Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to change my DS's name?

149 replies

sandwichyear · 02/12/2013 18:36

My DS is 2 months old. We chose a name for him which is quite unusual, with a much more 'normal' middle name. The name we have chosen is long, hard to spell and only around 10 babies a year are given it in the UK. I had thought when we chose it that it was the kind of name that was unusual but 'known' if that makes sense, so that people might not know anyone called that but would have heard the name and would know how to pronounce it etc. It turns out that very very few people have even heard the name and every single time anyone asks us what it is, we have to explain it, spell it, discuss it etc. I am now thinking that this will be a huge burden for a young boy growing up, and that every time he says his name he will need to have a conversation about it. The middle name we have chosen is very very normal and there are likely to be a few in his class every year etc.

Should we start using his normal middle name instead or persevere with the unusual name? Would really welcome any insight from people who have grown up with a very unusual name, or used their middle name consistently (is this really annoying in terms of bureaucracy/ booking flights etc?) or anyone really with an opinion. I really like both names, so that isn't an issue. Or should we wait and let him choose himself when he's older.

Thanks very much.

PS I realise this is a first world problem etc etc.

OP posts:
ancientbuchanan · 02/12/2013 20:13

As someone else says, there is the poet Benjamin zephanaiah. I think it's great.

Keep it.

If he can't bear it later on, he can change to his middle name.

And I had to spell my name and still have to. Lots of variants. So what?

TortillasAndChocolate · 02/12/2013 20:13

It's a lovely name, definitely stick with it. And the shortened version is great too.

WorrySighWorrySigh · 02/12/2013 20:14

Two people I knew who used their middle names did so because their first names were too common even in their own families having both been named after their fathers. This was DF & DFiL and they actually had the same name as each other!

Persevere with it.

We gave our DS a name which is unusual (there have been a total of 8 with the same name since DS was born 15 years ago!).

There were some silly comments at the start (DB I'm looking at you) but it was the name we chose for him before he was born. When I look at him I never can imagine having called him something different.

Some names go in and out of fashion and it seems like every second person has the same name - I was at school in the Sarah and Stephen years. By choosing something unusual you arent 'dating' your son.

An unusual name does not mean that your DS will be teased about it. I was at school with someone called Emanuel (his surname was even more bully bait if that were possible). He was the coolest kid in the year by a country mile and his nickname was Manny.

Callani · 02/12/2013 20:15

I love it - it's fantastic and I don't think you should change it at all.

Callani · 02/12/2013 20:18

Also, I initially thought the name was Persevere... haha!

BubaMarra · 02/12/2013 20:20

Zeph is a really cool nn

AntsMarching · 02/12/2013 20:21

I thought it might be Zeph and I actually know one, he's about 18mo. It's a lovely name on a lovely boy. I find the long version a mouthful but I really like Zeph.

Bettercallsaul1 · 02/12/2013 20:21

Callani - it may yet come! Like "Endeavour"!

lisalisa · 02/12/2013 20:22

Keep it its greaet and i love the nickname Zeph. That's really cool and easy to say

SmallBee · 02/12/2013 20:27

Love it. Don't change it. I've heard of it before.

sandwichyear · 02/12/2013 20:30

oh so happy and lovely to hear the overwhelming positive responses! thanks so much! aLso really nice to hear that people know other baby zephs/ zephys (altbhough I wonder if you all know teh same one or two!)

OP posts:
Oldandcobwebby · 02/12/2013 20:31

Cool name. Stick with it.

OneMoreThenNoMore · 02/12/2013 20:33

It's a fab name! I've never heard of it before but I love it, and the nickname Zeph is cool too. Don't change it! Smile

Greige · 02/12/2013 20:40

Gorgeous name with a cool nickname. Lucky little boy:)

Length of name can be an issue no matter how long the name is. I have a four letter, one syllable name and spent most of my childhood having it lengthened for me! Even now, people get my name wrong.

AnnieJanuary · 02/12/2013 20:45

I think that's fine, to be honest. People are surely familiar enough with Biblical names by now. My son's 4 and comes home from school expertly pronouncing long names and foreign surnames -Polish, Nigerian - with ease, so there's obviously some effort going in to ensuring the pronunciations are used and taught.

I've had people stare blankly at me about "Theodore" and ask 'what is that?', so reactions are often not much to go on!

ChuffMuffin · 02/12/2013 21:00

Oooh I've not heard the name Zephaniah before but I think it's ace! My dsis is looking for biblical boys names suggestions, can't not pass that one on! Smile

FruitbatAuntie · 02/12/2013 21:00

Oo, I really like Zephaniah! It's very cool indeed. Like others have said, it reminds me of the poet.

My two sons have biblical names, just because I liked the names really, and I have had interesting reactions from family. My 'D'M said DS1's name was, 'utterly awful - I hate it, it's horrible - you are joking, right?' which upset me deeply for years. FIL said, 'God, that's a bit overly Jewish' about DS2's name (WTF!). Both pretty common, non-unusual names. I reckon rude nasty people will be rude and nasty whatever you call him.

I'd keep it though, much cooler than Daniel (also nice btw).

TalkativeJim · 02/12/2013 21:06

Oh goodness please keep it. I don't know any but were I to meet your DS my response would be 'After the poet? How lovely'. Benjamin Zephaniah is wonderful.

EssentialCoffee · 02/12/2013 21:07

I like Zeph, the full version is a bit much for me (DS has a 5 letter name, I like short names). I'm sure people won't have that much confusion with it, maybe if they mistake Zeph for Seth? I have an unusual name and I like it, it's a good icebreaker :)

KateMoose · 02/12/2013 21:10

I had never heard if it, but I think it sounds great. Keep it! When he's older, if he doesn't like it, he can swap to Daniel.

LadyHarrietdeSpook · 02/12/2013 21:45

Lovely, lovely name! Print this thread off and save it for him if he ever has a wobble about it. But he won't. Zeph is fine as a nn too.

AgentZigzag · 02/12/2013 21:53

I've never commented on a baby name thread before, but you should definitely keep the name.

I was thinking all sorts before you said (I do like a bit of a read of the name threads though Grin), and thought it didn't sound outlandish or anything. Zeph is lovely, he's going to love the difference when its coolness impresses the lasses he gets older.

2 months old? You lucky thing, congratulations Smile

AgentZigzag · 02/12/2013 21:53

(and Daniel is lovely too Smile)

Poppylovescheese · 02/12/2013 21:54

Love it! Don't change it!

evelynj · 02/12/2013 22:02

Keep it definitely. Not as weird as you think. We have a tendency to overthink our children's names I think. Also, I was always called my middle name which I hated & started using my first name when I was 20 but family & old friends still use my other stupid name. No issues anywhere.