to wonder where job centre expect kids to go?

[flummoxedbanana]

My sisters husband left last year when their son was a newborn. Shes in the final year of her degree and her son was one a few weeks ago. Shes currently on income support and has been accepted on a graduate teacher programme commencing in September. She received a letter from the job centre informing her she must attend a lone parent information session in January which is a group activity and will last at least two hours. The letter states she can receive help with childcare costs but obviously most nurseries won't take children for a few hours as a one off because they recognise, quite rightly, that they're likely to be upset and unsettled. Her son has never been away from her so even if she could find a nursery to take him she'd have to sit listening to pointless information while he's distraught. I live several hours away otherwise I'd help out. AIBU to wonder where the job centre expect kids to go?

I would take the baby along with me if I was her. Surely, if you are going along to a job centre you wouldn't have funds to put your baby in a nursery which costs money esp. if you are out of work so wouldn't routinely need daytime childcare?! I think she should take him and see what they say.

It specifically says to call if baby is under 12 months but her son isn't and it specifies children are not allowed under any circumstances.

I think its outrageous then. Very few people put their baby in a paying nursery when they are out of work and 15 hours free nursery doesn't kick in till they are 3!

Will her benefits be stopped if she does not attend? If she is not on JSA I fail to see what it has to do with the job centre.

She's thinking she'll have to feign illness but is worried because it says non-attendance will relate in her benefits being stopped.

I would hope if she rang they would either allow her son to come or postpone it until childcare can be organised i.e. September when she won't need the course. They must have some sort of protocol if they ask those with under 12 months to call. Sadly I fear they won't be that accommodating. I would get her to ring and try though.

When the letter says "help with childcare costs" are they going to cover the full amount? Can she find a childminder that might have space for that day?

X-post. Yes it says they'll be stopped which obviously she can't afford to happen. It's just fru

Frustrating when

Sorry

Sure start centres sometimes provide childcare could she try that? or if not they have childminder group sessions, she could ask them to ask the childminders for a one off space.

Who looks after her son when she's at uni?

If it was me I would see if my health visitor had any ideas.

She's spoken to a few crafty but they won't as it's not worth the £9 or so for three hours of an upset toddler disrupting their other mindees. She's wary of phoning the job centre to ask as then they might not believe her if she says she's poorly on the day

It's an OU course sooper

Doesn't she have any friends or family who could help as it's just for a couple of hours?

Or Natasha's idea is a good one, see what they suggest?

I don't think phoning in sick will help, they'll just give her a place on the next session, so she'll still have the same issue

Tell her to turn up with him on the day and say her childcare fell through, better than having her benefits stopped.

she will absolutely have her benefits stopped if she doesnt attend - there has been an enormous increase in sanctions for this kind of thing.

It's not a great situation - BUT... Im a bit unsympathetic if she isn't prepared to call the job centre and explain. She cant wimp out of that just so she can call in sick, she has to do her best to attend.

If they are going to pay for childcare she can go on sitters.co.uk? or look for a local babysitter - always worth finding someone local anyway for emergencies who you trust.

Its good to make sure you know somebody in your area who can take your child ocassionally - a neighbour/ a friend?

It doesn't really matter where the job centre expects her child to go. How does she expect to be able to support her child if she has no income? Surely that's the more important question here.

It sounds like she can't afford the luxury of education of it's preventing her from working. She should get a job.

What makes her so sure that her child will be distraught?

This seems like a catch 22 situation. She's required to have childcare but it's impossible to find for a one off (unless you already use childcare) otherwise her benefit will be stopped?? Is this a legal requirement? I'd contact them to verify and ask them who to use for childcare.

She has a secure job with prospects starting in September, which depends on successful completion of her degree.

But obviously she should jack that in in order to jump through job centre hoops.

I don't have anywhere for ds to go when I have job centre appointments (we live in the countryside with crap transport so it wouldn't just be an hour or two, no family etc). I took him with me and they had to lump it. I did phone the first time to warn them.

If she phones in sick, she will just have to do it again at a later date. I think she should tell them she has not been able to find anywhere that will take a 13 mo for one session, so what do they suggest?

I think she should play an open hand.

All this phoning in sick/not phoning them to talk will just allow them to characterize her as flaky & disinterested.

I would express enthusiasm for the course - preferably in writing - then (as advised up thread) ask for childcare advise & how much funding is available for childcare. State that you have approached CM X Y & Z & nursery a&b and they cannot take care of the DC as a one-off.

A couple of hours at an information evening seems like a pretty easy hoop to jump through in return for the living expenses of two people being paid in full to me.