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AIBU?

To be totally hacked off with the bride and groom?

224 replies

Sarah2506 · 13/01/2014 19:49

So we are meant to be off to a wedding in Scotland next month. Quite an undertaking as we live in London and have seven month DD, but they are good friends so we booked flights, a non refundable hotel and arranged to drop DD with MIL for the whole weekend as it's a child free wedding. Fine. Actually looking forward to it as first weekend away, yay!

Then today we get an email saying that, 'unfortunately we've had to make the difficult decision to put the wedding back to the autumn. We were struggling to pay for the wedding on time and think it would just be better to delay a few months so that we can save a bit more and do it properly. We hope you understand and can make the rearranged date'.

Is this reasonable? We've paid out 500 quid in flights and hotel which we won't get back. Travel insurance doesn't cover it as it counts as disinclination to travel. The flights can't be changed- or rather they can but it costs as much as buying new ones! I'm on maternity leave, I'm not being paid, I've no desire to travel to Scotland for the weekend anyway and we won't be able to pay out for the rearranged wedding as well. I feel really sad that we might now not be able to go.

AIBU?

OP posts:

Report

rainyspells · 13/01/2014 20:06

why do you not want to go to Glasgow for the weekend?!

NachoAddict · 13/01/2014 20:08

Definitely still go on your weekend away, no point in wasting it. I know you would rather spend it with your dd so either take her with you or bite the bullet and go for it as a last bit of fun before becoming a working mum again and all that brings.

Oh and don't go to the new wedding if it ever occurs. How rude of them!!

EirikurNoromaour · 13/01/2014 20:08

Either buy your dd a ticket or just go and enjoy the break. You don't need to miss out on a child free weekend out of guilt but equally it would be nice to go away and take her too! Don't go to the rearranged wedding if it happens though.

alwaysneedaholiday · 13/01/2014 20:09

Could you change your flights for something later in the year, and use it as your holiday? i.e. add DD on, and go to somewhere else that your airline flies to?

Pixel · 13/01/2014 20:09

If it is about money I think they've missed the point about getting married (when they say 'properly' they obviously mean big and fancy).
They should have gone ahead with a cheaper venue etc and not let all their friends down like that. Seems that trying to impress people has backfired somewhat if this thread is anything to go by.

Sarah2506 · 13/01/2014 20:09

I don't want to offend any Scots! Just more that if I had my choice of weekend breaks right now I'd be heading to Rome or Venice or Barcelona etc! But you guys are right, MIL will be looking forward to it, and DD would be better with her than just hanging out with us in one room. I hadn't really even thought about still going as it's just not what we would have chosen but it would be the best way to make the best of the situation...

OP posts:

BonnieWeeJeannieMcCall · 13/01/2014 20:09

What sort of stuff do you enjoy doing on a weekend away? Us Scottish mumsnetters can help you plan a great weekend in Glasgow!

Rosencrantz · 13/01/2014 20:09

Honestly go. You're wasting money if you don't. You'll have a lovely, much needed time with your DP. Romantic dinner, seeing a new city.

If you waste this money by not going, you won't get any sympathy.

Purplehonesty · 13/01/2014 20:09

Yes advertise the tickets and hotel on Facebook/gumtree and someone may fancy a weekend away.
Then if it doesn't sell come up, it really is a great place for a weekend and we will recommend you some great things to do.
That's if you do leave the hotel

StillNoFuckingEyeDeer · 13/01/2014 20:10

Go to Scotland! You won't get many opportunities for a child-free weekend & your MIL is probably really looking forward to it. Or take DD with you. You've nothing to lose if it's all paid for already.

WaitMonkey · 13/01/2014 20:10

I'm another vote for this wedding to never go ahead. They would have already paid out a fortune and won't get it back cancelling so close to the date.

Sarah2506 · 13/01/2014 20:11

Thank you ladies! A nice veggie restaurant maybe? A Thai massage would be lush. A modern art gallery for DH!

OP posts:

AllBoxedUp · 13/01/2014 20:12

I love Glasgow but it's also very easy to get the train through to Edinburgh from there (about 45 mins) and that is a city that can rival Rome, Venice and Barcelona (I've lived in both and would happily visit either).

McFox · 13/01/2014 20:12

How fucking rude! I would think that there's definitely more to it - by this point they'll have paid potentially thousands in deposits. It doesn't seem right to me.

Maybe use it as a last wee holiday before you go back to work, and have a day out in Edinburgh - I might be biased, but I think it's a nicer city

CaterpillarCara · 13/01/2014 20:12

We went to Glasgow in the summer. Hadn't really expected to enjoy it. Had ignorant trainspotting style ideas about the whole place. Loved it. I would go again in a heartbeat!

HaroldLloyd · 13/01/2014 20:13

That's unbelievable.

Agree go to Scotland and enjoy. Tell them that you won't be able to afford to go now.

Total lack of consideration!

BonnieWeeJeannieMcCall · 13/01/2014 20:13

The Gallery of Modern Art (GOMA) is bang in the middle of Glasgow, not far from George Square.

Pumpkin567 · 13/01/2014 20:15

Go,go and conceive your next little one

They will almost certainly not be getting married.

Dogonabeanbag · 13/01/2014 20:15

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

BonnieWeeJeannieMcCall · 13/01/2014 20:16

Vegetarian restaurants www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/wordofmouth/2013/aug/12/best-vegan-vegetarian-restaurants-britain

mopsytop · 13/01/2014 20:17

Defs go to Glasgow. It is a fab city! Loads going on, great places to eat, nice parks, it has a real buzz. I actually prefer visiting Glasgow to Edinburgh (although both are nice!)

mrstigs · 13/01/2014 20:18

Never been to Glasgow but Scotland is a great place for a weekend away. The parts Ive seen have been really beautiful and the people really friendly. You should just go and make the most of the weekend away.
As for the wedding, its sucks but for whatever the reason I'd presume the bride and groom are feeling even worse right now. Try and put your (very very justified) annoyance to the side rather than risking making a possibly really crap time for them worse if they clock on to how upset they have made you.
And if none of that is true and they are genuinely so self-involved they dont care about anyone elses inconvenience - then they are twats so dont give them a second thought anyway.

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arethereanyleftatall · 13/01/2014 20:18

I wonder if the couple have realised that this will mean lots of their guests will be out of pocket? Maybe with all their own stress, they have naively assumed no one else will be affected. Maybe a nicely worded email to them first?

HairyGrotter · 13/01/2014 20:18

Go go go! Glasgow is lovely, so much to do! Edinburgh is stunning also!

I'm off to scottisland again next weekend, love the country!

AllBoxedUp · 13/01/2014 20:18

More veggie food

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