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AIBU?

AIBU to be even more annoyed at the benefit system?

107 replies

RoseRedder · 07/12/2013 21:55

I'm not really sure what I want to say about this or how to put it

But my friend has been found dead. Details are at the moment a bit confused and nothing confirmed but it's pointing to suicide

I hadn't had contact with him for about six months then when he asked for help I obviously didn't do enough

about my friend

I found out at 8pm, I'm still taking it in to be honest.

This country stinks to high hell

OP posts:

Report

sillymillyb · 07/12/2013 22:12

Oh rose. I'm so sorry. I lost an ex boyfriend in similar circumstances back in September, and reading your post made my stomach lurch. It's all a bit shit. I'm very sorry, thinking of you

WooWooOwl · 07/12/2013 22:13

So sorry to hear about your friend

You said on your other thread, which as you linked to I hope you don't mind me mentioning, that your friend had MS. Sadly MS sufferers do have a significantly higher rate of suicide compared to the rest of the population, so I'm not sure it's entirely fair to blame the benefit system, and none of the blame will be yours either. MS is a truly shitty disease.

GobbySadcase · 07/12/2013 22:14

Ah yes of course. Because living on fresh air is sooo morale boosting.

needaholidaynow · 07/12/2013 22:15

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MoreThanChristmasCrackers · 07/12/2013 22:16

I'm so sorry OP, I read your other thread and it is so awful that people feel so helpless in these cases.
If you have a friend in this situation, yes sometimes you can help once or maybe twice in the short term but the long term must just seem too much for them.
WTF has the world come to, so sorry OP.

feebeecat · 07/12/2013 22:17

So sorry for your loss.

IDS is an absolute arse, as are they all really. And they will keep chipping away at those that can least afford it, whilst protecting themselves.

Also as far as I'm aware there are only certain shops that you can use the food vouchers at as only a few have signed up for it. There are restrictions on what you can use them for and many places didn't want to put their staff in a position where they would have to tell people what they can/can't buy. There is no such thing as "logic" with this government.

minsmum · 07/12/2013 22:20

I am so sorry for the loss of your friend. Its not you who let him down. You where trying to get the right information for your friend and that's the right thing to do as information is power.

Society forgets about the disabled as with no money to get around they become invisible so its up to the rest of us not to forget them. A society should be judged by how it treats its most vulnerable members and tbh we should hang our heads in shame

Vatta · 07/12/2013 22:20

That's terrible rose, I'm sorry to hear that.

ThisIsMyRealName · 07/12/2013 22:24

I am so sorry

I've only just seen the first thread, but it is that part of the system that makes me so sad and angry. How have we come to this?

Please don't blame yourself though, it is definitley not your fault

Whatsthatnoise · 07/12/2013 22:24

I'm so sorry for your loss MS is truly a hateful disease. I cant imagine trying to balance both the constraints of the disease with knowing that the government is unwilling to help. Do not blame yourself this is not your fault :(

Edenviolet · 07/12/2013 22:25

Sorry, have not read all of the other thread but have read the posts on here.

Really shocked that the benefits can be stopped for somebody who has ms?? That's disgusting.

So sorry about your poor friend rose. X

monicalewinski · 07/12/2013 22:26

That's awful, I read the other thread and until then I honestly didn't have a clue that people were left quite so high and dry like that.

Sorry about you friend rose

OHforDUCKSchristmascake · 07/12/2013 22:27

Jesus Christ.

OP I need to ask, how did your friend die? I assumed it was suicide but I read your other thread and now I wonder, was it from the cold? Not eating?

Im so, so sorry to hear of this.

Dawndonnaagain · 07/12/2013 22:30

I'm so sorry, Rose. I posted on that thread and was following it.

WooWoo, suicide needs a trigger, having no food and no dignity alongside MS might just do that. I'm pretty damn sure the benefits agency is at least 90% to blame.

wannabedomesticgoddess · 07/12/2013 22:30

MS is a truly shitty disease.

Yes it is. Why was he even taken off ESA in the first place then WooWoo ?

Maybe because this government don't give a shit about the vulnerable in our society. It is absolutely disgusting that you are trying to blame this mans illness for this. Disgusting.

So sorry for your loss OP. Its absolutely heartbreaking.

moldingsunbeams · 07/12/2013 22:30

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

OHforDUCKSchristmascake · 07/12/2013 22:30

Oh Im sorry ignore me. It clearly states so in the OP.

Again Im so sorry to hear your news.

RoseRedder · 07/12/2013 22:32

thank you

It's just Asda I think feebecat (in our council anyway)

I gave him £20 for his vouchers. And when I spent them in Asda I felt I would be under scrunity of what I was buying with them, so there was loads of fruit and veg which is also making me think maybe they would want to see value baked beans and pasta?

I wish I'd given him the £20 and and not taken the vouchers or given him £50

The reason he hadn't been in touch for six months was because I gave him some money before and he was not able to repay it, despite me saying I didn't want it back, due to all this and was to embarressed to speak to me.

He is a lovely guy,

This sort of stuff just stucks

OP posts:

Edenviolet · 07/12/2013 22:33

This is just so, so heartbreakingly sad.

A man with ms, probably feeling dreadful most days, benefits stopped, not enough food or any money for heat. I could actually cry about this.

sutekidane · 07/12/2013 22:33

Oh no rose :(

farrowandbawlbauls · 07/12/2013 22:36

Rose, I'm so sorry.

Darkesteyes · 07/12/2013 22:47

Meanwhile.

twitter.com/cameronsfollys/status/409439555603812352/photo/1

Darkesteyes · 07/12/2013 22:49

Rose please dont torture yourself with what ifs. None of this is your fault.

farrowandbawlbauls · 07/12/2013 22:49

[mad]

farrowandbawlbauls · 07/12/2013 22:50

Fucking fuming would be more accurate.

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