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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To feel I am constantly fighting a battle against "stuff"

224 replies

Notcontent · 26/12/2013 23:39

I should preface this by saying that i don't have a big house. Just a standard 3 bedroom.

But I feel like I am constantly putting things away, rearranging stuff to find new inventive ways to fit things in and in general trying to keep clutter to a minimum. Of course my dd is a huge contributor to the problem. I sometimes feel like things breed and multiply in her room!! Grin

I did a quick post Christmas Day tidy up today and already have a bag of stuff to take to the charity shop (to make room for new things).

If you don't have a huge house with masses of storage, how do you cope?

OP posts:
ARealPickle · 27/12/2013 19:08

We're about to go through toys. It's not "tat" as someone up thread expressed. They're good toys., but we don't have space. So brio, lego, etc is going to have to go.

The children share a small room so all toys ate in the sitting room, which is small. Its so hard to choose.

Similarly if you have whole trofasts full of lego but you have space for it, that's fine. If there isn't space and it's cluttered you need to cull! We have all the toys they own in a couple of trofasrs so Lego space is limited!

elQuintoConyo · 27/12/2013 19:33

We have an expedit 4x4 and a curious, climbing very 'handsy' 2yo, so only the top shelf and top of it us being used. Got a couple of pretty expedit boxes to hold essentials and a small hadful if (very pretty-looking and well-read/will read again) books and photographs.

However, the lower 3 shelves hold baby-related stuff (emergency nappies, wipes, changing mat), some stuffed toys etc, nothing he ca break. I actually brought down to empty napoy boxes for Christmas: one to hold his alreadyvastcollection if cars/vehicles, the other for tge Ikea train set we bought him. Now, at the end of the day/when he goes for a nap, veything is scooped up into these fugly boxes and put on the expedut where he can get at them and tip them out later, which is fine.

I realise buying pretty wicker boxes would help the decor of the house - DS would easily break them. Not in a position to 'just buy a trofast' at the moment, plus we live abroad and the cost of the petrol and bloody toll roads just to get there are a joke.

I sometimes just pull out a box and go through it, bin stuff, recycle stuff, put stuff in its proper place etc, or a drawer or a shelf. I have days where I can't part with anything and days when I'm ruthless - I like those days Grin

elQuintoConyo · 27/12/2013 19:35

Jeez Louise, I hope you can struggle through my dull badly typed post!

ISpyNotAnotherMincePie · 27/12/2013 19:55

I'm a hoarder in recovery who seems to be waging a constant war against stuff. I used to be terrible for keeping things for sentimental reasons especially toys or clothes that had been gifts for the DC. I have now had a complete shift in mindset and am desperately trying to declutter. The problem now is finding time. It's almost impossible when the DC are around, especially DC2 (12 months) who's favourite pass time is randomly transporting things from one room to the next. DS1 (4) is increasingly starting to play with lego and playmobil resulting in yet more bits.

I have had a good go at it today and sorted a pile if stuff to donate to a local refuge. I've also been ruthless and binned anything broken "awaiting repair", crap from comics/party bags etc

I dream of properly decluttering the spare room, fitting it out with trofast/expedit/billy and making it into a proper playroom. When I'm feeling optimistic I tell myself that this will be the year it happens. When I inevitably don't find time I'll beat myself up about how the DC have so much stuff due to the generosity of others yet nowhere near a good enough system for finding things easily and therefore getting the most out og their toys Sad

sicily1921 · 27/12/2013 19:58

Notcontent a visit to my house will be guaranteed to make you feel better and that you have minimal clutter (see my Dinosaur thread on AIBU too)!

I can still recall with a shiver Christmas approx. 2003/4 when Great Grandma, God rest her soul, sent the two DCs about 6 GIANT Christmas bags of STUFF. And, like all the best GGs was a dab hand at buying stuff that broke all health and safety regulations (like the doll whose head came off as soon as it was touched to revealed a dangerous looking sharp spike). That year I recall weeping on the bedroom floor and incoherently muttering something like 'I give up, I succumb to shed loads of crap....'

Littlegreyauditor · 27/12/2013 20:30

I had a mini nervous breakdown when I surveyed the living room on Boxing Day. There was just so much stuff, piled up, and I'm supposed to find room for it amidst all the other stuff that I had just about managed to get organised after DS's birthday.

If I had the money I would turn our spare room (which will be DS's room when he quits cosleeping) into a kind of library of shelving and plastic boxes, but then I would need to find somewhere else to put DH's guitars (they breed too, it's not just junk which breeds).

I am really very grateful for all the (expensive, high quality) toys DS has been given this Christmas but the thing is we live in a terrace with an open plan ground floor and I don't want to see it all the damn time Sad

Aaaaaaaagh! I'm going to end up with an Expedit in every room.

Utterly · 27/12/2013 20:46

Even the charity shops groan when they see me coming!

ARealPickle · 27/12/2013 20:52

I've given up with the not seeing it problem. Our sitting room has billy across one side (with our books we want downstairs on top and toys/jigsaw/games on the bottom. Other side of the room has trofast across it. Not pretty but tidy. And what can you do?! The toys get played with down here, there isn't space upstairs so we've just decided its "for a season" and I bet we miss them when they're not there!

I'm procrastinating. I need to get package up some plastic cars/animals...

Badvocatyuletide · 27/12/2013 20:59

Charity shop
E bay
Worst case scenario....skip
:)
Seriously, I have lots of ikea storage systems like trofast aNd expedit and it does help.
I also have a toy cull before each b day and Xmas and so it doesn't get too bad.

Pixel · 27/12/2013 21:04

I have to keep googling all these references to Ikea stuff to see what you are all talking about Grin.
I only went there once, I thought I would never get out alive, and all I bought were some of those little plastic clips you put on opened bags of veg so you can put them back in the freezer. The thought of buying furniture and then discovering it won't fit in the car is far too terrifying ha ha (plus it was miles away and on a terrifying industrial estate that I'll never face again as long as I live).

Anywhere else apart form Ikea that does good cheap storage and preferably delivers ?

ARealPickle · 27/12/2013 21:10

There's people near us that do "Ikea runs" advertised locally. Ie you pay them and they come back with the goods.... very very tempting for next time.

Or what we have done is pretty much decide what it is we want in advance (usually a bit of Billy or Trofast, so pretty generic/easy etc) - just get the number in the packing/picking/loading/shed/whatever its called bit on the computer there and just make a quick entrance and exit without going in the store!

The stuff is just so good for the price, and so practical with children... and so generic you can always replace bits/add bits.

Pixel · 27/12/2013 21:34

Mmm, might have to see if there is anyone near us who does that or bribe my stepdad who has an estate car.

Lovebargains · 27/12/2013 23:52

This thread is really helping me, don't know about anyone else.

I have filled 5 carrier bags full of stuff for the charity shop. My friend said even if you remove one item a day, in a month you will have removed about 30 items. This is useful for when it gets overwhelming.

ARealPickle · 28/12/2013 00:07

2 boxes removed here.

I have to keep resisting the urge to 'save to ebay.' And actually part with stuff.

There really isn't enough room for children's bit s but I don't want to end up shelving every wall in the house!

ItsIgginningToLookALotLikeXmas · 28/12/2013 00:13

I've just been measuring up a corner of the living room to see if I could fit in yet more trofast! (I can't Sad )

TheFirstToel · 28/12/2013 00:21

It drives me insane. It's extra frustrating because I'm actually quite good at getting organised and decluttering, but we have 2 DC (young so I can't really expect them to pull their weight) and my DP is a messy sod who is terrible at throwing anything away or putting anything away in a sensible place. If he's finished with it, he shoves it onto the nearest table/shelf/any flat surface - especially fecking paperwork. letters from bank etc that I'm not sure if I can throw away. Empty boxes/envelopes that stuff has arrived in. Oh and cables, bloody CABLES and random bits of tech that may or may not be no longer needed. I spend my life decluttering his and the DC's ever-burgeoning clutter (pictures... party bag stuff...school stuff...magazine tat...), asking what has to be kept and finding places to put it/making decisions about what to bin/oxfam. Our house is a smallish 3-bed with no loft, no garage, no spare room, just 1 decent storage cupboard so I have to be ruthless.

I have also been "saving to ebay" but today I faced up to the fact that I will never have the time (or at least not for about 15 years), so gave a big bag to a charity shop. It felt good to do that not just to get shot of it but as an act of charity - to give it away because a lot of people must ebay instead now (not judging them for that at all, but it helped me make my decision).

However my endless efforts do mean that we don't have that much stored tat. The incoming tide of clutter is constantly in my face, but I do deal with it. Friends I know who do have a garage/cellar/spare room/loft have terrifying amounts of STUFF stored in boxes, which puts the amount we have in the shade.

Chelvis · 28/12/2013 11:19

What really helped me was having the loft boarded - yes, it helped with extra space, but most of all, it helped me put a cost on storage space in my home. Looking at the loft floor thinking 'this space costs X per square foot' made me very precious about what we put on it, in the loft and in the whole house.

With the Christmas presents, we left everything from the extended family in the hall until the kids were in bed and then unpacked + sorted it ourselves into 'keep', 'bin' and 'charity' piles. It stopped the emotional responses to toys that they really won't play with for more than five mins.

sicily1921 · 28/12/2013 17:29

Some days I catch myself in a foul mood for no apparent reason then I realise it's because of the mess and crap everywhere. It's just bloody never-ending

Can I second that MInty?

Utterly · 28/12/2013 18:10

Have battled stuff all afternoon. Have loads of boxes of toys, piles of book - but where is the best place to taken them? The charity shop are always ungrateful when we turn up with things in bulk. I'm wondering about hospitals or homes that lost presents in floods this year?

nickeldonkeyonadustyroad · 28/12/2013 21:50

[[http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/good_housekeeping/1950192-The-Hoarders-Anonymous-Thread-Sorting-It-Out we

nickeldonkeyonadustyroad · 28/12/2013 21:50

[[http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/good_housekeeping/1950192-The-Hoarders-Anonymous-Thread-Sorting-It-Out

nickeldonkeyonadustyroad · 28/12/2013 21:50

[[http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/good_housekeeping/1950192-The-Hoarders-Anonymous-Thread-Sorting-It-Out we'

nickeldonkeyonadustyroad · 28/12/2013 21:52

we've resurrected the Hoarders' Support thread
bloody toddler climbing all over me!

ARealPickle · 28/12/2013 21:58

Nickel - you sold the shop?!!? I used to follow your updates. How are you? What happened to the shop? What are you doing now? Have you moved...

AdmiralData · 28/12/2013 22:40

Oh hello, this is MY kinda thread.

If it hasn't been used in a week - chuck it. Toys, books, clothes, ornaments, furniture, electrical equipment etc DONATE IT. Be utterly ruthless and try not to be sentimental.

I luffs nothing better than a good sort out. Did one today. Marvellous. The charity shops will appreciate it>:)