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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to be fed up of people looking at my 9 week old DD and asking...

26 replies

42andcounting · 18/12/2013 20:51

"How old is your little boy?". I know it's hard to tell at this age, especially as she has very chubby little cheeks - and thats why she wears girly clothes, masses of pink, and has a pink blanket. Today she was wearing a t-shirt with a pink fairy on it, and a pink cardi with a pink ribbon, and still two separate people asked me. It's not as if there were no visual clues!!!

OP posts:

randomquicknamechange · 18/12/2013 20:53

Maybe they are mumsnetters who don't think anyone would actually dress a girl in pink, in case they turn out to be a man pleasing stepford wife.

TheXxed · 18/12/2013 20:55

Hahahaha! I feel your pain, once a woman came up to me in westfield and told me my son was to beautiful to be a boy.

He has a full head of curly hair, dark eyelashes which make him looks as though he is wearing mascara.

I just smile and keep moving.

bluecheeseforbreakfast · 18/12/2013 20:55

Yabu, baby boys and baby girls look no different to each other.

Why would it bother you?

Pink does not equal girl, my ds has a lovely pair of pink stipend leggings and a purple jacket. His blanket is pink and grey.

It's nice that people are interested in your baby, just tell them she is a girl.

gaggiagirl · 18/12/2013 20:56

My DD gets mistaken for a boy all the time. I have rarely dressed her in pink though as she is ginger at pink doesn't suit her as much as blue.
She's got really long hair too!
Don't dwell on it, people say funny things and new babies don't look male or female.
Congratulations on your beautiful girl.

Permanentlyexhausted · 18/12/2013 20:58

Maybe they are supporters of the Pink Stinks campaign making a point?

Is it really that big a deal?

WorraLiberty · 18/12/2013 20:59

Lots of pink on a baby still mostly equals girl in the real world

Not so much on MN though

TheOneAndOnlyAlpha · 18/12/2013 20:59

We all look the same in birth and old age.

BenNJerry · 18/12/2013 20:59

I had the opposite, everyone thought my DS was a girl! It didn't bother me too much though.

AuntyDepressants · 18/12/2013 20:59

I had this in reverse. 'What's the name of your little girl' was often asked of my baby boy. 'Mary' was my reply after I got to the point of being too bored to repeatedly explain to different people.

AuntieStella · 18/12/2013 21:02

Colour blind?

There really is no need to display her sex with excessive visual 'clues' though. They're much the same at that age, an as long as they're the right temperature and comfy, they really neither know nor care about hue.

LaurieFairyCake · 18/12/2013 21:03

They all look the same - vaguely potatoey-asexual

I can't imagine taking offence at this

whereisshe · 18/12/2013 21:04

Does it really matter? Your baby doesn't speak English yet, she's hardly going to experience gender confusion as a result of a few harmless comments.

Pleasenomorepeppa · 18/12/2013 21:06

A man once told me how lovely my son was & asked his name.
I said "Florence" & he said, "Laurence is a great name" & wandered off.
She was 8 month old, in a dress & was wearing a hair slide .

coppertop · 18/12/2013 21:09

People frequently assumed my then toddler ds2 was a girl and would say how lovely 'she' was.

A few years later I had dd2, who looked identical to ds2 at the same age. Lots of people assumed she was a boy.....

They're just making conversation. You can either correct them each time or just smile and nod. The latter is much easier.

Salmotrutta · 18/12/2013 21:10

I got mistaken for a boy when I was 13.

Tall, skinny, short hair.

I was however wearing earrings (this was back in 19Oatcake when boys didn't generally have earrings unless they were a pirate) so I was a bit offended.

I was also wearing girls clothes.

Pinholes · 18/12/2013 21:10

DD is 2yo and today was wearing a pink coat and a dress (a grey dress but still a dress) with tights and little 'doll' shoes (the t-bar sort).

At the shops I had no less than four people refer to her as a boy. She likes pulling the wheeled shopping basket along and a lady remarked to her husband "oh, look at the little fella helping his mammy". At another shop she was sayin excuse me please to everyone she passed and an older lady told me "he's polite, isn't he? ... Or is he a she? He? She?" I replied that she is a girl, she smiled and nodded at my prominent baby bump "what a lovely little boy, maybe a girl next time eh?" The other two told me "he's a happy little lad, isn't he?"

I don't let it bother me, there's nothing I can do to stop it so why worry?

HuglessDouglas · 18/12/2013 21:12

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Floopy21 · 18/12/2013 21:13

It's a trying time, you're tired& hormonal, in a few months you won't even bother to correct them! Congrats, I bet she's beautiful

Permanentlyexhausted · 18/12/2013 21:24

Pink is not such a gender-specific colour in many other countries and wasn't really used specifically for girls in the UK until WW2.

People muddling up your baby's gender might be a little irritating but "There's no mistaking that he's a boy, is there?" ain't the greatest coment either!

HoFuckingHoFuckingHoneydragon · 18/12/2013 21:31

It goes both ways, I forgave the the lady with a teeny tiny new baby for thinking I was a boy on the basis that she was probably knackered and I was wearing a batman hat, jeans, converse and ds's coat.

trinity0097 · 18/12/2013 21:36

Far less humuliating than being a grown woman with a big chest and being called Sir!

Feminine · 18/12/2013 21:37

I have 2 sons.

I was constantly asked (when they were standing by me) If I had any?

They were not babies at that point.

They wore typical boys attire.

maybe it was the eye-shadow?

VampyreofTimeandMemory · 18/12/2013 21:39

My youngest has often been mistaken for a girl. It's those lashes.

Feminine · 18/12/2013 21:39

Oh, just remembered.

My DH has been mistaken for a woman a few times also.

He is 6 "2 with a medium male build. Toned with no breasts.

I have come to the conclusion that folk see what they want to see.

Even if that means the wrong sex!

EnianShelZman · 18/12/2013 21:42

DS 12 does not look like a girl, more like a rugby type, but when shopping at Boots I asked him to hold my purse while I was choosing a lipstick and the shop assistant asked if the lipstick was for my beautiful daughter. DS got really hurt and now refuses to hold my purse at all times

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