greedy Pig and you know it.

I agree that the OP is being over-protective. If a poor dinner lady receives a formal complaint made to the school every time she makes a jokey comment to a child, she's either going to leave, or she's going to stop being friendly with the children.