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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to buy baby things before I've even conceived

53 replies

oskie84uk · 31/12/2013 12:09

Dp has finally earned the 'd' in dp and agreed to start ttc in June. Even though I have problems with my womanly bits, and it may be difficult to concieve, I have the urge to buy baby bits and pieces in preparation, especially while they're so cheap in the sales. Might I jinx things?

OP posts:
DIYapprentice · 31/12/2013 12:11

Don't, just don't. You will have a full 8 months of buying and prepping time once you do get pregnant. There is seriously no need to start buying things now.

Think of yourself, and treat yourself right now.

BrandiBroke · 31/12/2013 12:12

I don't think you'll jinx things, I just think you might end up with loads of stuff you won't need for ages. Plus if you do have problems, or have a miscarriage or anything, the baby stuff might be a painful reminder. I've been ttc for nearly 3 years now. I'm glad I don't have a house full of stuff to constantly remind me what I'm missing out on.

Timpani · 31/12/2013 12:14

Don't. I know it's tempting, it was for me. But it took years and fertility treatment. Once I finally could buy stuff it was well worth the wait! And by then I'd had advice and read a lt about what would actually be useful and what wasn't necessary.

DameDeepRedBetty · 31/12/2013 12:14

I wouldn't, mainly as it is very depressing seeing the adorable outfit you chose for your as yet not conceived son or daughter being worn by other children!

MatryoshkaDoll · 31/12/2013 12:14

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
oskie84uk · 31/12/2013 12:15

Sorry Brandi for your troubles ttc. Hope luck comes your way soon xxx

OP posts:
mouldyironingboard · 31/12/2013 12:15

YABU

If you start ttc in June and if you are successful during the summer, you can buy stuff in next year's sales.

SugarHut · 31/12/2013 12:15

DON'T DO IT.

If you must....buy the baby/parenting magazines. But don't load yourself with baby bits and pieces, which will then as sods law, sit around your house staring you in the face as you ttc.

Squigglypig · 31/12/2013 12:18

I don't think you'll jinx things, but I do remember when I was pregnant with DD1 an older woman coming up to me, putting her hand on my stomach and then proceeding to tell me how awful her life was and how she'd never managed to have children and it was worse because she'd decorated the nursery and bought all of the things for these babies that never arrived.

So don't waste your money now, you don't really need anything for the first few months anyway - just babygrows and you have plenty of time to get those once you get pregnant.

Good luck though!

PicaK · 31/12/2013 12:21

It won't jinx anything. I'd buy 1 or 2 lovely, lovely things and use them as something positive to focus on. Don't buy loads of practical stuff just yet.

If it doesn't work (and obviously i'm hoping it does) then what you'll have will be small enough to keep forever.

If it does work then get yourself to an nct nearly new sale to get the practical stuff (volunteer so you can shop really early and get the best stuff.)

HyvaPaiva · 31/12/2013 12:22

OP, it's not a good idea to buy things 'in preparation' when you aren't pregnant. Not because it 'jinxes' anything but because TTC isn't something any of us can guarantee or control. Wait until it's real and not only a dream. It'll be so exciting and fulfilling to buy and plan when it's actually happening. Before an actual pregnancy, it isn't a good idea at all.

Pobblewhohasnotoes · 31/12/2013 12:23

Don't do it!

It may take you ages to conceive. There will always be sales.

MrsDeanAmbrose · 31/12/2013 12:24

There are sales on baby stuff all the time. If you have spare cash, save it.

Nojustalurker · 31/12/2013 12:24

Why don't you open a separate savings account and transfer money into is every month to buy things for baby when you have conceived. It is very easy to do if ou have online banking.

clara26 · 31/12/2013 12:24

Don't do it. I'm ttc at th moment and I won't buy anything until I'm in my third trimester. If you struggle to conceive (I really hope you get preggers ASAP) they will be a depressing reminder IMO.

Good luck xx

clara26 · 31/12/2013 12:26

I agree with the others, open a savings account, that can be the something positive to focus on xx

areyoubeingserviced · 31/12/2013 12:29

Don't do it
My cousin spent a fortune on baby clothes, pram and a cot. Unfortunately she was never able to conceive.

Meerka · 31/12/2013 12:30

are you the poster who posted about being with someone who resolutely refused to start trying? and finally you agreed on saving money for 6 months and then trying?

If not, sorry! but no, dont buy stuff yet =)

If you are ... then absolutely do not buy stuff yet. You might be floating on a pink cloud 9 atm, but looking from the outside, you need to keep your feet on the ground. You need to be sure he really will keep his word. Sorry, but given the background (if you are that poster) there's some chance he won't, given how adamant he was against children before that.

tombakerscarf · 31/12/2013 12:30

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

tombakerscarf · 31/12/2013 12:32

This reply has been deleted

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DIYapprentice · 31/12/2013 12:33

Oh, I quite liked the idea of Paddington willies.... Grin

DameDeepRedBetty · 31/12/2013 12:35

And when you are safely 12 weeks plus, your friends and family will be overjoyed to have something to spend THEIR money on - so you can afford more chocolates and other very important things for yourself!

You will need far far less than the baby magazines etc might lead you to believe. Don't forget, their income is mostly from advertising rather than cover price, so it's in their interests to promote Stuff, gadgets, etc etc.

HyvaPaiva · 31/12/2013 12:41

Hang on. Just re-read. You aren't actually even starting TTC until six months from now? Absolutely don't buy anything. I'm not sure what issues you had with your partner to make him 'finally earn the 'dear'' but this seems very pre-emptive.

He11y · 31/12/2013 12:44

I would resist buying much at all until the baby is actually here.

You tend to stuck to neutral things before they are born as you don't know what they will look like, their personality or their sex.

When they arrive, you will probably want to get stuff for them and there is little point if you have loads of things already.

Plus your opinions may well change once they arrive and you might not like the things you have and you will be amazed how much space one tiny little person can fill so it makes sense to buy only what is practical and necessary.

Lastly, money starts to become an issue for most people with a newborn and it may be a while before you can afford to do the things you like doing and buying baby bits becomes more about finances than choice.

Save some money now so you have the ability to buy things as you need them and you can afford to buy what you like as well as what you can afford.

You won't follow this advice as the impulse to buy stuff is too big, but you'll wish you had at some point in the future!

Hang fire, you won't regret it!

tombakerscarf · 31/12/2013 12:57

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

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