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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

eBay...

21 replies

Jellybean20 · 25/11/2013 21:35

Name changed for this...

I feel really bad about this but I don't know if DH and I were unjustified or not. DH bought something on eBay that cost £200. He paid straight away via Paypal. The person selling the item sent DH a message, saying that he was selling the item as he has a terminal illness and is needing to get rid of some things. It would be posted within the week.

2 weeks later, the item has still not been sent. DH messaged the seller, who replied that he was currently bedridden and had been unable to post the item. Thanked DH for his patience and said his sister would post it to us soon. Waited for another 3 weeks before messaging again. Seller again replied, saying that it would be posted by Tuesday at the latest (last week). DH waited until Wednesday before messaging again saying that unfortunately he would be asking for a refund. Got a very abusive reply full of swearing, that he was sorry but he had more things to worry about such as his terminal illness, and calling DH the c-word. DH didn't reply, just put into Paypal for the refund which we are still waiting on.

I initially felt bad for this man and feel as if we should have been more sympathetic. I understand he must have a lot of things to worry about but we waited patiently for over a month for this item, we were down £200 and had no idea when we would receive it. Then he was very abusive in the message to DH so I sort of stopped feeling sorry for him.

Were we being unreasonable? He did make me feel quite guilty...

OP posts:
NickNacks · 25/11/2013 21:36

It's a scam...

Jellybean20 · 25/11/2013 21:37

Do you think? I feel like a right bloody tool if it is, grrrr

OP posts:
BikeRunSki · 25/11/2013 21:38

I don't think YWBU. If you list something on eBay it is your responsibility to send it out. If you can't for whatever reason, then it's only fair to give a refund after 5 weeks!

HeadfirstThroughTheTimeVortex · 25/11/2013 21:39

He was well enough to list the item.

NickNacks · 25/11/2013 21:39

Yes I do. Sorry.

phantomnamechanger · 25/11/2013 21:42

I would have had a nosey at what else he had sold and what his feedback was like recently - maybe he is genuinely ill, but surely he has someone who can keep his part of the deal and post stuff out, and if not you should be able to ask for a full refund without abuse. report him to ebay. if he was a decent sort he would have apologised weeks ago and OFFERED you a refund as he had been unable to complete.

dowhat · 25/11/2013 21:44

Definitely NBU. 5 weeks is more than enough time to wait and you didn't deserve to have abuse hurled at you.

Walkacrossthesand · 25/11/2013 21:44

I don't think you need feel guilty. Bit convenient for seller to become bed-ridden between advertising and selling - and then promise he'd get item posted and not do it. You're supposed to dispatch within 3 days, you've been more than patient waiting 5 weeks, and now you have no confidence that item will arrive - especially as seller has been abusive. There are some real shysters on eBay.

OHforDUCKScake · 25/11/2013 21:44

If you open a dispute with ebay you will get a refund pretty much straight away, no questions asked.

You have been scammed good and proper.

What was their feedback like? What 'other items' are they selling?

FortyDoorsToNowhere · 25/11/2013 21:52

there seems to be a lot of ill seller on ebay.

PrincessWellington · 25/11/2013 22:40

They were trying to fob you off until you couldn't get a refund. Con 100%

MadAsFish · 25/11/2013 22:42

Absolutely a scam. Start a case with Paypal and escalate to a claim immediately. If he hasn't sent it, well, he's not out anything, and you do NOT want to go over the 90 day limit.

Laurel1979 · 25/11/2013 22:50

You can look him up on goofbay.com which will give you full details of what he has bought, when and for how much. I've always found it useful when items have been late etc. it also allows you to see his buying activity, which would help ascertain if he really has been too unwell to buy/sell stuff. Not to mention the fab sniping tool......

Laurel1979 · 25/11/2013 22:51

Oops I meant to say "what he has sold"

pigletmania · 25/11/2013 22:57

Yanbu at all, seller probably does not have cancer. That des not stop him suing a refund f he is unable to fufil his side of the contract

AchyFox · 26/11/2013 01:15

How many transactions has he got ?

Sounds like a scam.

Oodyouthinkyouare · 26/11/2013 01:37

Definitely a scam , open a case Immediately online & id even ring eBay once that has bn done as well just to tell them .
5 Weeks is a bloody long time , especially for such an expensive item .

Jellybean20 · 26/11/2013 06:16

Thanks everyone. We have started a case with eBay. Apparently some other people have gone through the same thing with this seller, so whether he is ill or not he hasn't been keeping his part of the deal. I hope we get the refund quickly.

OP posts:
bellablot · 26/11/2013 06:39

This happened to me buying something where the proceeds went to charity. Took them forever to send the damn thing, took forever to come and they tried to land me with the tracking of it. Regardless of the story behind it, you bid and won an auction, you paid, you expect item in post with no problems, end if story.

RaxacoricofallapatorianCatpuss · 26/11/2013 08:31

Ebay is just shit nowadays! My mum is selling an item which has had a lot of interest. She set her reserve at a decent price which was well below the retail price.
someone messaged her asking what the reserve was, and when she told them, the reply was "for that price mate, you can fuck off!" Shock she was absolutely mortified!
She's had people buy and then just not pay, only to bid and win at a cheaper price under a different name next time round, its just been awful! Sad Sad

Shonajoy · 26/11/2013 08:37

Glad you've started a case, that's a scam and totally trying to get over the time limit for claims!

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