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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To NOT want my DD to get a tattoo?

246 replies

neiljames77 · 27/12/2013 16:24

She's 18 tomorrow and I have so far told her I don't want her to have one.
After tomorrow though, I have no say at all. Some of her friends have them and they look hideous and have even ruined their career prospects by having them.

OP posts:
Marshy · 28/12/2013 11:33

I have to concur with usual as a post which includes the phrase big lardy version of the yellow pages surely merits the description of twatish? As does one which refers to women as post menopausals, surely?

Yes mrsjay, I had to tiptoe through that minefield Grin

SirChenjin · 28/12/2013 11:37

insancerre - do you think it was perhaps the text, rather than the tattoo, that held him back in the (Royal) Armed Forces?

mrsjay · 28/12/2013 11:38

insancerre - do you think it was perhaps the text, rather than the tattoo, that held him back in the (Royal) Armed Forces?

was what i was thinking

EmmaBemma · 28/12/2013 11:42

I don't see why tattoos need hold anyone back in their careers. I wear long sleeves to work and no-one even knows I'm tattooed. My mum is a nurse and while she herself isn't tattooed, she knows at least one doctor with a full Japanese sleeve and another nurse with a forearm design, so even in jobs where you have to have them on show it needn't be a problem.

harticus · 28/12/2013 11:46

As does one which refers to women as post menopausals, surely?

Well as a post-menopausal woman myself I shall call them whatever I please.
They are my sisters at the altar of Tena. Grin

And the fact is that it is true.

The most conspicuous patrons of the copious tattoo parlours that have suddenly sprung up round here are all women in their 50s and 60s.

Whether you approve of that fact or not does not make it in any way less true.
In the same way that the most conspicuous users of nail parlours are younger women or betting shops older men.

insancerre · 28/12/2013 11:49

undoubtedly, of course it was the text, rather than the actual tattoo, he has others
but, it serves as a warning, what seems like a good idea at the time (happy in the haze of a drunken hour?), can have consequences far beyond what you might imagine

maybe he should have had it done in Chinese?

I think with tattoos, you either need to have them so you can cover them up when you need to, or go the other way and have loads like this chap
www.flickr.com/photos/28356268@N02/3120384527

Caitlin17 · 28/12/2013 11:50

I'd be very surprised at tattoos being the only reason for not being promoted in the armed services.

Original poster
neiljames77 · 28/12/2013 11:51

I think one or two posters are missing the point. I couldn't be prouder than I am that my daughter wants to be a nurse. If she can't be a nurse, she wants to work with the elderly as a care assistant. She's a caring person by nature. I pointed out that one of her friends couldn't get the job she wanted due to a visible tattoo.

The car insurance quote was 6 months ago. 1 litre Vauxhall Corsa, fully comp, 18 year old, just passed test, parked on drive overnight. £5135 per year. I checked what it would be to put her on my insurance as a named driver. Mine would go from £300 per year to just less than £7000.

OP posts:
DoYouLikeMyBaubles · 28/12/2013 11:54

She won't be 18 when she's qualified though

DoYouLikeMyBaubles · 28/12/2013 11:55

I dont think I've missed the point though, you're saying she's not going to afford tattoos as a nurse, you're basically saying she won't be able to afford any luxuries. That could be seen as you not being supportive, and wanting to put her off.

SirChenjin · 28/12/2013 11:56

I was always under the impression that having a tattoo was almost a requirement of the armed forces! I know what you mean though - having a tattoo which can be covered seems the most sensible approach - you just don't know what will happen in the future.

Original poster
neiljames77 · 28/12/2013 11:59

No, she wouldn't. But I promise you, my calculations are not wrong at all.
She starts work as a care assistant next month working weekends.

OP posts:
mrsjay · 28/12/2013 12:01

my dds first car insurance wasn't that much

Original poster
neiljames77 · 28/12/2013 12:05

The cost isn't the main issue though. It was just one of the angles I was using to make her think twice. I can't see many employers stating the reason you didn't get a particular job was because of a visible tattoo. Privately, that could be the reason though and it would be a shame if it was between her and another candidate and that tipped the scales against her.

OP posts:
Original poster
neiljames77 · 28/12/2013 12:07

If anybody is looking for a stick to beat me with, please don't suggest that I'm not supportive of my children or not proud of them.

OP posts:
EmmaBemma · 28/12/2013 12:09

"Privately, that could be the reason though and it would be a shame if it was between her and another candidate and that tipped the scales against her."

Unless she's planning to get a tattoo on her face, neck, or hands, anything else can easily be covered at an interview.

Original poster
neiljames77 · 28/12/2013 12:12

Which is why, Emma, I'm trying to talk her out of one of those patterns on the side of her hand.

OP posts:
Fairenuff · 28/12/2013 12:14

You probably won't be able to dissuade her but you can try to get involved in discussions about it. As others have said, best to have the first one in a very discreet place, on the hip perhaps?

AnyFuckerForAMincePie · 28/12/2013 12:14

What does her mum say on the subject ? Both DH and I discourage tattoos in our children. We have an 18yo dd. She has held off so far. We go for the scare tactic approach Smile

Marshy · 28/12/2013 12:15

Your world seems very neat harticus Mine is less so, which is perhaps why I dislike reductionist terms such as 'post menopausals'

The views I expressed re tattoos related to my teenage daughter. Happily, 50 and 60 year old women are more free to do whatever the hell they like, as I quite frequently do having achieved the luxury of age and independence Grin

LadyJx · 28/12/2013 12:15

It's none of your business. I have 4 so far 2 of which are in visible places and I have a very respectable job.

She's an adult now, let her be one and make her own choices.

noddyholder · 28/12/2013 12:15

They do not ruin career prospects or dp and I would be penniless. As it stands we aren't. My renal consultant has them as does our solicitor. Its none of your business.

Marshy · 28/12/2013 12:19

Op you sound like a concerned dad and I think you have had some good advice on here. I hope you find a happy conclusion

EmmaBemma · 28/12/2013 12:22

"Which is why, Emma, I'm trying to talk her out of one of those patterns on the side of her hand."

Oh, sorry! I should've read the thread properly. Well, I agree with you there, speaking as a relatively heavily tattooed person. I think anything below the wrist/above the neck is unwise, especially for a first tattoo. And side-of-hand tattoos can blur very quickly, as skin cells divide quickly there.

Original poster
neiljames77 · 28/12/2013 12:22

Best not to say what her mum's thoughts on the idea are.

OP posts:
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