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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

WIBU? 3 yo and bottle or 9yo with teddies

87 replies

CadleCrap · 31/12/2013 12:39

My DD is about to turn 3.

She drinks from a cup normally but at bed time she has a bath, a bottle (ie baby bottle with teat) of cow's milk, brushes teeth, story, then bed.

DD has no other comforter/cuddly toy she is attached to.

My DSis says DD is too old for a bottle, but her 9 yo twin boys cannot go to bed with out their favorite teddies.

Why is DD too old for a bottle? Who says? It is one a day and teeth are brushed afterward.

DSis says about the teddies, they like their comfort.

What is the difference between a bottle as comfort or a teddy and wibu?

OP posts:
Original poster
CadleCrap · 31/12/2013 13:18

I love the no one else's business posts, I know DD has good dental hygiene so I am not worried about the bottle damaging her teeth.

(PONDERS if it was a cup of milk would you be saying the same thing?)

OP posts:
williteverstop · 31/12/2013 13:19

I had a bottle at night until I was quite old, pretty much up until I went to school, I think. My teeth are fine! I was never interested in teddies. I think the comfort was a lot to do with having a full tummy - low blood sugar always made me anxious and agitated (still does!) If you do want to wean her off it, I would say make sure she has a little something to eat instead to settle her tummy and make her feel sleepy and relaxed.

Original poster
CadleCrap · 31/12/2013 13:21

Curlew I think that is my point-WHO says DD is too old for a bottle that lasts less than 5 mins

OP posts:
Original poster
CadleCrap · 31/12/2013 13:26

willit DD barely eats at tea time and is not hungry (except for biscuits which she would eat all the time) so milk is my way of making sure she sleeps through.

Is the delivery of a cup or bottle important?

OP posts:
campion · 31/12/2013 13:37

Give her the bottle and ignore the nay sayers. Ds2 had a bottle at bedtime till he went to school. He was ( is) a fussy eater and it was the only way he'd consume a decent amount of milk.

He has perfect second teeth ( as were his first teeth).
Honestly, don't go on a guilt trip about it - she's happy and her teeth are not going to fall out. Tell your DSis to bring her own DC up perfectly before she advises you!

GlitzAndGiggles · 31/12/2013 13:43

OP if you're worried about the bottle aspect would your dd take a sippy cup?

ILoveAFullFridge · 31/12/2013 13:45

None of my dc brushed their teeth after their bedtime milk. We have used breast, bottle, sippy cup, glass, breast milk, formula and cows milk. None of them have any cavities. The one who was breastfed for longest has an underbite, the one who had mostly bedtime cups has an overbite, and the one who had mostly bedtime bottles has neither.

What they all had, and still have, were easy bedtimes.

IMO it works for you, and if it ain't broke - don't fix it.

Original poster
CadleCrap · 31/12/2013 13:47

Grin @ campion Tell your DSis to bring her own DC up perfectly before she advises you!

DSis spent the entire day bitching about the Dtiwns behavoiur!!

OP posts:
BathTimeBill · 31/12/2013 13:49

I think 3 is fine to still have a bottle. Its not going to do her any harm. My dd still had a bottle at this age and then decided to give it up when she was ready.
As for wanting to keep kids babies for longer.....why not?

Coconutty · 31/12/2013 13:50

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ilovesmurfs · 31/12/2013 13:51

my dd is three and has a bottle of milk before bed.

ds4 had a bottle before bed until three yrs fve mths.

ds2 and ds3 both bfed before bed until almost four yrs old.

its fine, its comfort and routine.

walking round all day with a bottle not good.

one bottle drunk in five mins and teeth cleaned a bit after is fine.

Bodypopper · 31/12/2013 13:56

It's fine for your kid to have a bottle and it's fine for your dsis kids to have teddies.

What is not fine is comparing and bitching about each other's kids.

Also research and current child rearing practise is great but do remember that it changes as much as fashion and hair styles.

fifi669 · 31/12/2013 14:02

DS3 still has a bottle. Some nights he says they're for babies and doesn't want one, others he's horrified I haven't brought one up. It's been part of his routine forever and a day so I'm letting him lead. I have reduced the amount of milk in the bottle to just a few ounces though to nudge him on a bit.

somethingchristmassy · 31/12/2013 14:04

www.bbc.co.uk/news/health-13294632

www.bbc.co.uk/news/health-13294632

The problem is the mechanism of sucking affecting the development of the jaw and teeth, it is a different sucking action than breastfeeding. Five minutes a day might not seem like a lot, but over three years it is a lot of "training" the muscles of the jaw to behave in a certain way. Five minutes a day of muscle training exercises in physiotherapy, for example, can make a massive difference.

somethingchristmassy · 31/12/2013 14:07

A cup of milk is different, even though teeth should still be cleaned afterwards, because the milk doesn't stay in the mouth and wash over the teeth in the same way.

curlew · 31/12/2013 14:09

Somethingcrissmassy, your link is to the problems with toddlers being put to bed with bottles of high calorie drinks being at risk of obesity- no mention of teeth at all.

ilovesmurfs · 31/12/2013 14:56

Oh my 9 and 11 yr olds both have cuddly toys in bed btw, so cuddlies fine as well. Hell I am 34 and still have a cuddly from when I was a baby, not in bed my bed is filled by the toddler and her cuddly toys

SaucyJack · 31/12/2013 15:14

I would find it very strange to still be giving bottles at three, but each to their own.

NothinToSeeHere · 31/12/2013 15:39

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

wigglesrock · 31/12/2013 15:39

My almost 3 year old still has a bottle of milk the odd time. Usually when she's very upset or ill - not so much at night. My older 2 had completely stopped bottles by 15 months & 18 months. This wee one just likes the comfort it brings - she never bother with a dummy, a comfy blanket but her bobo is her thing.

She's already been to the dentist & I've mentioned it to him & he has no issue with it. She doesn't have it at night, she takes it quickly & it comforts her.

At the minute we are both loaded with the cold - I'm necking cocodamol & she's curled up watching a DVD having a bottle - I've no concerns at all.

Gileswithachainsaw · 31/12/2013 15:45

I don't think you can really compare giving a child a breast feed at three to giving a bottle at three. One fulfills a nutritional benefit to the child with a milk that's tailored to that child's stage and offers considerable emotional benefit to child and mother.

The others a plastic bottle, with a milk designed for baby cows and merely fulfils a habit.

I formula fed so not averse to bottles in the slightest but by three there's nothing in cues milk that you can't get else where in the diet so isn't "needed" in the same way.

You cannot compare them. And this is from a bottle feeder

Gileswithachainsaw · 31/12/2013 15:46

Cows milk

NothinToSeeHere · 31/12/2013 15:51

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

NothinToSeeHere · 31/12/2013 15:53

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Only1scoop · 31/12/2013 15:55

You and dsis just have different ideas. I don't personally see much of a comparison between a teddy at night and a bottle. To me It would seem odd to give my dd who is 3 a bottle as she has not had one for a couple of years.... however, as others have said it apparently does no harm so its whatever works for her.