to think that having too many parents of pupils working in a school is not good?

[scottishbelle78]

These children may be discriminated against in a view of appearing fair or it may appear that these children get priority due to a parent being staff. The latter I feel happening in the school my 3dc attended.
Children of staff seem to have a disproportionate amount of leads in school plays
Get 1st dibs in 1st come 1st served afterschool cubs.
Get picked for special activities ie things with press involved.
School events are scheduled for their benefit.
Aibu and reading too much into this.

Because it's so very tricky to handle

Be insulted all you like but I bet you will find parents at your school with a beef about it.

It's not like the 'most talented' child will lose out. Surely she could have another great part that would avoid any grief.

I think it is important to be very diplomatic in circumstances like these yes, and if the child of a governor or another teacher is always winning prizes, getting biggest school play parts then it's going to cause issues.

I think if you think it won't, then you are naive.

Go on being insulted. Nobody is looking to insult you. I am simply pointing out how things will appear to many and how there will probably be issues as a result.

winky, you very obviously have no idea what you're talking about.

How is giving this particular "another great part" any different from giving her the part she already has? Weird.

Surely any parent with half a brain even if they think "hhhhmm, wonder why she got it?" will then see her amazing performance and think "oh, that's why!"

There are a couple of girls at my son's school who often get great parts. They also appear in the West End. Some people are better than others at this stuff!

I hear a lot of grumbling at my DD's school.

DH is Chair of Govs and I run the PTA. Obviously, my child only gets picked for stuff because of us. Never because she actually earned/deserved it

She only won Star Worker last week because her Dad's a Governor - actually, it's the 1st time this term and others have won it more than once, but no, it's because her Dad's a Governor

She only got picked to take part in the school choir because her Dad's a Governor - not because it was run as an after school club anyone could join. Oh, no

Yes, she sneaked in on an over subscribed after school club, but only because I was running another club and wouldn't have been able to stay otherwise. But hey, don't worry, it won't happen again as I got so sick of the moaning that I won't be doing it again.

I get so sick of hearing it to be honest

Winky, twice in recent years we have had complaints from parents about certain children being given a number of individual sessions with our Learning Mentor. On both occasions the parents complaining were well aware that the children being supported had suffered recent significant bereavements, but they still "had issues" with it, specifically with the fact that these children were receiving individual time while theirs weren't.

So by your logic if parents "had a beef " about this as well, maybe we shouldn't have done it? Or maybe we're caring and professional enough to ignore pettiness and give the help / parts / whatever to the children who need and deserve them?

Ah of course EvilTwin. I don't know what I am talking about because I don't agree with you.

How weird.

You will find parents upset about it. That is all.

It's hardly rocket science.

And Frantic, needs such as the one you write of are a totally different issue. Nothing to do with what we are discussing on this thread at all.

And fwiw, not saying it's right that parents should beef about children of teachers at the same school getting great parts and winning prizes.

I am saying that they will.

Basic English comprehension skills required there.

winky, if any parent comes to see our show and thinks that girl doesn't deserve they role she has, then they are truly petty.

And given your assertion that the girl in question shouldn't have been given the role of Eponine, but instead an "equally great part", I think I'm pretty justified in saying that you don't know what you're talking about. Do correct me if I'm wrong - which part do you think she should have been given?

Chip, shoulder, grapes, sour?

Sensible parents will not have any beef with a child who is really good at drama/football/public speaking/dancing/whatever getting places in productions/teams. It astounds me that people have the time to care.

Perhaps not the starring role. Perhaps let another child shine. There can't be only one.

If this child in particular is so brilliant, will she get the starring role every year and nobody else?

I think there is scope for problems with this kind of scenario.

As a parent at a school where I hear other parents bitching about this kind of thing all the time, I think it is better to consider this.

Of course, as a parent who is aware of this typeof thing going on, I have no idea what I am talking about. I must remember that.

Who has chip EvilTwin? I have no issue with this.

Please let me explain again. And again.

There are parents who WILL have issue with this.

winky. Let me explain something. I am a drama teacher in a secondary school. We are not talking about the Christmas nativity play, but a large scale production which takes months of rehearsal, costs a lot of money and which hundreds of parents pay to come and see. I am going to cast it with the children who are best for the part. I don't care who their parents are.

"Perhaps let another child shine" - what, at the expense of this girl, JUST BECAUSE her dad is chair of governors? Why? How is that any fairer than giving her the part that she deserves? I find it laughable that you don't see that your point of view is exactly the same as the one you're arguing against. You are seriously suggesting that one highly talented and dedicated 14 year old should have to miss out simply because of what her dad does? The only one with the problem here is you.

I have been casting and directing school plays for years. The day I decide to cast or not cast a deserving student based on A) what their parents do and B) whether it might put some petty gossips' noses out of joint is the day I resign.

I find it risible that you are unable to understand what I have written.

I said (again) that there will be parents who feel it is unfair and a coincidence that this child is the star of the show. And other examples of children of teachers/governors getting prIzes etc.

You then accused me of having a chip on my shoulder erm, because I really care about your show or something!

I then suggested it might have been an idea to cast another child to give them a chance to shine too.

This apparently was highly insulting and outrageous.

All I meant was that it is a very difficult area and risks some noses put out of joint. Why that makes a parent a petty gossip I've no idea. Perhaps they are genuinely concerned their child isn't getting opportunities. Who knows. Or perhaps their pfb is just a pfb and isn't ready for a star part.

But such situations can lead to problems as it has done at my school.

I am not arguing with you. Merely trying over and over to put my point across. But be all hoity toity if you like Who cares?

winky. In my case, I highly doubt that anyone will think the girl in question has been cast purely because of who her dad is. I find it insulting that you think I, as a professional, would cast her for that reason. What possible advantage is there for me? I would be amazed if anyone questions it, once they've seen her. And if they do, then they are petty gossips who need something better to do with their lives.

It's not a difficult area if you are a professional. The best child for the part gets the part. You suggested I should cast someone else simply because the girl I have cast is the daughter of the chair of govs. In what universe is that "fair"? Why shouldn't she get the chance to shine? It's not like Eponine is the only female role in the show. It's one of 4 leading roles for girls. None of the others have gone to daughters of governors. When I said you didn't know what you were talking about, it was specifically referring to this case, and you've continued to prove that - if you knew anything about Les Miserables, you'd know that there's not just one main part.

Whether or not I put parental noses out of joint isn't on my list of priorities where it comes to casting a school play. Sorry if that upsets you.

Aaaaaargh.

I NEVER said that's why you cast her in that role.

God.

I said some parents at your school might think that.

And it doesn't upset me. Why on earth are you making up all this fantasy stuff?

Petty gossips perhaps who need something else in their lives perhaps but surely they could still create some issues. As they have at my dcs school. In fact my ds1 got a large part in his school play - he and three others - and there was mutterings which led to some meetings even though none of the children in question had any parents connected to the school.

The school managed the disgruntled parents so that most appeared to be happy.

That is my point. That there may well be cheesed off parents who will claim nepotism and they could cause problems and might need managing.

Gosh. Where's the wine?

Well yes I am sure a few parents will moan . A few parents moan about their child having to wear uniform, having to do homework, not being allowed to die their hair pink. A few parents will moan that their child has to behave , do an exam in silence or refrain from hitting others. That does not mean we change things to suit them.

Yeah a friend of mine had his mum teaching at our school. She went down the being harder on him than anyone else. He used to get people saying 'you're mum's a fucking cow' after she'd clapped them in detention or something. To which his stock response was' yeah I know try living with her'

No don't change things like uniform, homework etc. those things can't really be argued about as they are universal and apply to all across the school.

It just gets tricky in areas where parents PERCEIVE different treatment.

At my children's secondary school my daughter is heavily involved in performing arts. She gets a reasonable part each year in their big productions.That is because she is a) talented and b)dedicated and puts a lot of hard work in.

For the past 5 years, the main part has been taken by a very talented girl who will,I'm sure, be in West End productions before long. She is amazing.

Shock, horror, her parents have NOTHING to do with the school (although her Mum works with me at a nearby primary school)

This year, because the girl is now in Uni,my daughter is in with a shot of a main part...we will see.

If the students selected for roles or prizes are clearly the best, such perceptions are unfounded and do not warrant action .

Ah well, I'm glad that at my dcs school the staff take the time to hear out parents concerns, accurate or not.

Ah well, I'm glad that at my dcs school the staff take the time to hear out parents concerns, accurate or not.