This has probably been discussed loads of times before on here but i just had to post as the amount of comments i get about how lucky i am that dh does night times, washes up bottles, only 'babysit's' our son when its convenient to him etc astonishes me.
When baby was born and i was trying to establish a milk supply (expressing as baby wouldn't bf), i did all the night feeds as i had to get up anyway to express, and dh did late feed and a morning feed so i got a bit more sleep on either end of the night. As baby got older and i was no longer expressing coz milk dried up, and feeds through the night got less, we evolved our arrangement to one of us did first shift, other does second, and then i did nights mid week while dh was working and he did weekends. Now its settled down we do alternate nights so we both get every other night off.
So many people are shocked that dh does 'so much' and some even say that their partner does none of the night stuff, or they have to negotiate some help for a night off etc and in really lucky. IMO although he has to go to work, i have to look after baby and the home (on mat leave) so we both deserve some rest and dh has never indicated that he feels he shouldn't do as much as me.
I know that our arrangement wouldn't work for all families and that some men's jobs mean that they cant commit to such a routine, or absolutely cannot be tired at work because of the nature of their job. But where they work a mon-Fri office hours type job, why shouldn't they do a share?
I'm not boasting or saying that we are perfect, hubby is not so good at household stuff as our standards are so different, but why is this not the norm?
Dh foes not feel that he is worthy of praise for mucking in and neither do i.
Thoughts please!