To tell DH how to spend HIS money

[AhoyMcCoy]

All money is shared. Goes into one account, bills etc paid, and then we both get an amount (approx £20 per week) to spend on whatever we like for ourselves. It's totally unaccountable- I don't question his spends and he doesn't question mine (nail polish, magazines & kindle books if you must know!)

HOWEVER. He used £10 of his weekly spends on gambling bet from some guy he follows on twitter. This guy is one of those professional gamblers who tells you how to turn your £10 into £1000 within a week.

DH has got £500 so far. Tomorrow is the final bet, where you turn your £500 into £1000. I'm BEGGING with him to stop here- £500 is money we could do with desperately, we'd love a holiday etc- it would be so nice to have a chunk of money we could be frivolous with together. I can't believe anyone could gamble £500?! But he is insistent it's his £10, and I have no say in it, and he can do what he likes with it.

If he wins the £1000, he's said it's shared and we will book a holiday, but I still don't want to risk the £500!!

So- MN Jury, AIBU?!

X post OP.

I don't like this sort of thing, so I can see where you are coming from, but I suppose it was his money, so I'm afraid I don't think you can influence it at all. As long as he isn't gambling the household finances to oblivion and is only putting down money he can afford to lose then you probably don't have a case to argue, much as it sticks in my throat to say that.

Sorry it isn't more helpful.

Its his money, great if he wins a grand but if he doesn't he's lost a tenner and the 500 was never money you actually had.

Uabu. ....But can I have the Twitter account I'd love to make a tenner into fifty pounds never mind 500.

I know people who make money from betting but you have to put a lot of effort in but they never share their tips

OK, I know I'm going to get slated for being dense and naive here, but - my immediate response is indeed scam, but I can't help thinking that a scam that gets £10 out of you is not a particularly good scam. The £500, after all, does not represent what the trickster would get - the victim of the con has parted with only a tenner, as the rest of the £500, or grand or whatever, represents winnings rather than a loss per se. Why bother with such an elaborate number of stages to get £10 out of somebody?

I would be more concerned about his desperation to gamble again than the potential loss of winnings so far.
House never loses. If you're on a winning streak, you don't stop because you are convinced it will continue. If you're on a losing streak, you don't stop because you assume your luck has to change and you can win back your losses. So it never stops. Very fucking dangerous and I would worry about even the lightest exploration of it.
But that's not what you asked. I think yanbu. £500 is a lot. He should stop.

• obviously, if enough people were taken in and the labour was not intensive, it would be a bit more of a money spinner

My dh is a betting shop manager. Trust me the only people making money from betting is the gambling industry! So... I can see where you're coming from. But - he is playing by the rules and it is his money. I hope he wins! (And doesn't get addicted either!)

YABU, but I totally get your point and I'd be the same. Please update us.

Is it REALLY £500 though - as in his possesson? Sounds like a total scam to me. And the £10 is long gone.

Ahaha Ahoy they all sound like a bunch of overgrown excited kids. Leave them to it, I know you'd like your holiday and hopefully you'll get it but like my past post said I don't think you can do anything about it.

You have to let us know what happens!

PortofinoRevisited Sounds like the guy is just a tipster and they place their own bets (prob through an online betting account like ladbrokes) Doesn't sound like a scam to me.

The £500 is presumably in his online account and can be withdrawn.... I don't know why people are so insistent it's a scam. He's simply following gambling tips from a pro, and the reason his winnings are so high are because he's placed a fair few bets that have come up winners.

Why not suggest that he bets £250 - that way he can definitely enjoy the winning, even if he loses?

Its a tenner people! If he's not of an addictive personality and on a restricted budget it doesn't have to lead to an addiction.

I've done bits of gambling for low stakes online, it can be fun betting on sports you wouldn't really take an interest in, or making the football results mean more. Put in 50 pounds and once that money went after 6 months or so stopped. I don't even remember my password for it.

It's this one: The £10 to £10000 Betting Challenge @1/1 odds - Facebook

I'm not on Facebook so I can't see it but if I were him I'd keep the money now. He's NOT betting £10, he's betting £500. Above it says they're going to £10,000 - is that the one he's on?

I was going to suggest similar to Boo, but I was going to take out £490 and use the remaining tenner for the next "cycle" of tips - if that gets to £500 as well, he's made his £1000 but spread his risk.

Also there are a few tipsters online, a friend of mine made some good money for it off a small 1 pound bet. It's just a tip it's not a guarantee of winning.

Sorry, but I think it's your DHs choice. If he loses tomorrow, I can easily see that in his mind all he's actually lost is £10, to you, he's lost the £500 he could have now, but he spent the original tenner on a bet that could get him a grand. He'll either win or lose that bet tomorrow, but if lost, it's still only cost your family £10, and that has come out of his share of the money in the first place.

Plus, if you make him withdraw the £500 and the bet wins tomorrow, you will never live it down. If he loses tomorrow, you can use this to win every argument from now on. What price would you put on always being in the right? More than £10?

i do not gamble but to my mind it is no different to going on "the cube " or "who wants to be a millionaire"
he is only losing £10 whatever happens it is no different to the person who has £8,000 on the cube and the fails to complete next task they lose £7,000 not really they actually gain £1000 they are no worse off than before the show, unless you are 100% certain of an answer or skill you are gambling

OP's husband turned £10 into £500 he could walk away now with £500 or he does the next bet/ question etc which he may or may not win if he wins he is £990 better off if he loses he is -£10

would you feel the same if he wasted the £10 on lottery tickets each week

"We could do with the money desperately"
.... "For a holiday.... To be frivolous with"
That doesn't sound desperate to me

And all of this 'only £10' is exactly the kind of rationalisation that keeps the betting industry very very rich.
Tax on stupidity.

Teacup yes you are right with the comparison to cube/millionaire. I would always stick with my money and be safe, whereas DH is a risk taker and would be like "I came with nothing, I'll leave with nothing!". And I couldn't care less if he had been spending £10 on lottery tickets each week, he can wipe his ass with his £10 if he wants each week it's just to me we are now talking about £500!

And yes, again I am sorry for saying I was for the money. We're not at the moment, luckily, which is why we can afford to have our £20 weekly spends each. We live a very nice life, I'd just like to have extra cash for a treat, and I will go on and on and on about it forever if this bet doesn't win- I'll update you all tomorrow!

If he was spending a tenner on lottery tickets a week, within a year you'd be talking about £500 too.

He isn't spending £500 of family money, he's spending £10 of his money.

If you saved £10 a week and built up £500, would you think it was still yours to decide how to spend or is the nature of it being turned from a small sum into a large one make it now family money that he'd have a say on how it was spent?

Just imagine how many people are trying to find this guy's tips now